My husband and I are sorting thru his mother’s framed photos to hang them for her as a surprise. What surprised me was how many were of his middle brother and his family - easily twice as many as of our little family. And no, I’m not jealous or upset, just surprised.
And it got me to thinking about one of my sisters who sent us framed photos of her 2 kids every year. I have nothing against my sister or her kids, and it was pre-email days, so not weird that she’d want to share their school photos, but dang - framed and all? As if I had a gallery dedicated to her offspring? Is that terribly snarky of me? Is it really awful that a couple of years ago when I was sorting thru photos, I tossed those, among others?
It’s almost, but not quite, in the same category as acquaintances who have family photo Christmas cards. Yeah, I toss them at the end of the season, but it almost feels like a crappy way to treat them. I have one sitting on my end table right now from one of my daughter’s high school friends. It was nice seeing her and her family, but I certainly don’t intend to stick it on my fridge like I do with pics of my grandkids.
Long way around the barn here, but how do you feel about getting photos, framed or not, of other people’s kids? Do you display them? Put them in a drawer? Trash them? Or do people even do that in this email-with-attachments day? I’ll happily peruse your Facebook gallery and make appropriate comments. But I prefer to be spared hard copies.
I’m 100% with you! I grew up in a photo-free house, until my siblings started having sprogs. Then the professional family photos started appearing, which my mother felt obliged to display. It got so much that she dug out an old graduation photo of mine to display too as she felt bad that I didn’t feature anywhere. I know she felt it was tacky.
My friend (finally) gave birth at the age of 43 and sent us an enormous framed photo of her naked baby - yes, totally naked, done in a photographer’s studio, lying on a blanket, in black and white. The baby photo is, like, life-sized. We keep it in a drawer and have a minor panic whenever she’s due to visit to remember to put it out on the shelf. We forgot once, she noticed, and we had to make up some story about having just redecorated.
Me, too. The impact of technology on photography has left me completely out of the loop on where “family photos” belong in our current culture. When folks whip out their phones to show the person seated next to them dozens of indistinguishable shots I get the fuck out of room. I’m ok with photo holiday cards, but framed? Sheesh.
Yeah, the Holiday greeting photos. Some have the whole family and maybe pets, posed somewhere, and others just their kids. I am not sure what it all conveys, I mean, my friends and their families, sure, but just their kids? They all arrive via snail-mail and not framed, so no guilt in tossing them after being on our mantle for a couple weeks.
And what happened to the accompanying Holiday update letter, as now it seems it’s just a photo. You know, the annual family glurge about how well everyone is doing, promotions, vacations, how successfull and well-adjusted the kids are doing in school and their sports, etc. Have people gotten lazy or forgot how to write? How am I supposed to know how wonderful and amazing everything is?
I went through a phase where I thought that framed professional photos of my kids were the perfect Christmas gift for my mom. At the time she lived in a big house where she could display them, but I think now most of these things are packed away in boxes.
I gave some to Grandma too; those are out on display. Her house is pretty much a shrine to all of her relatives. All the walls are covered with pictures of family. The sad thing is she doesn’t remember many of their names anymore.
Anyway, I now think it was very presumptuous of me to think even the kids’ grandparents would want such bulky, useless things, no matter how gracefully they were accepted.
One of my favorite things is the wifi picture gizmo my son gave me that displays whatever he uploads. It’s all the pictures of his family that he wants to share in a single frame, very efficient.
My daughter and her cousin gave one of these to my mom for just that reason. But after the first month or so, everyone seemed to lose interest and there are no recent photos on it.
I’m OK with my daughter giving me pics of the grands - they’re such adorable kids anyway! But my niece and nephew and subsequent generations? Just email me, thanks.
As kids our parents weren’t big picture-takers. So we never developed the habit. So never sent pics of us anywhere for any occasion, and rarely received any. So I have a hard time imagining someone thinking of giving a gift of framed pix of themselves and/or their family. Why? WTF do you expect me to do with that?
Back when snail-mail Christmas cards were a thing, we’d get a few with pix of some random friend couple & their sprogs & dogs. Nice to see, pitched without a thought come January.
Nowadays I get two Christmas cards. One from somebody I didn’t tell I had moved, and I expect this year’s will be the last thanks to USPS. Not much connection there anymore.
