Puzzle: Revenge of the Spies

The Game Room
1

Bam! Bam! Bam!

There is a loud knocking at your front door. Perhaps it is Special Agent Jones of the CIA. Whenever the CIA has an extremely tough code they cannot crack, they always turn to You. After all, are You not the finest cryptologist in the land? Of course You are! You stop at the coffeepot to start a fresh pot of Organic Costa Rican Blend, and then head to the door.

“I didn’t expect you back so soon, Jones,” You say as You swing open the door.

“Jones?”

No one is there. You look left and then right down the corridor. You see not a soul. The hallway is empty.

This is puzzling indeed. You are sure You heard a knock. Who could have…? It is then You notice the envelope at your feet.

Picking up the mysterious un-addressed letter, You slowly turn back into your apartment. You can hear the drip-drip-drip from the brewing coffeepot, but otherwise all is silent. You sit down in your favorite rocking chair and slit open the envelope. A typed message inside reads thus:
+++++

Dear Expert CIA Codebreaker,

I want to congratulate you on solving my last code and embarrassing me in front of my fellow spies. I had promised that my code could not be broken. But, to my amazement, you cracked it in less than two hours. I am quite impressed. However, let’s just see how you do with my latest effort.
I am giving you an exact duplicate of the coded message I sent to my comrades yesterday. You have only two hours to solve it before a certain event happens. If you succeed, you may prevent the occurrence. However, WHEN you fail it will begin a process where I make a fool out of you. How will all your admirers react when they witness your inability to stop me when you have my code right in your hands? I will destroy your reputation. You should never have messed with me!

With venomous loathing,

Klaus

MRVA2ECSA2A2CGOL2A2H2I LA3ET IE6U2EEE6N2RVE5 T2RUXVB SD2SA2GR2GXWAT2EKE EXH2EUE2LR3 “U2A2H2E2WR3 MDWA2S2RNAO2R2O3PI2I” L2E3A2R3GDO3AU2R4H2E H2XWKHR4 N2XN2E2 MDN2DGTN2E3. L2XORAE2WC2 N2RU2A2 S2E2NDO2BKDWX T2R2GR2 VRLCKXLEKE2T2ES2I L2AL2OO3B U2CS2E4S2RME4GR3S2R4A2PU2DH2A3I2TA2DA2E3 UR2WR IR4TR4S2C2UDN2R4NRSA3TEI2EHE6. N2E5AA NC2OE2O3E3VT WD2WPVO VALA2A2PSPSAKXKEU2ES2O U2XTA2 U2DH2DI2A3O3KGRS2E3 A2AEXOR4 OEU2BAPH2E4 N2CH2A2O3B O3A2S2DKE2N2E3GE3AOAXI2P. UE2O3E2VI’OA` AD2O3PT2E6SE2NXLA IA2WP VOU2EWDWRA2A KAVE3UXGX O2BN2R4MAECHE6OR4VE5SE! WATA2WC2VXHC2 WEWR3 S2KSE5ARKE TKA2DMXMPL2E6 S2R3O3CO3E3O3AO3E2NR AE2O3R2H2E3A2DLE3T2RS2RUA2 O3XL2OO3E2N2TKE5MC2 I2D2UTN2DNEL2AUA2GO. ATIE2IC2N2E O3DT2R2 UOWOGOU2OL2OLOOE3 KA3AES2D2WE2TDVR2WE3WXHXH2XNROC SRMR LAME3I2E5 KBTE6T2PSE2UES2R S2RS2TAPKE2L2KAENKNE2 EXU2D2I2IT2R2N2XO3EA2E2 SA2H2O GR3N2E4LCLE2GC2GE3L2D2SO L2CA2XI2PL2R2T2D2.

+++++

Two Hours! You glance at your watch. It is almost six o’clock now. Klaus must be angry indeed that you [thread=472148] foiled his recent plot[/thread].

To be safe You decide to call Jones and suggest security be beefed up at CIA Headquarters. Just two hours. It’s not much time. You must get to work pronto! The clock is ticking…

2

You decide to try the old standby first. Transform any letter into it’s numerical value (A=1) and detract it from the end of the alphabet, substituting it with the new letter.

It fails, and badly.

You can feel the ticking clock reverberating in the droplets of sweat glistening on your forehead . . .

3

This is truly a devious and tricky code. Sure, there are one or two points of interest, but nothing has come home yet. More sweat trickles down your brow. Hmmm… Perhaps you could try…

BRIIIINNGGGG!

Your thought are interrupted by an insistent ringing from your phone. As You reach over to answer it, You look at the digital clock on your desk. Two hours have more than passed. Outside the clouds darken…

The voice on the line is familiar. It is your friend, Agent Jones.

“Something has happened.”

“Tell me.”

“Several suspected spies have attacked the prison in Alexandria, Virginia. Andy Wilson, the spy who was caught infiltrating CIA Headquarters posing as a janitor, has escaped. It looks like a ‘terror gas’ incident. We found guards and prisoners alike cowering in every corner. It was awful— the insidious shaking and the screams of mortal fear.”

“This terror gas stuff could be a big problem,” You observe.

