Hi everyone,
Just wondering what you think of this situation. I have recently started avoiding one of my close friends because I don’t want to get mixed up in his mess. However, I would still like to know if my thoughts on this situation are to pessimistic and judgmental. I don’t think so, but I know my friend would so am avoiding the whole subject.
Anyway, he started dating a girl two or so months ago whom he met at work after dumping his current girlfriend a week before hand. She just turned 21 and he is 31. Withing a week of dating they were already saying how much they loved each other and picking out baby names. Her parents hate him. They think she has changed for the worst since meeting him. She came from a strict catholic family and since she was still living at home her parents expected her to obey their rules such as being home by a certain time. My friend can’t stand her parents and has let her know how he feels about her family. So, she started pushing for more freedom. Well, things got pretty bad as she started fighting with her parents about her BF and just last week left to move in with him.
Now, my friend doesn’t live alone. He lives with his father and brother who is 30. His father claims he really likes his girlfriend and she seems to like his family too. She stated a couple of days after moving in that it is so much better living there then with her parents. My friend and her believe that the situation is great. However, I view my friend as someone desperate for love and only became interested in the girl once she showed interest in him and that’s when he dumped his current girlfriend and went for her. Also, moving in with someone you have only dated for two months seems like a potential disaster since most people are probably still in the honeymoon phase of the relationship. My friends GF was very close to her family before my friend came along. She is a college student and was living at home and was planning on transferring to a university away from home this May. She seemed like she was really looking forward to going to that particular university since there were others she could have chosen instead. Now she is looking into transferring to the local university so she can remain close to my friend and live with his family.
This seems like a disaster waiting to happen to me. I know my friend and his GF think everything will be fine but living together means you’ll end up seeing all aspect of a person good and bad. Also, since they are living with his family there will be less privacy and space and eventually she will not be treated as a guest anymore and will start to be treated like everyone else. Being that she is still very young and my friend is her first serious BF I wonder if perhaps she just wanted to get away from her parents and is idealizing the situation. To me this doesn’t seem like a relationship that can last very long.