The other, oddly enough, is an old friend / retired co-worker who always sends the family holiday pic. Used to be them in their 40s and two tweens. Now it’s 70yo them, the two 40-ish kids & two spouses, and their 5 collective grandsprogs, the eldest in junior high. Nice to see, but pitched without a thought come January.
Years ago my gf stumbled upon old pictures she had taken. She was showing me pictures of horses and dogs she had before we knew each other. It was kind of cool seeing what the property looked like back when trees that are now huge were first planted.
Then I saw a picture of a guy who was incredibly handsome. If Tom Selleck or Tom Cruise at their peak was a 5/10, this guy was a 9.5.
Turns out it was her ex-husband, who I’d never met. I must have one helluva personality.
Because my gf is in advertising, we get some pretty unique picture cards at xmas from the creative folks. Some are pretty subtle. I looked at one for a few minutes before seeing that the guy’s zipper was down and his wife had spinach between her teeth. One guy paid a professional glamour shot photographer to do pictures of him, an overweight dude in his late 40s (done tastefully) staring seductively at the camera, holding mistletoe.
One year her company hired child talent and photographed them as a group. They then took head shots of all the employees and put them on the kids’ bodies. Wish we’d saved that one, it was hilarious.
I’m strange. I shared, with interested folks pix of my kids. Not a lot.
But, I collect old pictures. Not antique or historical pix. Just random family snapshots of people I don’t know. I love to find them at junk stores and fleas.
I cut them up for collage.
I often look at them for a day or two and try to figure out what their deal is. Kind of a weird pursuit.
Yeah, I’m kinda bored.
If you send me pix of your family, kid or pets it’s liable to be in art. If I get famous after my demise they might hang in a gallery some day. There’s always that hope.
A friend from college once sent me a photo of his little girl. I sent it back to him having replaced her head with that of her stuffed frog using a little Photoshop magic. I thought it was at least mildly amusing, but I’m not sure he really dug it.
About all we got were school photos of nieces/nephews when they were that age. We gave same to our parents and - sometimes - to sibs. We’d generally stick them in our photo albums, but then, years later, we’d forget who was who, and generally discard them. And some folk send xmas card photos.
The worst incident was when one family from Alaska was visiting and asked to see old photos. On one page we laughingly remarked on the anonymous photo we referred to as “the ugly baby photo.” You got it! One niece blurted out, “That’s ME!”
Other than grandparents and their grandkids, I don’t know that I’ve ever seen anyone displaying framed photos of kids other than their own. And everyone I can think of who used to have a wall-o-school pics of their own kids eventually pared them down.removed them some time after the kids were out of the house.
We’re a picture family. Pictures have always been a big deal. We all (mom & sisters) have loads of picture albums.
I have a wall in my living room that is covered in pictures - kids’, grandkids’, nieces’ and nephew’s school/graduation pictures, and other family pictures. My sisters and mom also have the same on their walls.
I love getting Christmas card pictures from friends and family. I send them out too. The cards have pictures of me and my husband with the grandkids and the dogs. I’d much rather get the pictures than just a card with a signature inside.
My family of origin is very much not a photo family. So much so that to my knowledge only four photos exist of me between the ages of 14 and 24 - one taken by my first high school boyfriend (who certainly took more , but I only have one ) , my graduation photo, one that my aunt took at her house (which she recently sent me) and a single photo taken by my mother. I have school photos of all my nieces and nephews but if a sibling or in-law sent me framed photos of their kids I would think it was strange- I have photos of the nieces and nephews and their kids but they are in albums or on my phone , not on the walls. There are one or two framed photos that include my nieces/nephews and/or their kids but they are non-professional group photos that also include my kids and/or grandchildren. For example, all of my mother’s grandchildren or all of her great-grandchildren.
I consider myself part of the “elder millennial” generation, and no one has ever mailed me photos of their kids. My friends just flood my Facebook feed with pictures of their kids. Of at least they did back when Facebook’s algorithm prioritized posts from your actual friends rather than random “recommended” posts.
My parents did display a bunch of framed photos of their nieces and nephews (my cousins) in addition to pictures of my sister and me.
I saw a nice picture frame for sale once. The picture in the frame was an attractive young lady. I purchased the frame and hung it with the picture it came with.
For years everyone thought she was a girl from my past. During a move I tossed the picture and reused the fram for a more legitimate purpose.
But my niece and nephew and subsequent generations? Just email me, thanks.