“Not for the CIA!” Jones responds forcefully. “We’ve developed —and had all agents take— an immunity pill. I suggest you swallow one too. We plan to add these tablets to the city’s water supply by the beginning of next week. Those spies will soon be out of the fear gas business.”

“Well that is some good news.” You don’t feel all that confident, though.

“I have more.” Jones speaks slowly. “There was a taunting letter left for you on Wilson’s cell bunk. It contains another cryptic code.”

Your heart races.

Jones continues, “I’ll fax a copy of the entire missive over to you now. It’s up to you to crack this case!”

As the fax slowly appears on your machine, you wonder: “Will You be able to defeat the villainous Klaus?”

+++++

Dear CIA Codebreaker,

Couldn’t get the job done? Too bad! I guess you are not quite the “expert” you pretend to be. Do you now realize the caliber of foe you’re dealing with? Expect another event this week. To prevent it simply solve my code, freely given below. As before, it is the same message I gave to my team of spies. They can decode it. Can you?

Hatefully,

Klaus

L2BEO HBAR3YR3EO L2R3HEYA2A2AUE2FAKCSR3YA3 “U2E2SRKCL3C FCU2E4KA3YISI” AA2YBU2BL3AU2E3AR2 LRLR3LDSA2FE3 FCUK LBFC2KR3 YA3KR3A2IFC2L2A3 KA3SRSBKC U2BLDKDL2E2 A2E2L3R3 LIHBKE4 HAYBSR2L2E4U2C2UDKR3AD2 SEUDAR3 ECAOFKFAL3E3KR. EDLA2UE2L2E2KD FCLR3UC2 EA3L3ILR2 SBA2DYE L2R3YD2LC2L3E4 LRYD2KBYE4 KC2FE4HRUR3 FC2YA3FO L2DA2ILD2 U2ITA3A2KKRTCFR3KA L3R3L2BU2R3HRYR3KD A2DSE4UBL3BA2A YE4L3IU2KYRYD. L2BYE FCLDUR3FR3 L3C2A2E AR3L3DKBAB TE2EE4 FCA2KKBEDFE2 TDAOHC2HBLI FD2HILIFD FKYA2FE4 A2DA2C2L3IEE2TITA2FC2L3BYIL3EKOA2A FE4FAAC2 A2D2SBUKLE3FO L2A2LA2FB L3E4U2R3SR2EIKDFR2 L3C2YE4FEKE4TKURYD2SA3YC2L3E4.

+++++

4

This morning You receive a call from Agent Jones inquiring on your progress, but You have nothing substantial to report. This code does not lend itself to easy solving.

“Maybe it is not a code at all,” suggests Jones. “The CIA’s computers could do nothing with it. Perhaps our friend Klaus is just toying with you, using a stream of meaningless letters and numbers.”

But You do not think so. There is both method and madness here.

Jones has a few more tidbits of information:

  • Andy Wilson is a dangerous man to be on the loose. Not only is he a ruthless spy, Wilson is also a master of disguise. This cannot be good.

  • The “terror gas” wears off after a short time — so while it is likely Wilson was affected, he is most certainly himself now.

  • The terror gas did not just raise havoc at the prison. The toxic cloud blew over a nearby high school dance and a busy shopping mall. While the shrieks, hallucinations, and shivering were not that big a deal at the high school, where such behavior is common, the mall panic has received attention in the press. Seven people were seriously injured. Right now it is being explained as a senseless mass hysteria, but several reporters from the Washington Post have been asking questions. And there is a rumor that the newspaper has information that the CIA might have been able to prevent the bizarre stampede of fear.

Jones also invites You to the CIA’s annual 4th of July picnic, but You tentatively decline. You tell Jones: “Unless I solve this code, I will not feel much like celebrating…”

5

Can we share our work, or is that against the spirit of this? This is driving me mildly insane.

6

You are making some progress, perhaps. This is quite a good thing. When you get going on these very difficult codes it is almost as if various parts of your mind are their own separate entities, each working to solve the puzzle as a whole. But these separate entities can work together. This is also a good thing! After all, the fate of the nation may be at stake.

For what are individuals really but a group experience filtered into one? You listen to the mind, to the emotion, to the intuition…Can there be real individuals, real individualityl…? Perhaps there is even a key to this puzzle in a groupthink mentality, the many into one…the one into many?

Ugh. What would Jones think of your esoteric mental ramblings. Time to stop philosophizing and re-concentrate! You sense that disaster is very close. Very close indeed!

7

In that case, I’ll ramble aloud and perhaps another part of my mind will pick up where I leave off… The numbers appear to be tied to the letter that immediately precedes it. In the first note, there is: a2, a3, c2, d2, e2, e3, e4, e5, e6, h2, i2, L2, n2, o2, o3, r2, r3, r4, s2, t2, u2. In the second: a2, a3, c2, d2, e2, e3, e4, L2, L3, r2, r3, u2.

That got me thinking that perhaps it was a homophonic substitution with those “symbols” letter + number representing a duplicative letter. Working mostly with the second code, I tried various shifts using an alphabet with the numbers after their respective letters (i.e. a = f, a2 = g, a3 = h, b = i, c = j, c2 = k, d = l, d2 = m, etc.), but it did not amount to much.

