I’ve actually sort of been in this position, because my mother-in-law takes care of our house & dogs when we go out of town. I’m sure she goes through the drawers, because she’s that kind of person. But realistically, she can’t mention anything she might find, because she’d be busted as a sneak if she did.
Hubby and I have occasionally thought about leaving things like really raunchy porn and maybe a strap-on dildo in his nightstand drawer, just because we know she’d find it and we are just twisted enough that the idea of her finding that stuff and not being able to mention it to us makes us giggle with glee.
Medical device catalogs with certain pages marked work well, too.
Actually, my mom is a former missionary and very, very conservative. She doesn’t drink at all, believes going to a movie in the theater is a sin, mutes the commercials on TV because they have that awful rock music on them and make naughty jokes, and believes that a properly dressed woman should be covered from her neck to her knees. :smack:
And the fact that I have not one, but two open wine bottles currently in my fridge, as well as 2 empty bottles on my counter would definitely offend her. Even though they were from a recent dinner party and I’m just not enough of a wine drinker to finish them off.
I believe I would solve this by telling nosy neighbor/mother/priest/boss that anyone who enters my home without my permission will get a visit from the police. (My mom is no longer among the living so I’d have no qualms about that.) I’d give standing orders to my kids that Nosy Nellie not be allowed entry.
Don’t people keep their houses locked when they’re away? How is this nosy person supposed to get in?
Like hell they will. I have a husband, four kids , a daughter-in-law and a niece living here to retrieve anything I need. No need for anyone else to be in my house.
Ok, just for you, let’s pretend that your husband, four kids, DIL and niece were all in the same freak paper cut accident. And your niece is worried about the pet raccoon she snuck in your house without telling anyone - and it’s about to have babies . . . in your heating vent - where it will most assuredly die and stink up the house if someone doesn’t go and get it out.
Go with the premise and tell us what you would want hidden, if anything.
I would be SO SCREWED if something like this ever happened because I am currently living with my boyfriend - and my parents don’t know. They think I’m still subletting with a friend. If they insisted on going to a place that I don’t even live at anymore (and for that matter, my friend doesn’t even live at anymore!!) I suppose the game would be up. Thankfully both of them work full-time jobs, so they’d expect my boyfriend to take care of something like that anyway. Just thinking about something like that happening gives me a headache.
Most of the stuff I wouldn’t want anyone to see is relatively safely tucked away already. If they found it, it would have to be after serious snooping, and then they’d only have myself to blame.
…although, if it was certain people, I might say “hide the copious and chaotic collection of action figures”. Most people know I’m a geek, but not how much of a geek, and some illusions are best left preserved.
Pretty much all my unusual equipment is packed into the bedside table. So, unless the person was law enforcement, I’d be pretty safe. If they were, then I’d ask Bob to get the OTHER unusual equipment, because sometimes people get the wrong idea when they see grappling hooks laying around.
Alternatively I would just explain that my security system rotated through 500 different challenge prompts and, if the wrong response is given, the temperature in the area in front of my door will briefly reach 800 degrees F. As would the person standing there. Even more briefly.
Oh, depending on who the nosy person was, I might ask Hypothetical Bob to hide some of our beer. Occasionally we get good stuff that’s seasonal/hard to find/both and we don’t want someone thinking, “They have plenty of beer here, and I’m kind of thirsty; they won’t miss one or two and I’ll buy replacements.”
We had that happen once when a sister-in-law who lived in the upstairs apartment chose to - without our knowledge or permission - stop in the apartment to “borrow” some stuff, while we were away on vacation. Like a case of beer when her boyfriend was over; she figured she’d just buy another case later and this would save her a trip to the store. This was a special beer (from the Berghoff brewery) that they only brew for a day or two IIRC at the start of spring, and then there’s no more until a year later. She took the whole case, and of course by the time we got back, it was all sold out everywhere we looked. My husband and I were livid, and it took a bit for her to understand - this is not replaceable beer. We could not find any and had to wait a whole year to have some again.
