When I got married the rabbi told me the opening and pouring of the red wine was sometimes seen as symbolic of the bride’s deflowerment. She’s just one rabbi though, and others doubtless have other opinions.
There’s a broken plate during the engagement ceremony that is a better candidate for sexual symbolism than the glass.
There are numerous sites about Jewish weddings, you might try this
one
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I’ve never heard that. In any event, it doesn’t make a difference because there is no requirement that red wine be used. In addition, wine is used whether the bride is a virgin, divorcee or widow (i.e. in all cases)
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I don’t know who’s giving you these opinions, but they are way off. The plate is broken at the end of the tenaim ceremony, which basiclly states that this bride will marry this groom and spells out obligations to one another. The breaking of the plate seals this deal. In olden days, this ceremony was done well in advance of the wedding. Today, however, it is done at the wedding before the ceremony.
Zev Steinhardt
I’ve been to approximately equal numbers of Jewish and non-Jewish weddings (most of the Jewish ones were for family, but not all), and I honestly can’t remember at which ones people stood up and which ones they stayed seated. Honestly, I don’t know how they might suggest that people do either thing specifically, and know even less about why they might care.