Other curiosities, there is no: B, E, J, K, M, N, V, W, X or Z in the second text (10 missing letters, but 12 additional letter/number pairs). In the first code, there is no: F, J, Q, Y or Z. Other frequency distributions available upon request.

What bothers me is there are no 1, 2 or 3 letter words represented if it is a straight substitution cipher. I’m also bothered by the ` symbol in the first code. Can’t imagine what that would be used for. I assumed the words “Alexandria, Virgina, prison, terror” would pop up in the first code, but can’t seem to find a good pattern for them.

I also note “terror gas” is often written in quotes in discussion, but can’t get anything with that out of the coded text.

8

Briiiinnngggg!

Who could be calling at this time of night? You look away from the codes (that You have been staring at for many, many hours) and answer.

“Hello.”

“Hello. This is Billy Bantam— reporter for the Washington Post. We’re doing a story about the mass panic in Alexandria at the mall and the prison.”

"I don’t see how I can help you, " You respond cautiously.

“Is it true the CIA asks You to solve their tough codes for them?”

“I have no comment on that.”

“We have unconfirmed rumors that the CIA might have had information ahead of time that could have prevented the mass panic. Is this true?”

“I have no comment on that.”

“Indeed. Is it true that the CIA brought You a secret code that may—had it been solved— that may have foretold of this event?”

“No comment.”

“Wouldn’t You say that the CIA should probably invest in high tech computer decoding and highly trained professional codebreakers instead of entrusting the nation’s welfare to novices, rank amateurs, or some pretender who may have just gotten lucky one or two times in the past?”

“No comment!” You slam down the phone in disgust.

You seethe. But this is no time for emotion. You vow to get back to work.

++++

Moments later there is a knock at your door. With trepidation You answer it and find Jones on your stoop.

“Jones. What brings you here at this late hour?”

“I’m working the overnight shift tonight at CIA Headquarters, but I thought I’d drop by on my meal break and bring You a piece of apple pie from yesterday afternoon’s CIA picnic. As You know, we always hold that picnic on the afternoon of the 3rd so that as many agents as possible can spend the 4th with their families.”

You smile. Jones is a good and thoughtful friend.

Jones produces a neatly wrapped slice of delicious looking pie. You thank him, but put the slice away in your fridge. The earlier phone call took away any appetite You might have had.

“How goes the decoding?” Jones asks.

“This cipher is tough. But I’ve noted some oddities and quirks about it. Somehow I think those oddities will lead me to eventually solving this damned thing.”

“We missed You at the picnic. Several Agents asked about You.”

“That’s nice,” You say. But You wonder if perhaps some of those very agents are now privately doubting your abilities.

“How was the picnic?” You ask, making polite conversation.

“Interesting You should ask. It was a lot of fun. Didn’t let out until about 9 o’clock. We had a bit of excitement.”

“Excitement?”

“Yes…excitement,” Jones says. “It was probably nothing, but one of our agents thought he saw Andy Wilson among a group of workers catering the picnic. For a while there was quite a hubbub, but in the end we didn’t find him. I’m sure it was a mistake. We’re all edgy right now. Really, the last place that “master of disguise” would go would be in the middle of a group of CIA agents.”

You wish Jones goodnight and good luck. He wishes You the same.

“Happy 4th of July, Jones.”

“And a happy one to You.”

You hope today will be a good Independence Day. But there’s a queasy feeling in your stomach. As you go back to work You hear the sound of distant thunder.

9

Bam! Bam! Bam!

You lift your head from off the codes lying on your desk. You had fallen asleep working on this nasty enigma. But now someone is at your door. Could it be Jones? Or perhaps Klaus has left another taunt. You hit the start button on your coffeemaker and hurry to the door.

To your surprise You find Agent Brown. You have dealt with the likable Brown before. He is young, green, a bit naive—but he has a good heart. You let Brown into your apartment. He does not look good.

“What brings you here on this holiday morning, Brown?” You inquire.

“Oh, it’s a disaster. A real disaster!”

Uh oh. “Tell me everything.”

“I had been off work at the CIA for several days taking care of my sick dog. She’s a poodle mix and hasn’t been well.”

Brown slumps down in a chair and continues:

“This morning was my first day back at work. I entered the CIA Headquarters about 6am. I wanted to get in a little early before the morning shift starts. I had so much work to catch up on.”

Brown’s voice begins to tremble as he relates his story: “I knew something was wrong immediately. The guards at the gate were all asleep. I angrily tried to wake them up…they have an important job to do. But they just kept on sleeping. I entered the building and the receptionist was also asleep. So was everyone. Everyone on every floor of the complex.”

You stare at Brown, dismayed. “How could this be?”

“I don’t know.”

You hear panic start to slip into Brown’s voice. You hand him a cup of coffee and he sips it slowly.

“I tried to awaken everyone. But it is as if they are in some kind of sleepy coma. I realized I had to get help. I called 911. The police came and ambulances were called. Then the press arrived. What’s more, none of the morning shift of agents came in to work. None at all. I called several of them at home. Their families report they are all asleep…and can’t be awakened!”

