Return of the BiL (duffer gets screwed again)

The BBQ Pit
1

Some of you may remember the problems of BiL moving in (squatting) for a few months. Here’s a whole new one for ya. And my wife, God bless her, is just as culpable.

Our Cellular One contract is set to expire on Nov. 2. We got him a cell phone in March of this year and he’s been pretty good at paying it on time. A one year contract, we figured we could absorb the cost if he flaked out as long as he paid the extra for the phone. (2 year contracts get a better deal on the sale)

As some may remember, he had the married slut he was courting, and spent the majority of his free time, and any other time, talking to her. We got the bills since they were in our name. We never opened them, but they were THICK!

Now I find out my wife, in her infinite wisdom, has opened a 3rd fucking account so he can have a second cell line. Apparently the Motorola he bought is a piece of shit. He needed a new contract to get a better phone. