Me, every single day.
As long as you know that your baby does truly love you, then I have nothing more to say. I am currently the favorite parent of Daughter. I suspect its because I’m more laid back than Husband. I become the least favorite parent every time she needs her hair washed though.
My rant for today is that I puked this morning. This is to be expected as a pregnant lady. But I just really really fucking hate vomiting. I feel like I lose all control of my bodily functions. On top of that, I brushed my teeth extra well, because vomit, and then made myself nauseated again. So I don’t even get the relief. I’m so happy to be pregnant, but morning sickness can fuck right off.
I’m shocked. For once, the crazy lady (my mother) and her paranoia was accurate! And I get to figure it out (that is the rant). I’m sorry, it’s going to be long.
My parents bought their cabin back in 1978. When they bought the property, it included the plot the cabin was on straight across the dirt road and about 20’ on the other side of the road - most of us used it as where we parked our vehicles. Behind that was all farmland. Pretty simple. One property ID number.
In 2004ish, the farmer sold his land, and people along the lake were allowed to buy parcels back about 200’ from where the original property ended, basically extending our parking lot a ways back. When all of this was being surveyed, it was discovered a wedge shaped piece on the cabin side of the road was owned by the farmer. It was weird, but my parents rolled it into the purchase of what we call the “back 40”. Now there was three property IDs: The cabin, the wedge, the back 40.
Fast forward to about 2015. Somehow, this wedge of property was being contested by the heirs of the farmer. A bit of a legal battle ensued, as the sale was not recorded correctly by the county. It was decided by the courts that, yes, mom (dad was gone by then) did own the wedge.
Last week, she went up there to find her property had been surveyed. Stakes all over, some spray paint on the ground. She, of course, freaked out. Everyone from her the neighbors on both sides, the guy down the road who really wants her cabin, the real estate guy further down the road, hell, even her cousins that she hasn’t spoken with in over a decade were all responsible.
Yesterday, she drove up to the courthouse to try and figure it out. Of course, like many offices since March, hardly anyone was available. She was told “We don’t know, you should try here…” multiple times. After driving to various far flung county offices, she ended up calling the town hall in the incorporated town the cabin is technically in and was told the farmer still owns some of her property, maybe it was them.
Cue absolute freak out. I looked online and confirmed that yeah, there is a strip about 7’ wide that runs across the entire property between the wedge and the road on the cabin side that is somehow still owned by the farmer’s family. You would’ve thought that with the litigation over the wedge it would’ve been discovered, but obviously not.
She can’t deal with it. She is in absolute misery, trying to figure out where to come up with money to buy this strip of property we always thought was ours. The litigation over the wedge ruined any relationship she had with the farmer’s family, so talking with them is pointless, and with her mental issues, I would not want her to speak with them. She’d probably blame them for kidnapping Lindberg’s baby.
I guess I am lucky that she trusts me to handle this, as in every other aspect of my life she treats me as if I am a fragile, slightly challenged 5 year old. To be honest, I think I’m the only one left that she does trust, and I do have some guilt as I normally blow off her paranoid theories. So now I get to go down the property rabbit hole to figure out wtf happened and how to fix it.
Our Sooper God-Fearing neighbors across the way have brought in a “professional” crew to install their Xmas lighting. They’re climbing ladders up to the roof to install Gawd knows what.
I’m envisioning something reminiscent of the closing credits from “Rocky & Bullwinkle”, with added Jesus.
Seriously. It’s like having viral gastroenteritis for three (or more) months. I’m not sure how far along you are, but I hope your suffering is brief.
Oh my gosh, Miss Take, that is not gonna be fun.
I have a friend that dealt with a similar situation several years ago.
Her issue was that a survey found her next door neighbor owned part of her very long driveway.
I must admit I’m having trouble visualizing the situation you describe, but it sounds like the farmer owns a swath of land that cuts through the middle of your property.
My friend negotiated a land swap with her neighbor and traded that section of her driveway for an equivalent square footage of land on the other side of the property. This was land she never used and didn’t have plans for, and her neighbor wanted the additional pasture space, so it all worked out and no one had to buy anything - although there were some administrative charges on the transaction.
If she doesn’t want to give up the 7’ swath you described, is there another part of the property she might not mind giving up? Possibly something at the edge of the property line?
I don’t know if this would work out in your situation, but it worked out for my friend.
It runs the entire width east to west of her property, basically a 80’ x 7’ strip running between the road and the cabin. Should the farmer’s family decide to be assholes, it would prevent her from accessing the cabin unless she goes through the neighbor’s yards.
Unfortunately, her mental health issues have alienated her neighbors, so I doubt they would be okay with her traipsing through.