“Agent Jones?” You ask…already suspecting the answer.

“He’s out cold too. And there’s more. The safe in Jones’ office has been broken into, and some very top secret blueprints are gone.”

Klaus!

“What are these blueprints for?” You ask.

“I’m not sure. Some new weapon, I think. I’ll have to find out more.”

Brown whimpers slightly, but then regains his composure.

“I’ve got to get back to CIA Headquarters. With everyone else asleep, I guess I’m in charge.”

Wow. The secret plans are stolen. Most every Washinton CIA agent is out of commission. Brown is now in charge of the CIA. This is a disaster!

“Stay calm, Brown.” You fear the young agent may start to cry. “You say you have not been at work for the last few days. Did you attend the CIA picnic yesterday?”

“Oh no. I was not there. You see my little dog…her name is Princess…she had been sneezing and not eating for the past week. I couldn’t leave her home alone. But last night she began eating again, and today she seems just fine. I think her doggie cold is over. She is such a good little pup. But I decided I could finally leave her and go to work this morning. But now I’ve got to run the whole CIA…oh dear…”

“Good luck, Brown.” You try to sound reassuring. “I’ll keep working on the codes. Maybe today I can figure out something.”

“Oh codes…” Brown sits up staight. “I almost forgot the main reason I came here today. There was a note left beside the blown open safe in Jones’ office. I think it is for you.”

Your heart skips a beat.

Brown hands You the letter, which reads thus:

+++++

Dear Inept Decoder,

If you snooze, you lose! Events are unfolding and you cannot deter them. Why not just quit? You have been exposed as a fake. If you must try again, here is my very latest coded directive. It will highlight your gross incompetence.

Forget the Vigenere Cipher! The Klaus Code now rules!

In triumph,

Klaus

I2E4LNMR2UEKD2 I2AKPHE2 I2E4KNIIPIUIRIKESTRNSR2 12ALE MRID3SC
NPUR2HRHE3AETR2 U2D3KEHPSE4SNSORN I2E4U2NTD3U2E4SETR2KP
U2D2NTPDLIUD2ME3 HAKRRPPDRE4RC-UE3I2NUR NTAD PRPIPE4MD3TILE3
PE4KEU2IU2TLE2RIKR2. SE3PE3 KRHD2SDIE4 I2E4UPTRKOAA
SISD2IE2INRNU2CSATE3MTIDUNUE MDMNRTPAUTHD2SEHAAD3PD3IC. PDMR
I2TTOHC UE3RE2RD3MIIE4HT RD2LELNU2ILD TCI2E4I2TID3HD3 MTPEAD2
HOKOMO. ADRE2MRMPSP UD2LIAD3IE2MD2LP KRKTKNKC I2EI2E2UD2IA
PE4SRKNPAU2EUI MELEPCSPNRHE2AP MIPDIE4UR2SRUE3 UE4KEPE2MPRERD
I2E4LD UD2 UIAPKOLE3U2E2HD MRPC LE4RIMR2ROHRPILPLT.

10

You are sick and tired of working on these stinkin’ codes. Time for a break. You lie down on the couch and soon fall asleep. You dream. And in your dream You meet up with Blaise de Vigenere:

^V^V^V^V^V^V^V

Vigenere: Bonjour! What is it that worries you so?

You: I have the responsibility of cracking an impossible set of codes.

Vigenere: Ah, if a code can be devised, it can be broken.

You: I have tried many of the usual tricks, but to no avail.

Vigenere: In order to find out how to crack a code, you must first ask why the code is as it is. You have discovered several curiosities in this code you seek to understand. Look for more. When you look at the makeup of a code, you often find a map of how to solve it.

You: But the letters don’t seem to have any rhyme or reason. And don’t get me started on those annoying numbers. I wish those numbers were not there!

Vigenere: And if the numbers were not there, would you discover anything more?

You: If they were not there…?

Vigenere: The numbers obviously serve a purpose. But you have also noted a strange limited variety of letters, have you not? Why should they be as they are? And what of the word lengths? Look at the oddities you have found and others you may find. Only if you can explain them can you decipher this code and plot a course to save your nation.

You: Any other vague hints you’d like to offer?

Vigenere: If you want to open a locked door, you must first find the key. I think you have a key right in front of you, but you have not seen it. Once you find the right keys, you may open the doors and solve all four coded messages.

You: But I only have three coded messages.

Vigenere: I’m sorry. I’m getting ahead of things, aren’t I? Heh-Heh.

^V^V^V^V^V^V^V

CRASH!!!

You are awakened as a rock smashes through your living room window, sending glass shards flying in all directions. Tied to the rock you find this, the fourth sneering message:

+++++

Dear Defeated Quack,

Thought I’d write and ask a favor. Please send off a letter to the Post admitting my unqualified superiority. Your friend Jones is history. Do you want to be next? Once I have my new weapon your chances of beating me are zero. Give up now!

