And no, I dont have a vibrator. But please, share stories about yours!
Mine is with my Broadsword. You’ll all be introduced to him soon, once I get some pics flowing. His name is T’ton, and he’s a work of art.
Now, I have a few rules regarding T’ton. First, I am the only one allowed to wield him. By wield, I mean, basically, to hold him in a battle-ready position and/or swing him about. Second, noone, and I mean NOONE is allowed to touch his blade. The only things that ever touch his blade are the polish, the polish cloth, and his sheath. That’s it, with VERY rare exception. Even I never touch the blade with my bare hands.
I have these rules because I feel very close to him. I’m a born warrior, and the second I held T’ton I felt a very strong sense of belonging, like we were meant to be together.
Now, I regularly show off my collection to friends who happen to be over. And I always tell them the same thing. They may play with any of the weapons in my room, but they are, under no circumstances, to touch T’ton, and I point him out when saying this. Usually I reiterate this several times.
Today, someone crossed that line.
He reached out, and before I could stop him, ran his fingers along T’ton’s edge.
Immediatly, I felt several things. First of all, rage. Second, I felt very, very violated. And third, it actually hurt a little bit.
I roared at him and ordered him out, and rapidly whipped out the polish to clean the contamination off. I polished the entire blade to a spotless sheen, and polished his brass guard for good measure. It took a good half hour before I started to feel clean again, and was comfortable replacing him in his spot on the wall. For several hours afterward, I felt very uneasy, and slightly nauseous.
Now, I had known that my relationship with my sword was close, but this I did not expect. I know it was more than likely all in my mind, but still, I hated it. I couldnt stand it. So, apparantly T’ton is closer to me than I had thought.
So like, am I nuts? I felt violation. I felt pain. I refer to my sword as ‘he’ rather than ‘it’.
Also, does anyone else have a relationship like this with something that’s not really alive? I feel like he’s part of me. A lot of people would (and are going to, I bet) say I’m crazy.