Remember to do the obvious things.

Hmm, I think I’ll make this bbq rib sandwich.

I read the instructions carefully - Remove packaging. Prepare contents on a microwaveable plate, Microwave on full power for 1 minute 70 seconds.

Having followed these instructions I watch the microwave humming away for 1 minute and 60 seconds. Then, for no apparent reason, I turn round, and see, on the kitchen top (a good metre away from the microwave) - the sandwich - packaging removed, contents prepared.

I just spent 1 minute 60 seconds watching a microwave cook nothing!

Remember to do the obvious things.

When I was picking the meat off the turkey carcass yesterday (first turkey I ever cooked, thankyouverymuch), guess what I found in the neck cavity? The SECOND bag of giblets. I had removed the bag with the neck in it from the body cavity, and figured that was the only one. Didn’t know there was a second bag . . . At least nobody got sick from the baked plastic. . . .

Our only other goof was finding in the microwave, at 10 pm, the corn that was supposed to have been served at the noon feast. :smack:

I don’t think I’d trust instructions that said to cook for 1m 70 sec, or a microwave that was capable of displaying that time, but then again, in my universe, a minute has only 60 seconds.

I’m usually the first caffiene fiend to get to work, so I put on a pot when I get in. I routinely forget to put the actual coffee in the filter, thusly, brewing a piping hot pot of… hot water. I do it at least once or twice a week.

I removed the door of my microwave and disabled the safety lock so I can save even more time by not having to open and close the door. My skin seems to be drooping, tho. I’ll go to the doctor tomorrrow at 75 minutes after two.

You see your S.O. bright and early in the morning and say that they’ve never looked better.

Remember to acutally plug in the crock pot so that when you return home after that great movie there will actually be a potroast stew ready.

Hey, my wife thought this was funnier than the movie…and she got to choose where we went out to eat while the stew cooked for tomorrow.

And don’t forget…library books should not be kept in the refridgerator, no matter how chilling the mystery.

you mean 2min 10 sec doncha? kinda reminds me of people who like to tell you their kids age in months even after 2yrs, " my sons 28 months old" …go figure…

I admit - I fudged the timing for effect (to make it look like I waited longer) The actuall time was 70 seconds. I just added a minute to that. And by doing so I ruined my post because people are focusing on that rather than the amusing stupidity of not putting the food in the microwave.

<slap forehead>

Possible moral to this story - life is better when we make mistakes!

I certainly had a good laugh at my stupidity, and had an excuse to post to the Boards about it.

Along the same lines…putting coffee in the basket…without the filter!


(btw…I have a “BUN coffeemaker.” Did this not too long ago…put the coffee on…go do something else and come back to find, nothing! The pitcher is still in the sink full of water. arg)

Oh, there’s yet another variation on inattentive coffee-making: pour in the water, put the coffee in the filter, start…

…without the pot in place. Yeah, that’s a nice mess. And I’ve done it more than once.

When i was writing my dissertation i forgot to eat for two days - i had a kettle and a fridge (full of coke) in my room so never went downstairs.

It honestly never crossed my mind as i was so wrapped up in writing/reading etc. Especially as it was due in at the end of that week.

About 11 O’Clock on the second evening, my housemate (god bless her) came up with a tray on which were a full roast dinner (With turkey, stuffing, yorkshire puddings EVERYTHING) and a glass of white wine.

She just looked at me and said:

“Eat this right now or i’ll kick you in the balls.”

It was only then that i realised just how impossibly hungry i was.

When cooking rice in the microwave, be sure to add WATER to the container. This will result in soft, sticky rice… instead of destroying the container by melting a hole through the bottom of it.
Don’t ask how I know this. Just trust me on this one.

Max :slight_smile:

I think most microwave ovens are capable of it. I always punch in “90” instead of “130” to cook for 1m30s, because I’m too lazy to enter three numbers. It always seems to work.

A salutory tale

When I was at university, I had to do an essay, so I thought I’d perk myself up with a lovely pot of coffee. I put the coffee in the filter, filled the machine with water, and turned it on.

A few minutes later I smelled a heavenly coffee smell coming from the kitchen, far stronger than normal. On investigation, I found that I’d forgotten to put the jug into the machine, and 5 or 6 cups of coffee were pouring all over the machine and then onto the floor.

I realised that the coffee jug was in the living room, so to salvage the last of the coffee still pouring everywhere, I dashed to get it. As I ran through the living room door, I stepped on something that went “crump”. I looked down. I’d just smashed the coffee jug.

I’ve done this any number of times with what would have been tea, had I remembered to put some tea leaves into the pot with the hot water. There’s nothing quite like pouring out that first steaming, crystal-clear cup and thinking, “Oops.”

Along similiar lines, I have found that water boils so much faster if you remember to turn on the heat under the kettle.

This is more of a “I just woke up” than a “I forgot the obvious”, but…

We keep our coffee in the freezer, so it won’t get stale. The other morning, I put 6 cups of water in the coffeemaker, put the filter in, went to the freezer, got the ice cube tray, counted out 6 ice cubes, and put them in the basket.
Luckily I noticed that I had gotten 6 ice cubes, not 6 scoops of coffee, before I out the machine on.


One of these days I’m going to wash my face with toothpaste.

Been there - done that. its not very refreshing!