Smugly,

Klaus

LA3 SDYD2LRLA2 KQKE3SR U2U L2QLCACME4UE LDLEUE2KE2UC UA3L2CLQ
U2DL2A3L2K’MC YKL2A2GDAELKSQ (KCU2EGE, KKKA YAYD2YE2 L2QS2EAQ
MUMKYE4 MD2S2ALCU2K GFAU U2D2S2CSKLQ MAL2UGA3, GE4U2F
AKAA2U2ALA2GA3 YEYA3 L2QLCAQU2DLQLA2MA3). ME4L2E3SF’LT
U2DSUUFMA3U2TYFLASDMK AE3KEYEUC KK L2QS2AU2D3S2D2AU
MTU2AYA2KFAU YUSA3AAL2D2KE3SE4AEU2E4 KKU2Q GTUCS2D
ATLD2YA2AE4SAAKUA3 U2TU2AUD3 SFSE2LFKD U2FGD2L2TLELULA2U2D3YA
S2A3KEGQKRSQ. GD2URL2ALQYA2 UE2LRME4, GAAA3AA3AQ AFL2E2
AE3YTLRME4 U2DYD2SCLDSRSUUD3 UA3KRAA2 KCUUUD3UFLA2. U2A2UUUUUE
KKGKSK KE4AKYDAQMAU2F GD2KA2YK L2RGD3 GUS2E2!

+++++

11

Today’s Washington Post issues a scathing investigative report detailing the CIA’s failure to stop the spies:
Amateur Codebreaker in Charge of CIA Sleep Case Fails Nation

You do not read it. You have turned off all forms of media for the past week.

You have spent the entire last twelve days trying to break the “Klaus Code”. You have not left your home. Dishes pile up in the sink. The only coffee left is a cheap vanilla decaf. This morning You ate the last bit of food in your refrigerator and decided to take a break. “A trip to Whole Foods later tonight,” You contemplate. But then You immediately feel guilty for thinking of yourself. You usually enjoy Acrostic puzzles, but they are no help today. You do not want to admit that this code has gotten the better of You.

Try as You might, You are unable to connect the dots. How could You let this Klaus fellow beat You? You have let your good friend Jones down. He has been asleep since the Fourth of July. The other agents are the same. The metaphorical darkened clouds turned into a hurricane.The solution to all this is in front of You, but You cannot solve the puzzle. Why? What are You missing? You even begin to doubt yourself.

As the day progresses You become increasingly delirious. Now, evening approaches. You feel even more tired. But this is not a normal kind of tired. You chillingly realize that You too have been somehow drugged by the same poison that has crippled the other Agents. The dread and horror You experience is muffled by the power of this insidious narcotic. You try to reach your cell phone, but You have misplaced it. You look dazedly around for a piece of paper and pencil…to try and write one last note of hope to Agent Brown. But all You can find is an old wadded up page of graph paper. You look at it…and something perhaps clicks in your mind. Or perhaps not. You attempt to write a salutation: “To Agent Brown…”, but your pencil slides down the page as You crumple forward. You sprawl across the floor.

greetingsandsalutationsbrowniamsorryicouldnotitriedbut…x and y and x and y and x and y and…signedyourfriendYou

In a final vision before You lose consciousness You see Vigenere. His head is buried in his hands.

Can no one help? All appears to be lost…
:eek:

12

Well, I’m not sure if anyone else is following the thread, but I’ll share what I had been trying since the last post seems to indicate I may have been on the right track…

Because the word lengths seemed off, I assumed each character had to be represented by more than 1 character, if you remove the numbers or assume the numbers are part of the preceding later as I discussed above, then there are an even number of characters in each word, so I grouped by two. Example from the last message “LA3 SDYD2LRLA2 KQKE3SR” becomes “LA3__SD YD2 LR LA2__KQ KE3 SR”, etc.

I then assumed that each letter pair intersected on a chart to represent a single character, which seems to be confirmed by the “graph” “x y” comments above. Problem was, I did not know how to represent the x, y or what to fill with. I tried the following: x and y axis: each of the letters of the alphabet plus the letter number pairs (e.g. a b c d e e2 e3 e4 f g, etc.), and I tried the same without the letters that are conspicuously missing from each of the puzzles. Then I filled with an alphabet sequence, starting left to right and continuing on the next line where I left off. I tried this beginning with each letter of the alphabet in sequence, but only got gibberish on each translation.

And that’s where I stopped…

13

Also tried using only the letters that actually show up in the note in the X and Y positions so that the X is different than the Y, and then filled with an alphabet. Example starting with “a” and the resultant apparently useless translation below:


