Which show gratuitously pits half naked, money hungry, would-be TV stars against each other in a free-for-all battle of brains, brawn, and backstabbing? Which show has more tears, petty grudges, and drunken debauchery than every episode of General Hospital to date combined? What is the single greatest game show/ reality TV program ever to grace the boob tube? You guessed it… The Real World/ Road Rules Challenge: The Gauntlet.
Here are my talking points for the first episode:
Tonya, also known as the chick who thought North is whatever direction is directly ahead of you, says that she didn’t get her boob job for sexual reasons. I believe her words were, “Boys had nothing to do with it.” Now normally I would say someone who says something like that is just a bad liar, but in Tonya’s case it’s possible she actually believes her bullshit. Tonya isn’t just a run of the mill bimbo moron, she’s a bubble person too. Unlike say, Trichelle, who is probably aware that of aware of her own mental inadequacies, Tonya lives in her own little fantasy world. Oh and her long time beau Justin is gone? What’s the story there?
Matt, the illegitimate love child of Tammy Faye Baker and Billy Idol, is headed for the chopping block if he doesn’t tuck his morals away for the duration of this trip. Clean leaving and fair play will get you no where with this crew. And, it’s bad enough he doesn’t drink, have sex, or talk shit on a show that’s based on these things, but if he thinks he’s going to spoil everyone else’s fun with his sermonizing he’s got another thing coming.
The Miz, liked him on the show and on last season’s challenge, and he still seems like a funny and warmhearted dude. But, I can’t believe Abram kicked his ass so bad. For a smaller guy he is one tough muther. It’s just a shame his savage beating of that cockknocker Donnel had to be so short.
Coral, still the uber-bitch with the uber-boobs. It was all Trichelle could do to keep her eye’s in her skull when Coral walked out in her bikini… do I smell a lesbian encounter in the making?
Rachel, still seems like a flake (that outfit she wore at the meeting to boot someone to the Gauntlet was definitely stolen from Ellie May’s wardrobe.), but now she is a ridiculously hot flake. Damn she looks like she grew five inches but stayed the same weight. Model-worthy.
Sarah, she was such a wuss on her show that I can understand why she got booted so quickly. But, so far she’s been laughing all her problems off rather than crying about them like last time so I have to give her credit for that. We’ll see if she can keep it up. Appearance wise, I think she looked better when she had a fuller figure.
Nathan, um did anyone else notice that thing on his lip? Somehow I doubt he’ll be getting much action on this trip.
Darell, so far he seems like the most normal, and for lack of a better word, the most like a man. He gives it his all, doesn’t pull punches, and he’s not there to make friends (or enemies). He’s a real competitor. It’s just a shame he’s on a team of whiny, back stabbers, who will inevitably cut their own legs out from under themselves.