Looking at Beacon, it’s weird. If I click on the strip of land, it’s tied in with the rest of whatever land that family still owns, which is no longer near her property. Someone else owns approximately 300’ beyond the back 40, then the farmer’s family land picks back up. The neighbors own everything east and west.
What I’m hoping is the assessor can figure out what the true tax liability for just that little strip would be and we offer them retro payment back to when the back 40/ wedge was dealt with- and that they will accept it. Considering the wedge is larger and costs a whole $6/year in taxes… a person can hope.
IANAL, but I’m pretty sure that (at least in MO) that there is a general right-of-access to your property, meaning that if you or your mom drive/walk directly across the strip it is allowed.
My belief here is based on a long, slow worry in our HOA where at some point we forgot to pay taxes on a bit of greenspace on the edge of the development, and someone picked it up for the back taxes. The worry is that the guy who now owns it will demand access (meaning potentially a driveway through some existing owned lots). No idea if that is an actual worry or just people being paranoid.
MissTake, your neighbor should look into Prescriptive Rights. If the land has been used for a certain number of years and the farmer knew this, she should have basically an easment to continue to do so. This varies by state. A good way to prove how long it has been in use is old aerial photos that may be available from county government. We get these kinds of requests at the county I work for pretty often.
“openly, obviously, and without permission”
As enipla said, it varies by State but that criteria for easements is pretty universal, just the length of time varies.
Where did he go it’s like he’s all of a sudden irrelevant! So I hate to admit this but I’m slightly missing a daily fix of the anxiety producing antics of the cheatolini. I know he’s out there somewhere lying, crying, he’s no longer newsworthy. I need a news detox.
Ah, land ownership. When my grandfather passed away in the early '90s, my mother inherited a few chunks of farmland. This farmland was part of a USDA program which essentially pays farmers not to farm; this was incentive enough for my parents to keep the land. Fast forward a decade or so, and there’s a convenience store chain that’s very interested in this previously rural farmland, so they decide to sell. It took a further five years to convince Halifax County that the land had been sold, no further payments were being received from the USDA, and that neither my mother nor her deceased father had their name on any property in the county. At one point, I was even mailing them printouts from their own property records/tax website regarding the property in question.
From The Guardian Politics Blog:
Putting Trump past us is like exiting an abusive relationship: it takes time, Amil Niazi writes:
There are certainly many parallels between the end of Donald Trump’s presidency and a psychologically violent relationship. Think about the temper tantrums, the refusal to accept reality, mood swings, fear of reprisal and a sense of looming danger: all are hallmarks of controlling and abusive behavior.
Farrah Khan is a gender-based violence expert and member of the government of Canada’s Advisory Council on the Strategy to Prevent and Address Gender-Based Violence – and she echoes how Trump’s time in office has often mirrored domestic violence.
“Throughout his time in office, Trump would belittle communities, enact state violence through policies, act out in vengeful ways when he felt slighted and cut off access to supports or protections, isolating communities from each other,” she tells me. “I feel that under Trump many of us had a collective hypervigilance and anxiety of what he might do next. This has shown up in things like night terrors or constantly scrolling on social media for real or perceived threats from him to your community.”
So you’re not alone.
I’m dealing with hospital stuff and our daughter almost dying and colleges and her catching up with school, and you call… not to even ask how she is doing as a preamble to asking me for money (like you did when she and I were in the hospital), but just to rant at me about how every decision you’ve made since you decided to walk out on me has made your life worse and how you’ve started doing fucking METH now?
And this MORNING now I have you asking me for money… “for gas money to get to a job interview”… Gee, I totally believe you! And I also know that I’ll do it. You know that too.
For the 900th time, I am telling myself to cut off all contact, but… the kids.
He’s taking credit for the Dow breaking 30K.
If I recall correctly, both of your kids are in high school. You know how they’d react best, but it might be good to sit down with them and discuss the situation. They may decide they’re better off without her, letting you cut off contact without guilt.
Either way, tell her no money and that you don’t have it to spare because you have medical bills to deal with.
Since we’re ranting, let me tell you I feel your pain. Sorry about all this.
I supported by ex for 5 years, including child support, huge spousal maintenance, money for a new pickup, and a down payment for a house. At times I was living off credit cards to do this. Yet she told my kids she was supporting me, and that my girlfriend (now wife) was freeloading off of her. My kids were resentful to their stepmother and I suspected their mother was sabotaging the relationship, but I would never have guessed she was saying this. 10 years later, my kids have seen who they can rely on and who they can’t.
Wow! There’s certainly some wisdom here. Explains a lot for me.
Yeah, it’s time to talk to the kids about whether they really want Methhead Mom in their lives.
I’m so sorry she prioritizes herself over those babies.