	A	C	E	G	K	L	L2	M	S	S2	T	U	U2	Y
A	a	b	c	d	e	f	g	h	i	j	k	l	m	n
A2	o	p	q	r	s	t	u	v	w	x	y	z	a	b
A3	c	d	e	f	g	h	i	j	k	l	m	n	o	p
C	q	r	s	t	u	v	w	x	y	z	a	b	c	d
D	e	f	g	h	i	j	k	l	m	n	o	p	q	r
D2	s	t	u	v	w	x	y	z	a	b	c	d	e	f
D3	g	h	i	j	k	l	m	n	o	p	q	r	s	t
E	u	v	w	x	y	z	a	b	c	d	e	f	g	h
E2	i	j	k	l	m	n	o	p	q	r	s	t	u	v
E3	w	x	y	z	a	b	c	d	e	f	g	h	i	j
E4	k	l	m	n	o	p	q	r	s	t	u	v	w	x
F	y	z	a	b	c	d	e	f	g	h	i	j	k	l
G	m	n	o	p	q	r	s	t	u	v	w	x	y	z
K	a	b	c	d	e	f	g	h	i	j	k	l	m	n
L	o	p	q	r	s	t	u	v	w	x	y	z	a	b
M	c	d	e	f	g	h	i	j	k	l	m	n	o	p
Q	q	r	s	t	u	v	w	x	y	z	a	b	c	d
R	e	f	g	h	i	j	k	l	m	n	o	p	q	r
T	s	t	u	v	w	x	y	z	a	b	c	d	e	f
U	g	h	i	j	k	l	m	n	o	p	q	r	s	t
U2	u	v	w	x	y	z	a	b	c	d	e	f	g	h

h mfjt uam s wvqrf jztmb nwv qig’x nuhufy (ugx, ee nfv wdq nhx zjvm bg eziv hmf, nk aomtf hp wvqqvtj). rcg’x qojjelfmh wyhb e wjsbg zmbcg tkayasuw ec vbn sxbkian emr gqdi kvyzltsn lytiy. vpgvb tjr, dccq yo wfjr qfyjmor nio urrjt. arrf edi oarqhk vsn kj jr!

I liked the fact that both letters following the apostrophes ended up the same, but was discouraged by the two letter word with the same letters “ee” in the parenthetical.

14

You know You are in some kind of special hospital. Every once in a while a nurse or doctor peers grimly over your face, takes your vitals, or plays with the many tubes attached to your arms. You are aware from time to time, but you can neither move nor communicate. Occasionally You veg out, but at other moments you know exactly what is happening around You. A reporter from the *Washington Post *sneaks in and takes your picture, but seconds later he is chased out by hospital staff.

Trapped immobile in the prison of your non-functioning body, you have little to do but contemplate the Klaus Code. Everything is memorized clearly from your 2 weeks of labor. You realize that You have most of the keys to this code…except possibly the most important. Why are the letters in each code as they are?…You believe You have correctly connected letters to numbers. You like your graph idea. This puzzle is probably a whole lot simpler than You have been thinking. Most spy codes are. But even if You solve the codes, what can You do? Things could not be bleaker.

As You ponder You see Agent Brown at your side. He looks so sad, so spooked, so “in-over-his-head”. He has brought his dog to visit. Brown looks at You for a long time. His friendly animal tries to lick your hand, but the little dog cannot quite reach You. Brown sobs. The puppy whimpers. Finally Brown takes his pooch and slowly exits. You want to cry out to them. But of course, You cannot.

Time passes. Your mind whirls in a fog. Have You been here for hours or days? You despise the spies. And now it is time for your sponge bath. As Nurse Cindi begins, You turn your mind elsewhere. Nothing to do but concentrate on these codes. I mean they are the only thing You have…right?

15

Reading yes, but too busy to actually try and solve it unfortunately. :smiley:

16

You can see the nurse enter your room and come towards your bed. But instead of fluffing your pillow or changing the linens, she leans over and hisses into your emotionless face. “Hello Codebreaker!”

This is no nurse. It is Andy Wilson in disguise.

“Thought I’d come by and see the one who got me sent to jail. Not so tough now, are you? The boss wanted me to drop off a little note. You know, we’ve all enjoyed reading his clever taunts that come with the codes. He’s sure made a fool out of you. The boss is a genius! He told me to hang this new letter by a thread in front of your face so you could stare at it for as long as you want. So that’s what I’m going to do.”

The phony nurse ties a thin string to a pipe running over your bed. He then drops the message down in front of you.

“I could kill you now, of course,” sneers the impostor nurse, “But where would be the fun in that?” He leans forward and makes an evil laugh. “You’re going to be in a coma prison forever. And I’ll be free and part of the few who will soon control the entire world. Think about that, you catatonic cryptologist! Ha! Ha! Ha!”

You cannot even react as Wilson slinks out of your room. All you can do is stare at this latest note, dangling in front of your face:
+++++

Dear CIA Quasi-Vegetable,

How’s that nap going? Hope you are getting plenty of rest. While you are zonked out in the hospital, I am quietly corresponding with my fellow spies as we prepare to finish what we have started. This will be my last letter to you. Next I’ll be taunting the president or writing a triumphant dispatch to a newspaper. Enjoy my latest coded note. Ponder it for the next twelve years. Pleasant Dreams!

