Remakes you actually want to see

Cafe Society
1

The 4th version of A Star is Born is now in theaters; and I’ve just seen teaser trailers for Dumbo and Aladdin (Disney seems intent on remaking live versions of their cartoons…). In recent years we’ve seen the 4th version of King Kong (counting Skull Island), 3rd version of Ben-Hur and 3rd version of Godzilla.

(I’m not counting sequels, or franchise re-boots)

What would you like to see next? We haven’t had a Beau Geste since Marty Feldman’s “Last Remake of Beau Geste”…I could get into a good Foreign Legion movie.

2

The Ghost Goes West ?

3

I was just browsing through Amazon, and realized that The Island of Dr. Moreau has been done three times (Charles Laughton, Burt Lancaster, Marlon Brando)…the last two of which were not particularly good.

4

I would like to see a remake of A Chorus Line that follows the plot of the original Broadway show. The movie changed some things, like the context of “What I Did for Love,” and turned it into a romantic ballad. The song was supposed to be about what I did for the love of DANCING.

But the MOST offensive thing about the movie is that you never got to see the whole dance number (“One”) that the cast had spent the whole movie learning. Like with many dance performances on screen (I’m lookin’ at you Riverdance!) there were cuts every couple of seconds, lots of close-ups, and very few long shots. Absolutely infuriating.

5

I, uh, thought that was the whole point.

6

Here are a few I’d like, as I think I’ve said before:

1.) A version of A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur’s Court that didn’t wimp out, wasn’t a star vehicle, and managed to actually capture Twain’s off-kilter wit.

2.) I, Robot done faithfully to Asimov, ideally using Harlan Ellison’s script (and lots of CGI)

3.) Heinlein’s The Puppet Masters done in its proper period setting, with a good sense of the proper eeriness.

4.) This Island Earth done by someone who’s actually read the book, and without the exposed-brain Mutants, a destroyed Metaluna, etc. They can change the ending, if they want – it was the weakest part of the book, but a version that actually explained the meaning of the title (and why that’s important) would be good.

5.) H.P. Lovecraft’s The Case of Charles Dexter Ward. done straight.

6.) Fredric Brown’s Arena. I’ve filmed this one in my head. It has to be one of the most ripped-off stories ever, with Star Trek and The Outer Limits strip-mining it, but the original story , especially with modern CGI, would be great. Bonus points for filming it without having recourse to voice-overs.

Just about anything by H.G. Wells, Jules Verne, Edgar Allen Poe, or H.P. Lovecraft, in fact. Just about everything based on their works has changed them so completely that the point and the feeling are lost. In particular I’d like to see:

7.) The Time Machine by Wells, done so that you not only had the far-future scenes that no version has included, but also making the point about what the Eloi andf Morlocks really were. If you think the Morlocks are subhuman monsters preying on the wonderful Eloi, you’ve missed the point completely.

7

I’d like to see a Breakfast at Tiffany’s that was accurate to the novella–an 18-year-old call girl and her gay neighbor and no romantic ending. (Still set in the original time period.)

8

I used to love an old movie from the late 60’s called Valley of Gwangi about cowboys discovering a lost valley with living dinosaurs. When I was a kid, I loved me some dinosaurs. I’m sure with today’s skills this could be a great remake.

9

Me, too. :mad:

10

“The Incredible Shrinking Man”…maybe. A lot of potential there but I think they’d blow it.

11

I have tentative positive hopes for the Veronica Mars reboot.

12

I wouldn’t mind seeing Battlefield Earth and Running Man done true to the books.

13

I’d like to see a John Waters helmed Pink Flamingos remake.

Rosie O’Donnell could reprise the Divine role.

Ryan Reynolds and Katie Holmes could be the evil couple.

And, of course, Kathleen Turner as Edie the Egg Lady.

14

I thought it was pretty awesome with '60s technology. Ray Herryhausen was my idol.

15

I would like to see a reboot of Highlander franchise. Take elements of the original film (which I love, btw), and add the mythology of the tv show.

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16

I’d like to see an English version of the stage musical Dance o the Vampires done in the style of the original German version of Tanz der Vampire. The German show ran for over five years in various venues. The totally messed up English version lasted 56 performances and casting Michael Crawford in the lead instead of Germany’s Steve Barton was a total disaster.

17

That sounds cool. Me, I have a morbid curiosity about the inevitable remake of The Matrix. It’s almost been 20 years now, so in the next decade or so I expect someone will want to give it a go.

18

I’d like to see high-budget costume drama TV series of “An American Tragedy” and “The Newcomes”.

19

Not a remake, but: one of my most beloved films of all time is the 1956 Moby Dick, with Gregory Peck. It’s only flaw is the special effects: MD himself has some issues (his jaw kind of flops open and closed), and it has the problem inherent in all nautical films – putting a miniature ship in a tank of water doesn’t look right, because water drops don’t miniaturize.

So I’d re-release the film with CGI sequences.

20

I’d like to see Babylon 5 re-done in a style more like Battlestar Galactica or The Expanse and less like Star Trek.