Really. Not good, it makes him look like a 10 year old boy who’s outgrown his “going to church” clothes.
Which sparks my mini-rant.
J Crew is complete crap. You guys make three types of clothes:
Flimsy cotton that wrinkles into a tissue paper ball when within 50’ of a dryer.
“Pre-stressed” clothes that are frayed and faded. Look, I came here to shop because I already have crappy worn out clothes that need replacing. And I don’t need T-shirts with the decal already cracked, faded, and peeling off.
“Relaxed fit” clothes that make me look like a landlord handyman with a khaki fetish. If your stupid faux-loops and faux-pockets could actually hold a pipe wrench then I might wear it as utility clothing…but not for $85.
You people in the audience at the Symphony: QUIET!!! You in the back row: your whispering means the concert is often accompanied by the sounds pssst, ssskk, ssss, and fsssp. It’s like enjoying the symphony from the comfort of the local herpetarium. You who brought your toddler: I’m sure she’s so much smarter and better behaved than other toddlers. Here’s a surprise: her sitting still for two hours is going to be unlikely. And, you whose cell phone rang at a particulary quiet stretch of music: I’m sure that call was so much more important than whatever enjoyment the other 3000 of us might otherwise have received from the music. Perhaps you want the babysitter to be able to get in touch with you. Perhaps you’re a doctor on call. Perhaps it’s your weekend to carry the nuclear football. Fine. But put your fucking phone on vibrate. Afraid you won’t feel it going off? Then cram it up your ass. You’ll fucking feel it then. Prick.
Hardcore, emocore, metalcore, homocore, queercore, sludgemetal, coremetal, hardcore, post-hardcore, pre-hardcore, hard-hardcore, melodic hardcore, harmonic hardcore, anarchpunk, thrash, crust, grindcore, grindthis, grindthat, skate punk, loser punk, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, you fucking wannabe librarian cocksucker. You make music about as cool as butterfly collecting, you little OCD freak. Holy shit, do I hate music people. I hate indie music people more than I hate D&D nerds. When I watched High Fidelity all I could think about was taking a flamethrower to John Cusack’s music store and killing those music nerds in there, watching them burn, haha! I fucking hate all you indie music pussies and your bullshit “look how important I am, I read a zine once” attitude. DIY, dude! Yeah whatever. Your favorite sixteen-year old garage band protege puts in an extra stroke and you have to come up with a whole new genre to justify your tiny, shitty little life and the amount of time you spend on this crap. Someone should beat the fuck out of you just for breathing. Oh, and thick black plastic eyeglasses? Milo can wear those, you can’t because they make you look like the Verizon guy and all I can think about is thick black plastic crsiply snapping when my fist unexpectedly flattens them against your fuckin skull.
Punk, that’s my genre. Retardcore. That’s your fucking genre. Shut up, don’t speak to me. Don’t stand near me. And take those glasses off, you asshole.
I pit myself for not going with my Gut instinct which was to stay away from buying GTA IV. I haven’t liked the other versions and I did much enjoy the first two hours I played over the weekend. I probably won’t play it again which means I wasted $65.
I pit the fuckers who call in asking to speak to my boss then refusing to tell me why. Newsflash assholes, I’m gonna find out anyhow. It’s kinda my job. All you’re doing is causing me to explain to my boss why the fuck I didn’t get a reason for the call.
I pit the dipshits who pulled the rug out from two of our clients. You put my boss in a bad mood for about three weeks and that spills over onto me. On top of that, you’re gonna get your asses sued.
Grraaaarrrgggghhhh! Why does everyone assume I know everything? Now I get to be tech support for one of the office ladies, I’m supposed to know what supplies we have, and the exact breakdown of every order!
I’m just the graphic designer dammit! I design the labels and print them! That’s it!
Windex. I can’t believe the general public is content with this piss poor substitute for decent glass cleaner. Two or three applications are required for even mediocre results. Foaming automtive glass cleaners make this crap look like blue koolaid.
OK, you’ve put me on hold. Fine. You play hold music. Fine. The music is a radio tuned to an “easy listening station”. OK, not my kind of music, but I see why you’ve made that choice. But, please, at least TUNE IN THE STATION! I can barely make out Elton John through the static. See, being on hold is unpleasant already. Why are you making it worse by forcing me to sit through “Daniel my brotywuch8w7 chwbici ssssssssssssss wduv the scars that won’t gqyxaaxxxxxxx”? I actually like that song. My guess is that the radio that provides the hold music is sitting in the telephone switch room, which is likely to be the place with the worst reception in the building. There are probably a number of ways you can solve this problem. So, FUCKING FIX IT!