Exultantly,

Klaus

NA2TE’YE3 LVNBUA4LAU2EYU LGTIYQXIAI2L3B T2QNA4KA3UT NE3AT
L3A4U2E3AA3NE4TCEQUDTE2 KLL2A3 T2E3LLYTLGT2A2 TLKTSE
A2E2NCTILA4A2A3SE3UI2UU AE3U2RL3E3L3GA2A4U2E. XCSDXGXE4XA4XDXSXC
T2E3YD TST2E4LEYA2YBKQTL! YVA2IAI2L3E3T2DTU LBKE2NUNR
TE2TQNCKE3L3AL3DTVEE3 T2E3A2C KSNVNE4 KA3YTNEYVTIABYE4
AVLI2ADYVLGL2S “KLA2V SE4AI2XA2 NVTINI2 TGXT TBTA3 YUL3UKVNQKU.”
UUA2A4US LE2KRYI2 TE2LAL3EKSL3BSCA2I2TENUUTTT EVXEL2Q
KAA2VU2A3UA4A2GSISI2 T2E4NQT2A2 A2I2UE4KE2UA2YA4 SE3NEKA3U2B
KE2A2TNE3YAU2E2YE4ARSE3 EA3ECNRSA4KQA2SLE4L2A3A2T XLYE2EA4SL
U2A4NVL2R EA2XEUAUCLUUVASLVNUT2TTA3. EAAI2 L2E2SEYDUL YE4NC T2E3U2L AA2AAAA T2QYST2TU2IL2Q KRT2E4T2A2L3A3L3B A2TA2EL3V. A2DKE2NA3L3Q T2LKA3A2C AIAA2AQ XEKQKLT2VU2E4 U2SNVA2U U2GA2TKE4 KDU2Q A2DKE2SUAE.

+++++

17

What time is it? What day is it? What month? You have no idea how long You have been in this narcoleptic nightmare. One by one You keep going over the codes in your mind. You even have the last one memorized. It seemed to hang in front of your face for a very long time. But the solutions are still out of reach.

And…and… You have the distinct impression someone said something important to You during this period of gross miasma. But who? And what was said?

Your ruminations are interrupted by a visit from Agent Brown and his oddly-coiffed poodle. Brown looks even less healthy than You imagine You do. The haggard Agent clings to his puppy like a security blanket.

“I keep hoping you’ll wake up,” whimpers Brown. “Things just continue getting worse.”

He sets his dog down on the end of your bed and pulls out a small bottle from his coat pocket.

“My grandmother suggested I try the healing power of holy water. This is strawberry-kiwi flavored and vitamin-enriched too.”

Brown really seems to be losing it. But what can you do? Nothing. Nothing but stare forward as Brown splashes the fruity blessed beverage all over your head and shoulders.

This is all too surreal.

“I know this is crazy,” sobs Brown. “But I am at my wit’s end. That psychotic Klaus fellow has sent a letter to President Bush demanding he convince the rest of the world to surrender to the spies. And Bush may have to do it.”

Brown lets out a desperate sigh. His inquisitive dog creeps up the bed, sits on your chest, and stares curiously into your face.

“Klaus also sent the President a coded message. Yesterday I got a call from the White House. They tell me it is my responsibility to decipher these puzzles. They said if we get taken over by the spies it will be all my fault. I could even get fired.”

Brown trembles and collapses into the chair at your bedside. He begins to openly weep. His dog meanwhile has decided she likes the taste of strawberry-kiwi holy water and begins licking it off your nose.

Arrgh! The spies seem about ready to rule the world. Jones and much of the CIA are still fast asleep. Your reputation is ruined. You’re pretty much a vegetable. And now this furry-tongued flea-bitten mutt is licking enhanced holy water off your nostrils.

Enough. Just enough.

“Get this damn dog off of me!” You scream.

Brown looks at you, shocked. His frightened poodle leaps down and huddles under your bed.

“You’re awake! The holy water must have worked! Hurrah!” Brown jumps in the air with joy.

“Enough of this!” You declare. You lift yourself from the hospital bed and pull the various tubes from your body. You rise shakily to your feet. “This has gone on long enough. I think I’m ready for a little revenge myself.”

Before the ecstatic Brown rushes off to find your doctor, You ask him for something. Yes, he has it. A copy of the letter sent to Bush.

You, now wide awake, glare at yet another sample of the devious Klaus Code:

+++++

Dear Prez. George W. Bush,

In a few weeks I will be in control of a doomsday weapon. You are to go to the United Nations and request that the world submit to me. If you do not do this, I will begin pulling satellites from the sky and exploding them onto different cities. I even have the power to destroy the Earth by sending the moon crashing into our planet. I just ended the career of your “expert” codebreaker. No one can stop me now! I’m so confident I’m including my latest coded message with this letter. But you had better hurry. Zero hour approaches!

