Judaism, The Energizer Religion[sup]TM[/sup]: 4000 years, and we keep going and going and going…
Christianity, The Bargain Religion[sup]TM[/sup]: Looking for gods? Come see our fabulous three-in-one deal!
The Zen Buddhism[sup]TM[/sup] advertising jingle: “If you’re Zen and you know it, clap one hand…”
(And, of course, there’s the old joke about atheism being a non-prophet organization).
I once answered my phone with “Westboro Baptist Church: You kick it, we picket”.
Edit for clarification: I’m not actually with WBC.
I;m going to have to tell this joke to some of my friends. I live in Topeka, and my church gets picketed by the WBC once a month. In the early 90’s I used to do a lot of counter-picketing against them. Good times.
Atheism: No rules, no meetings, no tithes, no guilt. Pasta and (Darwin)Fish dinners optional.
Hinduism : Gobs and Gobs of Gods ! If one god is good, more is better !
Huitzilopochtlism : The religion with a heart ! Lots of them !