I can tell you why some people use it - I didn’t know there was a more effective product available. I will now try foaming automotive glass cleaner (I cleaned the inside of my car windows this weekend, and they were greasy looking when I was done - I was not impressed. It’s not like I enjoy cleaning so much I want to do it over again. :mad: )
Why does every goddamn traffic report on television or radio have to be accompanied by loud, distracting music? Not only does it make the information hard to follow (not that I care, since I ride the train to work), but it makes casual listeners like me turn AWAY from your broadcast, you noise-loving jerks.
Oh, and this:
reminded me of a day not long ago when I was listening to the TV from another room and heard a commercial advertising a drug called “Ass Effects.” Did I run eagerly into the TV room to find out more about Ass Effects? You bet I did. Imagine my disappointment when it turned out to be a drug called “AcipHex,” named by someone either very careless or very clever.
Micro the first: communal microwaves. Yes, some people leave messes, etc. but that is rare in my office because it’s hard to get away with. What isn’t rare is people who stop the cycle early by opening the door instead of hitting the Stop button. That means the next user (invariably Me, because it’s all about Me) has to hit that self-same Stop button before I can begin my own microwaving event. Stop!
Micro the second: we have automatic light sensors that turn out office and room lights after a set period of inactivity (I believe these can perceive both motion and sound). So it’s not necessary (you morons) to turn off these lights manually so that I (see above, all about Me) have to turn them on manually instead of just walking in and having them come on magically.
That is all, thank you for your immediate attention to these important lapses of office behavior.
Roddy
And what the hell is up what that Celebrex commercial with the line-drawing-animation style look, where the lines are all text with drug information? You know, the one where the camera zooms in on someone’s arm or something, and it’s just a long line of text? It seems like that commerical is on during every commercial break on Sunday nights. And, I timed it once. It’s 2 minutes and 30 seconds long!! It’s 2:30 of insipid music with drug information being droned out in a soothing monotone. Shut up already! I haaaate that commerical. It’s so long, I wonder if doctors can claim it for continuing education credits.
It sounded like “ass effects” to me too! Reminds me of how KTLA’s station ID anouncements used to say “Tribune Broadcasting in L.A.”, but it sounded like Trivial Broadcasting.
As for drug names, I think we need two tranquilizers, Dammitol and a stronger one named Goddammitol.
Could we make garbage disposals standard in office kitchens? At the first job where I started bringing leftovers for lunch, we had garbage disposals. I thought this was standard to be expected everywhere, somewhat analogous to the story of the family that was so poor that even the maid’s Learjet was secondhand. Of course that job was at a plumbing wholesaler, so they were unusually au courant when it came to outfitting a kitchen.
At every other job I’ve had since, there’s been no garbage disposal. Each afternoon, without fail, I would see people in the kitchen awkwardly scraping out their lunch containers over the trash barrel, so as not to allow any food to go down the drain, and using many paper towels in the process. I don’t have figures on this, but it seems it might actually be more environmentally friendly to run a garbage disposer than to use all that paper.
Certainly it would be quicker and easier, and it makes a lot of sense given that people do like to bring leftovers for lunch.
Ugh! I JUST noticed that my Frye action figure is missing from my desk here at work.
I am not close enough friends with anyone here for it to be a clever kidnapping.
FUCK whoever stole that. It’s not valuable or even that highly prized but I’m pissed that some douchebag would steal a little toy off my desk. Seriously?!
This morning I went out to my car in an almost totally empty parking lot. I came across the leaf-blower guy, who had chosen my vehicle as the nexus of his forced-air-detritus-herding. He had a nice cloud of dust and crap swirling all around my (recently washed) car.
I came up, and he nearly aimed the friggin’ leaf blower at me before thinking better of it. He half mumbled a non-apology, and pointed the thing directly at my car. I waved him off, “That’s enough, you’ve already done a great job!”
He didn’t catch the sarcasm dripping from my half-shouted words…most likely because I was speaking english. I got in my car, and he fired the leaf blower at the car again, and I flipped him off as I drove out of the lot.
The kind I use is repackaged for Chrysler but it’s made by a company called Meguires, the also sell waxs, you might have to find it at an auto parts store, probably a retail outlet like Autozone or Checkers, being in Canada I’m not sure what you have there. It’s better at getting off petroleum based films, like the foggy residue left behind by the plastics in your interior panels when they naturally lose the oils in them.