Your future emperor,

Klaus

OOOB R2PE2BKH O2E3R4ZYE RR2R3R2R2R3R2R3 U3WO2ZSE4PO R4E4U4R
R2R3R3R2RR2RR2R3R2SR AZR3U U4E3E3GU3E4AG, R4SSS’O2WE2R2
AAAE4EEE2BPSMR2 R4DYZE3G2LWR3H EPPR3 ESO2UO2SE2O OE2E2E3YPO2A
MBE2G2O2E2 YE2FWO2AU3DR3E2. EWR3GLE3 KGU3UU4PU3SR4E3LWSWR3H
AR2AWSE3O2R2LE4R4P E2UKWLE2AE4 U2EAP O2E3SE2LSE2WLE2O2RR3EFRKG
E2R3FR3YE4OB AR2PE3REYE3MR3R3RU4G. E2BE3E SHOSAZSZAHR2ZR3R3SD
R4ZE3HLRSZFHTA E3EYE4EE4EPE2Z TP AR2R2WKSU3G
E2PR4ZR4G2O2DSGKZSEED R2OLZO2WKR3 SE4U2O ME3U4E4R2E3E2GAG2
E2UAR3U4AE2Z AA AR2FGOHTZLZO2AMA E3SE3GLPO2E4U4P
ADLZTAO2ROZTOAR3U4R3PE. UAR3SEWPE3O2A LR3U4BKWU3E4
PRASPOMEKOU3E4MR2ER3R4ZESU3OMZRU U3E R2R2R4E4 R4E3U2E4R3G2E2R
E2UKE3 YG2PPLE2KS MUME4E2E3EO RG2E3GR3G2 LUMRLSYATBFSU3P
FEFAKZO2E3O2SFUUE2 U2AU4OO2G. SE3TE3U3D KER4G2AR3FDLO KZPE4
U3E2AGO2E2 TE3ER2E2E2E2E4 ADE3R2R4ZER3 LOR4OPUEWFG2
KEE2ZR4ATSTHR3E2 EOE2E3UE3KRU4USWPZFG2 R3RRG2YE2 FGE3PKG
R3G2SASR3UPO2APZ SR2E2DRHSS.

+++++

18

Updated information from the last 3 weeks:

  • There is no good news to report on Agent Jones and the other CIA agents. Each has been heavily doused with all manner of holy water to no results. The search was made to find the original source of the strawberry-kiwi holy water from Brown’s grandmother. She picked it up from an unknown street salesman a few weeks ago when a crowd gathered on an exit ramp of Interstate 95 when several people thought they saw the face of Christ in an oil spill. Further traces of this holy water have been…fruitless.

  • As the only one to recover from the strange sleep coma, you have been studied by doctors with no definitive conclusions. However, at the urging of Agent Brown your recovery has been kept secret from the press and your hospital room guarded and occupied by another sleeping agent so that no one will know you are awake.

  • The doomsday weapon is a theoretical device that creates a hitherto unknown force so powerful as to possibly cause damage to the whole universe if misused. In the hands of a nut like Klaus one can scarcely imagine the horrors. It was deemed too dangerous to build, but unfortunately the plans were never destroyed. World leaders met secretly during the Olympic Games and determined that if Klaus does have this weapon, we may all have to submit.

  • FBI profilers (the CIA profilers are all asleep) have been having a field day trying to diagnose Klaus. They believe that he actually revels in giving out his code and watching us all fail in solving it. When his earlier code was solved so quickly it must have pushed him over the edge. This new psychotic bravado has likely impressed his underlings so much that he is now at his zenith of power. The spies may follow him even at the risk of undoing the universe.

And now, this letter was sent to the Washington Post yesterday:

+++++

Dear Post Editor,

I have a doomsday device which I can use to destroy the world. I request you inform your readers that they must beg the Government to join others and name me “Czar of the Earth”. Anyone who resists will be squashed like a bug. As proof of my genius, I enclose an example of my latest unbreakable encrypted spy message.

With fervid joy,

Klaus

ISSE2 ISWPYR2AD2 YE2VOST2YTHOVD DSJE2 WT2SAWRATJR2VSWO2I2DYO
EIHO2LILT2RR I2TAO2VP FDLP I2O KTOPORDO2ID2OR2 IT2JE KEHT2ED
HSVR2FT2I2IWISRDIUR2 ISEPYISOJE2FO. AE2HDI2AJD2TR
OAIR2ES LT LR2HPKDUDUTI2ARE ISIE2TPEE2 AT2OR2RS HAHTHPKILE2RT
YIVO2ER UO OE2SOJDVEUPSDHOKT2RT2. ISOT KD2DPJS I2T2LIYO2VPIO2TD2
DO2AA ROLD DRI2ALTWT2KS AE2HR I2TJIREJE2LE2WIVSEOI2D2VSLS FTFO2FE2
TSDE2LOET2EORALAVSKIIALD2 YO2JE2ISYOTI VE2JP ASDAUSAAJD2 HSST2KS.
I2T2RR2I2R2HPJAJE2LE2LD2 KOYSAO KTLTAE2WESR2UO2 DIAE2 SEDTAE
I2EI2OI2E2KTUOI2R RO2KD2 STFALE2SRDAWR2 I2IVR2HE2I2E2KIFORT2 AE2AA
LSTDVD2RO2AO VE2TEVE OILEOD2AO2UOYAFPFSWDIOER
ODTIHTYE2I2O2SDRD2!

+++++

19

The spies have just crashed a satellite into Texas. Fortunately it landed in a remote area and caused only minimal damage to a group of small farms and a tractor supply warehouse. The truth has been suppressed so far, with only a story of a “meteor of large size” making headlines in a few tabloids.

World leaders are meeting today and are expected to turn control of the planet over to Klaus and the spies by the end of the week. If we only knew where their headquarters was located, we might still prevent this. If only You have not given up. If only…

20

I say the spies are evil for not waiting until we were all no longer distracted by the RNC and the board changeover. :smiley: