Be mindful of the compulsory service laws for any sons you have–it’s not always possible to avoid service by renouncing citizenship.
No, I mean the whole thing, wedding and reception, at both venues. But without the paperwork signing at one. The paperwork is usually done privately after the ceremony; guests won’t know the difference. (Of course, I’m of the opinion that the public vows is what makes a marriage binding, not the legal papers signed, but I’m old-fashioned that way.)
But you bring up the point I was trying to make: my marriage in the US is recognized as a valid marriage in Korea, in terms of employment (at least that is my understanding, I’ve never tried to work there). But since we didn’t marry in Korea, I’m not on the family record and our children will not be added to it. I and our children will not be Korean citizens, which denies us some rights but also removes some responsibilities. If our minds change in the future, we’ll register the marriage at that time.
My officiant was the president of the local bank. That was a culture shock for my side of the family.
But anyway, enough of this hijack. I wanted to make sure you were aware of your choices in terms of registering the marriage. Back to talking about the weddings.
I second going with a white dress not designed to be a wedding gown. Get something off the rack, and then get it altered to fit well and add a little lace or ribbons or whatever to suit your taste. It will look good and be much more affordable. (Just don’t tell your seamstress it’s for a wedding until after you’ve agreed on a price.)
Hee! Oh, I’m not going to disagree with that – my dress turned out to be strapless with floofy skirts and I did look beautiful. It’s more that I had this idea that I’d be this awesomely indie bride in the slinky white dress that just happened to cost only $200… but it turned out that, well, for one thing it turns out I look crappy in slinky white J. Crew dresses, and gorgeous in floofy David Bridal’s strapless
I wore sneakers. This is definitely one advantage of the poofy dress. It was great, easy on my poor flat feet, and saved my self-image of the indie bride a bit
Me and my mom had a throw-down fight right in the shoe department of Macy’s. I’m not sure if we’ve ever raised our voices to each other since I was teenager, except over this!
YOU CAN’T WEAR SNEAKERS!
BUT MOM NO ONE WILL SEE THEM. AND THEY’RE ALMOST FLATS.
YOU WONT FEEL RIGHT
DON’T TELL ME HOW I’M GOING TO FEEL!!
etc.
I wore embroidered Sketchers, hybrid sneaker-flats. Like these, except they were actually embroidered attractively.
I’m not sure South Korea even allows men to renounce their citizenship before they’re served in the military. Also I’ve heard “Eurasian” (ie those with a European parent) males are exempt from the draft; is that really true?
My brother, who was born in the US, renounced his Korean citizenship when he was 18 and therefore did not have to serve in the military. He is still able to come and go as he pleases; he just needs a visa to do so.
The law about mixed-race Koreans is very old-fashioned. It states that if your appearance clearly marks you as half-Korean, you are barred from serving with the Korean military. They’re trying to change it, but who knows when that will happen. That’s a good point though - unless the law changes within the next couple of decades or so, any children we had wouldn’t be allowed to join the Korean army even if they wanted to.
