In this ep, part of Buttons’ ‘interview’ is going down a list of famous people who have never been on "The Tonight Show,’ with a pithy wisecrack about each one.
He mentions Joseph Cotton. "You know how Joseph Cotten got his name? [edited out response].
I thought to myself, what could the answer have been that they would have overdubbed the response, since one of his previous names was. . .
“Abraham Lincoln–who thought that freeing the slaves would be good for basketball.”
Pretty easy to find out what Buttons said, since I doubt that was the first time he’d done that particular shtick. The answer to the Joseph Cotten question? Sammy Davis Jr. picked it
I remember a joke by Glen Campbell where he told the whole joke and they censored the punchline. You know that at that moment what you were saying about the NBC censors was worse than anything that would come out of Glen Campbell’s mouth.
There’s local radio station that plays comedy routines and sometimes they have to be so heavily censored that it is impossible to follow any of the material. It makes me wonder why they bothered airing the segment at all.
I heard a story from my uncle about Gypsy Rose Lee being on the Tonight Show (he said Carson, but I don’t think the dates match up). She was going to demonstrate some of her old burlesque moves and asked the band’s drummer to give her “the beat.”
“What beat?” he asked.
“Y’know, the beat. The one they do in all the burlesque clubs.”
“Ma’m,” the drummer replies, “I’ve never been to one.”
She’s incredulous. “A grown man like you, never been to a burlesque show??” Shaking her head, she adds, “Wouldn’t you know it, I get a BLEEEEEEEP for a drummer!”
The audience howls. The host falls out of his chair laughing.
What in Og’s name did she say? Or did this actually happen? (as I said, I’m getting this second hand…)
I was watching Carson one night* when Carol Wayne and Rodney Dangerfield were among the guests. At one point, Johnny asked Carol what her measurements were.
“38–24–36,” she replied. Then, indicating her boobs, “These aren’t my brains, you know.”
Carson said, “If those are your brains, you’re Einstein!”
And Rodney said, “Hey, she’s Einstein. Last night, I went out with a girl who was retarded!”
Couldn’t get away with this today.
*I was still living “at home” at the time, so this would have been around 1974.
Art Fleming recounted an episode of “Jeopardy” in which the answer was “If you believe in fairies, then you believe in me.”
Obvious question is “Who is Tinker Bell?”
Contestant’s response was muted, but according to Fleming, after the mute, you could hear the audience howling in laughter at the question “Who is Liberace?”
There was a game show called “Jackpot” hosted by Geoff Edwards back in the early 1970s. One of the questions was “What type of dance might you expect a Playboy Playmate to do.”
Correct answer: “Bunny Hop”
Contestant’s muted answer, according to Edwards, “The hora.”
Probably because it tangentally had something to do with religion, over which censors back then were especially uptight. They could have been afraid of offending people in the Bible Belt, like they were with Mr Spock in 1966. (“He looks too much like the Devil!”)
In a strange twist, one night in the mid-1980s Carson told the “W.C.” joke. Not a hint of irony or winking about it; he just did a (shorter) version of it in his post-monologue segment with Ed. If the Paar incident was known to me (I’d read some book about the Tonight Show), it surely was well known to Carson.
I sent Carson a note asking about it but never got a reply.
I watched JC one night when he had a male-female comic duo on. Some sort of psychology book had come out and they set up the premise that they were on a blind date and had both read the book. For about four minutes it was both deferring to the wishes of the other during the date. “Where do you want to go?” “Anywhere you want to is fine with me.” “No, I insist it’s someplace you’d like.” and so on. It was mildly amusing but obviously setting something up for the finish.
Then they’re at the end of the date, shaking hands good night and --bam!-- not only the audio is killed, but the video goes black for a good four seconds. When it comes back, the duo does a quick bow and trots off backstage, and the audience is howling. Tom Smothers and Tiny Tim were on the couch and the three of them (including JC) are literally sitting stunned with mouths open.* It’s the only time I remember Carson being flummoxed more than a moment. Then Tommy gets this incredible grin on his face and says, “Boy! They’d never let us get away with that on our show!” What “that” might have been was never discussed, of course, and I’ve wondered from time to time what it was.
*TT’s eyes were doing this weird sort of flutter as well.
I’ll bet it was something along the lines of the “Oh, I see you’ve noticed my little white dot!” joke, or the “Officer, when I turned around my wallet was gone and five pounds was missing!” sketch:
[spoiler] **HE: **So, you wanna fuck?
SHE: Yeah, alright. [/spoiler]
They’d have to cut the video in this case, because that would be just too easy to lip-read.
If Tiny Tim was on the show, that would place it around 1969, probably too late for May and Nichols. Maybe Stiller and Meara? :dubious:
Tom Smothers and Tiny Tim were on this July 10, 1968 ep with an improv group called ‘The Committee,’ so that’s probably the sketch. However, identifying exactly who was in The Committee at the time, and which members might have been on the program is probably a daunting task 50 years later.
Given what Lenny Bruce was saying around that time, I’d go with the “f” word.
But while I was reading the situation, I was thinking of another type of beating that probably went on in those clubs…
Very impressive troupe, including Howard Hesseman and Barbara Bosson. The one that stands out to me, though, is Leigh French, who did the “Share a Little Tea with Goldie” bits on The Smothers Brothers Comedy Hour.
The first person I thought of was actually Patty Deutsch, but it turns out she was in the Ace Trucking Company improv group.
