I have been reading this thread with great interest. While I am confident I did the right thing in my unique situation, I feel that violence is not always appropriate.
I also need to clarify a few things regarding my earlier post. I gave the impression that CPD officers lied under oath and stated that the father attacked me. Here is what actually happened in the moments right after he struck his daughter:
As I saw him hit her, I was approximately ten feet away. I immediately called on my radio for backup and ran to prevent him from hitting her again. I grabbed his arm and twisted around to subdue him. At this point I had touched him first. He then swung tried to hit me in the face. Instead, I swerved out of the way and he struck me on the shoulder.
Well, that was it, I went after him and in the process of trying to subdue him, his head hit the concrete. This is what broke his jaw. I got a pretty bad contusion from hitting the ground along with him. The ribs were from a little back and forth as the cops were running up the ramp.
One of the paramedics had arrived on scene while I was trying to get the guy under control (6’something, a big guy, and drunk-not fun), so they were tending to the girl.
Was I concerned at that moment about what might have happened or might happen later had I intervened? No.
Did I worry about it later, as DCFS was called, the mom called to come get the daughter, I was filling out report after report, the cops are deciding whether to drag me in or not, etc. Yes.
This is why spent the better part of a week following up with Family Services (wonderful people by the way - If I had to see what they see everyday, well, I’d have a hard time) and talking to the mom trying to get her some help. I actually drove her (on my own time) to the DCFS offices and helped her with the paperwork.
Why did I do all this?
Well, I was that little girl (shut up!) when I was a kid and no one did anything about it. In fact I spent enough time in a fundamentalist Christian community that I even believed I deserved dozens of spankings a day over trivial things like not saying “yes ma’am” or sir to an adult in the community.
I distinctly remember being 8 or 9 and thinking “I will never let this happen to any kid I see”, after getting a whipping in public for some trivial infraction. I would have happily gone to bed without dinner or worse in order to see some adult stand up to the sanctimonious assholes who passed themselves off as spiritual leaders.
Would I do it again? Absolutely.
I have no problem going up to a parent who locks their kid in a hot car and yelling at them in front of the whole store.
I will report a parent to DCFS or the police when I see them with their kids in the front seat with no belt.
My basic train of thought is: is the child in immediate danger?
If yes, I will act. Period. Regardless of the situation, surroundings, or circumstances.
If no, what are my options? If I have any, I will use them. If that means getting plates and calling the cops, fine. If it means stopping, talking to the neighbors, and calling DCFS, fine.
Here in IL, all teachers, health care workers, and other adults in a position where they are in contact with children on a regular basis are considered “mandated reporters”. This means that , if they see abuse or signs consistent with possible abuse, they must report it to the appropriate authorities.
While I am not legally bound to this rule, ethically and morally, I feel that I am.
Maybe it’s too confrontational for some, but I could not live with myself if I didn’t.
p.s. I respect those who for whatever reason, feel they are unable to step in. It is a personal decision, and one that involves taking on a considerable amount of risk. I would not dictate that everybody must behave as I do, but I hope they would do whatever they could, even if it is taking down whatever information they could and passing it on or taking the time to notify someone who can intervene.
I believe I’m paraphrasing but:
is a central part of my core belief.