Euphemism–children with poor aim.
Proscenium–
–The Element of Style.
Wharf.
Wharf: (Slang) to vomit loudly.
Mangetout, we need a new word!
Oops:
Category
Category: A figurative comparison involving felines.
Salivate
Salivate — to drool over bargains at the mall
bamboo
A guy who has sex with a woman and criticises her performance afterwards.
Malleable.
Adjective, describing property or land that is suitable for the construction of a retail mall. (Possibly after descruction of residences currently on the site.)
Register
Register–Someone who habitually misunderstands things the first time around, but who eventually catches on after repeated attempts at comprehension.
Costume
Costume: When we both pay for something, we share the cost between u and me.
Inflammable
That one made me laugh 
Inflammable. A beat signature not playable on a drum.
Sodalite
Sodalite: Any of a variety of carbonated beverages sweetened with Aspartame or Sucralose.
Ostensible
Sodalite when the lawn is on fire, origin was sod alight.
banal
Sodalite: Noun. 1.: A primitive illumination device made by using a bottle of Clearly Canadian or other carbonated beverage as a candle holder. 2: A follower of the religious leader, Sodal. Sodal founded a small subsect of Pastafarianism, which claims that the deity is, in fact, the Gliding Lo Mein Being, rather than the Flying Spaghetti Monster. Ordering the Chow Fan, rather than the Fettuccini Alfredo, is considered a sacrament. There has been much strife between the two factions, with known instances of members of one sect throwing meatballs or wontons at members of the other. Some Pastafarians and Sodalists have worked together to bridge the rift between the two sects, however, claiming that all starch is sacred.
All right, enough of that. Maybe we should start a new thread, where people write brief, completely made-up Wikipedia articles. But I digress…
Scissors.
Ostensible: A pencil drawing of the likeness of an ostrich.
Amusing
Brain cancer caused by spending too much time on the Chamber of Secrets forums.
glutinous
Amusing: Adj. Anything that drives away artistic or creative inspiration.
Velcro
Rats.
Never mind!
I like glutinous, Shoshana.
Glutinous–Adj. Improving the muscles in the human behind.
Banal–Adj.–Having kind of, sort of to do with the colon, but not so much.
And I think that puts us back at “velcro.” Unless someone else has answered, of course.