I woke up the other night to the sound of… something inside the wooden wardrobe beside my bed. There was scratching coming from inside the seven foot tall, solid wood structure. Because I was just having a zombie dream, I was a little hesitant about investigating.
“Kitty?” I asked and was greeted with a piteous “mrrow.” I opened the closet-type doors on the top, but didn’t find a cat. Somehow, the cat had teleported through one of the drawers on the bottom into the tiny bit of space between them and the solid wood back. In the middle of the night, I had to wrestle one of the giant, heavy drawers off its rollers so my stupid cat could escape.
I have no idea how she got back there. She’s quite stupid… but awfully genius about it.
Louie, the large fluffy cat that secretly owns our home, has a problem with food. He stuffs his face without chewing his food, then horks it back up. Then he runs back to the food dish to fill his face again. As of this writing he has vomited on nearly every piece of furniture we own, plus on countless shirts, backpacks, you name it.
But last week he surpassed himself in grossness: he puked in the litterbox, while taking a dump. At least it was easy to clean, but ugh! It was not fun to walk around the corner just in time to see the cat shomit.
I have three dogs - one older and scary smart, one elderly and remarkably NOT smart, and one puppy. Margo, the less-than-brilliant one, thinks she should be touching me at all times. She follows me around the house, and if I change direction, she is usually stumbled over or stepped on, or I fall. THis extends to whatever environment we are in - once, outside, we had a bonfire going. It had mostly burned down, but Margo was distressed that somehow I ended up on the far side of the flames, and walked through the bonfire to get to my side. She never made a sound, but i turned around when i smelled burning fur and saw her braving the ruins of the fire to be with her mommy. She was okay, just some paw fur singed.
My darling little special snowflake of a cat, Hai decided a wasp made a good plaything.
She wound up looking like she was wearing a catchers mitt on her front paw (but the big fat foot was gone by the next morning).
Her big sister, Minerva, caught a small bird when she was very small. 'Nervy figured her job was done. Hai ate the bird.
She stretches out very long and likes to be held upsidedown. She kind of arches her back and stretches out into a really long skinny bow. She lets us pass her from person to person while she’s in this position. We call her “the stupid trophy” when she’s like this.
Hai also has all kinds of werd things she does but I’m not sure they’re dumb, like playing fetch with a small rubber chicken, or demanding plastic grocery bags be emptied ASAP so she can climb into them and purr at us. She also crawls under the covers to sleep next to me when she’s cold.
Ah, our last ferret had a problem like that too, but not quite to that extent. She’d bolt her kibble and now and then get some larger piece temporarily stuck in her throat, so we’d hear the sound of her coughing to dislodge it. I’d really get freaked out at first, then reminded myself if she was coughing, she was breathing; eventually I’d just call into the other room, “Stop bolting your food!”
Then every time I had to fast her before bringing her in to the vet, she’d go nuts upon being given food again and just gobble away, guaranteeing a repeat of the coughing during this process. The first time it happened, she gorged herself so much that she puked; since that didn’t happen again I’ll at least give her some credit for that tiny bit of learning.
The thing was, we only fasted her for 4 hours before the visit, so it ended up being maybe 5 hours tops that food wasn’t around. She had kibble constantly available for free feeding otherwise, and I even made sure to encourage her to eat right before starting the fast. :smack:
My ex and I had a cat, Wee-wee. She was Nermal-like cute and just as “smart”. Occasionally a moth would make its way inside and she’d catch it and bat it around, blurbing and chattering. Eventually she’d eat it then start crying and looking around because she couldn’t find it anymore.
Both of my cats are pretty smart (if they see that I’m saying they’re stupid they might kill me) but one time, one of them did try to jump into the mirror to get at a dangly thing. I died laughing.
My dog barks at the front window at any passing human or animal. He will watch me from his window post as I say goodbye and I begin to go out the front door, and then he will immediately start to bark furiously at me as I take my first steps to make my way to the car, not realizing I’m the same person who just left. Often he will begin to bark even before the front door is finished closing.
We’ve only had our pup, Angel, for a week now, and up until this morning everything she did was cute. I found out this morning she loves my lotion, and I can see why: I use a vanilla bean scented cream, and it smells heavenly. Well, I was putting it on my feet this morning, and she started licking my toes. EWWWWW. I had to push the pup away five times before she left my toes alone.
My dog, Max, sits outside on the porch scratching the door when he wants to come in (especially when he thinks cat food is being served on the sly). I open the door for him and he looks up at me all “Oh! Hai! Might I come in?” and hesitates. I mean, he was scratching the hell out of the door yet he still is polite about being invited in. Goofball dog. (I loves him)
Not my pet, but many years ago a buddy of mine had a beagle that was a couple of sandwiches short of a picnic. One time we spent a weekend at his property up in the Sierras. During the summer, there are these huge meat bees there - mean suckers, they don’t bother with their stingers, they just bite you. The dog kept nipping at them, and my buddy kept yelling “Mony, NO! They’re gonna bite you, it’s gonna hurt!”
She finally got one. Much yipping and yelping ensued, and she kept shaking her head to the point we thought she might rattle it right off. We finally got her calmed down, she seemed to be okay. Five minutes later, guess what she was doing?
I don’t remember how many times she got bit that weekend. We tried keeping her in the cabin for a while, but then we had to put up with her howling… finally my buddy just let her do her thing, hoping Mony would learn her lesson. She didn’t.
The door to outside swings outward and there is a wall that it meets when it’s open halfway. So my puppy wants to be let in and I open the door. She invariably gets stuck between the open door and the wall and can’t figure out what to do. She’s small enough to go under it, but that never occurs to her. She could also easily walk around it, but that doesn’t occur either. She just gets stuck and looks bewildered, until I walk all the way around the door to rescue her. Every time.
My cat Pi does this but he will re-eat the food if I don’t clean it up fast enough. And since his puke is still good then the other cat’s must be, too, except when they vomit it’s due to hairballs and he tries to eat the hai…I can’t even type it, I’m gagging.
Dog eats cat poop, not that unusual but my dog also likes to eat cat poop in the comfort of her bed. I pick up the bed and some hardened, litter covered turds fall out.
A couple of weeks I was on the porch with my ecclectus. He was pacing back forth on the railing as usual when he was startled by a dog. He jumps and instead of flying into the living room (the door was open), he flies into the direct path of the dog.
