Okay, this is a stupid question about a minor character in the movie Blade. It was on this afternoon.
Who, or what, was that fat, immoblile character that worked with computers/data? The one that Blade had tortured with the UV light. Was there supposed to be a reason it was was like it was?(I’m not absolutely sure if it was male or female, it’s figure was so distorted.
Maybe I’m missing some info that tells me the answer. What really bugs me is that this question, in a movie that wasn’t all that good, nags at me.
Not very good? It was without a doubt the best vampire movie starring wesley snipes based on a marvel comic with martial arts and techno music. Aside from Blade 2, that is, which was even better.
I think he was just a very obese vampire. Since vampires don’t die of heart failure or diabetes or other obesity-related complications I suppose there’s no limit to how fat they can get and still live.
Hey, it had Ron Perlman in it. He’s one of those actors that can make something good just by appearing in it.
I’ve actually seen Blade 2 more often than 1, so my recollection of 1 isn’t that great. There was probably a reason for the blubber guy – who I do vaguely remember – you may have just missed it. (No offense intended, but that seems to happen a lot; someone thinks a scene happened for no apparent reason, but they weren’t paying attention to the right details.) If I were to take a shot without seeing the movie again, and I were, I’d say they just wanted to show another aspect of how disgustingly decadent the vampire society is.
And the Blade movies are good. They’re far from high cinema, but they’re awesome action flicks. I have a replica of Blade’s sword in my living room. Beautiful thing and sharp as hell. If the zombies ever attack, that’s what I’m using to fight them off.
I liked 1 and 2…except for that stupid-ass line that Snipes undoubtedly inserted about “Some mothafuckas always gotta try iceskating uphill,” which totally killed the finale.
Ron Perlman is in 2, but not 1, IIRC. 2 was an awesome movie, Directed by Guillermo del Toro of Hellboy and Pan’s Labyrinth fame. His intro to the deleted scenes on the DVD is pretty funny.
It is a very femme gay male vampire named Pearl who (according to the back-story) especially enjoyed feasting on small boys. Pearl is so fat he is utterly immobile and he is the reference librarian for collection of the ancient vampire lore.
Pearl is like the Comic-book guy from the simpsons, sitting around cataloging stuff and watching TV all day, Imagine if the comic book-guy was hundreds of years old, and NEVER moved, just sat on his ass eating, with no heart-attack problems.
Of course, you’re then into the question of Vampire metabolism, and whether or not they get fat like we do. I don’t remember Deacon Frost on the treadmill…
Thanks to those who have made a response to my question in the OP. I really appreciate it, especially the replies of **astro ** and bubastis. I was just wondering if there was something I’d missed in looking for an answer.
The problem I had with the second movie was that the supposedly tough vampires were, basically, idiots who ran around getting killed because they were too dumb to live. The movie was not well scripted, and while neat-looking, was hardly del Toro’s best effort.
How tough can vampires be? Blade pretty much kills them wholesale. Not to take anything away from his badassness, but he’s still just one guy.
And no love for Blade Trinity? Sure the Drake AKA Dracula plot line was crap and Jessica Biels does her usual impersonation of a very hot store mannequin. But Parker Posey and Ryan Renolds were a hilareous. I especially enjoyed the Van Wilder-esqu Hannible Kings interplay with the stiff and stoic Blade.
When the zombies attack, keep in mind that those replica type swords can shatter dramatically if you hit something hard with them. Saw a video of a guy on a Home Shopping Network type show; he hit the edge of a table with one and it shattered, with one piece going into him. :eek: