My programming may be inadequate to the task.
Dr. McCoy: But maybe [Capt. Christopher] could be retrained, re-educated.
Capt. Kirk: Now you’re sounding like Spock.
Dr. McCoy: If you’re gonna get nasty, I’m gonna leave.
THE DOCTOR: (sung to Tuvok and crew to the tune of La donna è mobile):
"Tuvok I understand,
you are a Vulcan man,
you have just gone without,
for seven years about.
Paris please find a way,
to load a hypospray,
I will give you the sign,
just aim for his behind.
Hormones are raging!
Synapses blazing!
It's all so veeeeeeeeeeeryy, illogical!
Illogical! Iiiiiiiiiiiill– Illogical!"Lifeforms! You tiny little lifeforms! You precious little lifeforms! Where are you?
Your world of starship captains doesn’t admit women.
Ladies and gentlemen and invited transgendered species…
Lt. Cmdr. Data: She said I spoiled the joke.
Guinan: Actually, ‘killed’ would have been a better word.
I’m going to have to ask you to refrain from using your imaginations!
There … are … four … lights!
Stella, shut up! I command you to shut up!
That, Miss Lincoln, is simply my cat.
Away! Away, spirit! And let honest men approach.
ODO: Madam, I am not like you! Every sixteen hours, I turn into a liquid!
LWAXANA TROI: I can swim.
… KIRK: Computer, you will not address me in that manner. Compute.
COMPUTER: Computed, dear.
KIRK: Mister Spock, I ordered this computer and its interlinking systems repaired.
SPOCK: I have investigated it, Captain. To correct the fault will require an overhaul of the entire computer system and a minimum of three weeks at a Starbase.
KIRK: I wouldn’t mind so much if it didn’t get so affectionate.
SPOCK: It also has an unfortunate tendency to giggle.
CHRISTOPHER: I take it that a lady computer is not routine.
SPOCK: We put in at Cygnet Fourteen for general repair and maintenance. Cygnet Fourteen is a planet dominated by women. They seemed to feel the ship’s computer system lacked a personality. They gave it one. Female, of course.
CHRISTOPHER: Well, you people certainly have interesting problems. I’d love to stay around to see how your girlfriend works out, but–
I was thinking about the buffalo, Mr. Spock.
Four thousand throats can be cut in one night by a running man.
The revolution is successful, but survival depends on drastic measures. Your continued existence represents a threat to the well-being of society. Your lives means slow death to the more valued members of the colony. Therefore, I have no alternative but to sentence you to death. Your execution is so ordered. Signed, Kodos, governor of Tarsus IV.
Captain Kirk, I will consider it.
You have not experienced Shakespeare until you have read him in the original Klingon.
Poetry, Captain? Non-regulation.