I’m not sure I’m going to get the kind of responses I’m looking for here in ATMB, but it seemed like the most appropriate place for my query.
I am sometime perplexed by the prevalence of the term ‘SO’ on this board. This inquiry is occasioned by my use of the term ‘girlfriend’ in another thread. Whenever I write ‘girlfriend’ I am visited by a strange sense of foreboding and a concern that I am breaking some unspoken taboo by not standardizing my terminology.
Is there a reason for the use of ‘SO’ or does everyone just do it just because?
I see that there is potential for an IMHO question here. I’m hoping there’s a more easily accessible answer that can be gained by ATMB inquiry, but if it comes down to “what term do you use and why,” perhaps I’ll start a thread over there to gain some insight into individual preference.
I think the point of “S[ignificant] O[ther]” is that it handily covers “wife, husband, girlfriend, boyfriend, love-slave” without making any pre-judgments about the gender and legal status and so forth of the aforesaid S.O. Moderator’s Note: And since I don’t think this is really a specifically SDMB thing, I’ll go ahead and move it to IMHO.
I tend to assume that “SO” denotes a more serious relationshpi than “girlfriend” or “boyfriend.” It seems silly to me to refer to the person someone lives with/signifigantly shares a life with using the same term as the person someone has been seeing socially once a week for a couple months, or to refer to a high school relationship. On the other hand, I tend to assume that if people wanted to be referred to as “husband” and “wife”, they’d be married (with or without the acknowledgement of the state).
Also, as MEBuckner points out, it is a more gerneral term than any of the other and prevents anyone from making assumptions based on ingrained stereotypes.
It’s depressing how people love to turn humor into hatred. Everyone walks around looking for something to be offended about. We are living in a world of shit
Thanks MEBuckner and Manda JO. Two great answers. My curiosity is satisfied. And thanks MEBuckner for moving it, sorry to be a nuisance. I struggled with the decision of where to post.
Cull, I’ve looked over all of your posts to date, and while you might get a little rowdy with your opinions, you haven’t shown yourself to be homophobic. Try to understand that some people here are a touch sensitive about the subject, probably for good reason.
“SO” is a very good term, because it covers everything, from boyfriend/girlfriend to fiancee to husband/wife and everything in between. I use it partly because it’s short, and partly because ususally I don’t need to make it clear my relationship to the person I"m talking about because it isn’t pertinent to the post, and partly because it’s fantastic for those relationships that aren’t quite that easy to label!
I count about a dozen. Even if we’re generous and say fifty “completely, utterly, flmaingly and unabasedly gay” posters, that’s still hardly “most” of the count of 20,741 members of the SDMB as of this posting.
I use SO partly by habit and partly because I was lazy. (I had this thing in high school where I was refusing to use the words “my boyfriend” because it denoted possesion…don’t ask.)
So its SO for now. It covers the idea of a relationship more serious than dating but may or may not include marriage.
‘SO’ is not only an alternative to specific labels, like ‘boyfriend’, ‘live-in lover’, and the like, but is also a stand-in for the entire list at once.
For instance, I could start an IMHO thread entitled, “Does your SO’s snoring bother you?” ‘SO’ covers all the bases, in two easy letters.