R. Kelly – Closet Video _ Is It A Joke?

Is he serious with this thing? It is so bad it has to be a joke, right?

sigh

Trapped in the Closet is a series of five videoes – not just one – in which Kelly sings about the unanticipated consequences of screwing around. I caught about half of the line-up a few weeks back on BET. Looks like he’s striking out in a new direction without Ronald Isley to pull pimping duty as Mr. Bigg. The videos are hysterically operatic and are definitely being catered to soap opera-watching black women.

It somewhat reflects a strong anti-gay sentiment in mainstream black entertainment these days, at the heart of which is the so-called black gay male “down low” phenomenon (one that’s completely overblown: it’s black America’s equivalent to shark attacks) and another chapter and verse of the old “Black men just ain’t no damn good,” burning effigy of the last, oh, thirty years. It’s just part of the urban zeitgeist. Terry McMillan’s impending divorce from her blatantly gay husband is another log on that fire.

I thought it was one long video broken up into segments so R. Kelly could tell us how great it was while people cheered between segments.

If you haven’t seen this check it out. It worse than Purple Rain and probably as funny as anything Spinal Tap ever did.

I just downloaded the 18 minute 23 second :smiley: video. I know I could get slammed for this, but I thought it was good, something different, it sounded good, but the ending…

SPOILERS

At the end, when R Kelly’s girlfriend is telling him who she had sex with, I have trouble understanding what they were trying to do. My thoughts from the moment he found the condom were a.) oh god don’t let her have had sex w/ her brother (who was visiting apparently) and b.) that they would have done a full circle, the guy she had sex with ending up being the supposedly gay boyfriend of the boyfriend of the cheating girl whom R Kelly hooked up with. That would’ve been good- R Kelly is cheating on his girlfriend with a girl who is cheating on her boyfriend who is cheating on her with his boyfriend!, and then what if that guy, the boyfriend of the boyfriend of the girl, turns out to be bi and not gay and had sex with R Kelly’s girlfriend instead of it ending up being the damn cop who pulled him over. Then R Kelly could explain this all in an extra 2 minutes of video and then narrate as he pees on someone. That would have been better- I should be a writer. :smiley:

Is it as good as the “Piss On You” video? That was a masterpiece.

OOoo. Link?

I can’t link to it, it’s on Limewire. The name is ‘R.Kelly Trapped In The Closet FULL VIDEO’, and it has 73,590 KB. Limewire can be downloaded for free on the internet somewhere…

While the anti-gay sentiment may exist, I didn’t think it was that strong, if there at all in TitC. After all, the song argues that Rufus’ gay cheating is no more immoral than his wife’s heterosexual cheating, although Rufus’ wife (Kathy?) thinks it is.

Also, Rufus is presented fairly positively, isn’t he? Kelly makes no secret of his Christianity, and Rufus is a pastor - a role a Christian would see as positive. I thought having him gay was just a soap-opera style melodramatic twist rather than any homophobia. Still, it’s a while since I’ve listened to the song, so I might have missed something.

Also, the best bit of the whole thing is

Kells pulling his gun out demanding to know what’s going on and threatening to shoot someone unless they tell him what’s going on.

Except this bit is even better:

"I’m like “There’s a reason I’m in this closet”/ He says, "Yeah, like what? Are you talking clothes?

I believe, too, that the video is available from R. Kelly’s web site.

**vtynos.**It was a melodramatic twist with at least a dash of homophobic paranoia.

Rufus wasn’t a flaming stereotype, but as big a hypocrite as he’s made out to be, I can’t say his portrayal was positive. He’d been cheating on his wife at least a year, hid the truth about his bisexual orientation (and his congregation by extension), and revealed it just to get back at her for cheating on him.

Really? So the fact that I’ve hooked up with a couple of guys who are on the DL was just a freak accident?

Depends on what you mean by “freak” and “accident.” Feel free to keep the details to yourself, though.

I’m with Askia on this one. I’ve yet to see any quanitfiable numbers detailing how many black men are on the “DL”. Even the estimates seem to be all over the place.

Jimmy Kimmel has done a nice parody of this called “The Pizza”.

The hyperlink button is not working for me right now for some reason, so here’s the bare link:

http://www.putfile.com/media.php?n=Jimmy-Kimmel-R.-Kelly-Parody-PIZZA_OPERA

Could somebody educate this so-white-he’s-practially-bio-luminescent, straight, Canadian guy what the hell “down-low” means? I hesitate to make a guess.

Also, why the hell is this guy still out on the street? Wasn’t he busted for kiddie-porn?

Down low means secretly gay, as in still closeted.

The legal wrangling over the pee video is still going on. Apparently his lawyers are using stalling tactics.

See the whole thng on R Kelly’s webite:

http://www.r-kelly.com/index_main.html

Small correction. Usually, the term is applied to black men who have sex with other men, but don’t consider themselves gay, or bisexual. These men typically date women and don’t tell them about their activities with men because the don’t see it as a major issue. The term was popularized by this book, and the author’s appearances on Oprah.

Since the book came out, many people have blamed men on the DL for the elevated incidence of HIV/AIDS among black women, in addition to a whole lot of other things. It’s gotten to the point where many people think every black guy is a closeted homosexual. There are many problems with the author’s theories. Most glaring is the complete lack of support for his assertion that this behavior is any more prevalent in the black community than anywhere else. While I think there is some truth to the claim that blacks are more homophobic than average, I don’t think the are huge numbers of men living this lifestyle.

The “Trapped In the Closet” videos are ironic favorites in my house. My roommate, his girlfriend, and I love to watch it and add our own snarky comments, we sing our own banal conversations to each other in the “Trapped” style, and we now even end our e-mails with “Trapped” quotes. My favorite is “Oh my God, a rubber… rubber… rubber…” It’s so bad, it’s great! R. Kelly is truly insane because he thinks this is the deepest, most important, most stunning song and video ever, but it’s quite unintentionally hilarious.

I agree. This thing is unintentionally funny. These words shouldn’t even be sung. It doesn’t even deserve to be a song.

“Oh, my goodness, I’m about to climax!”

Why can’t we handle this Christian-like?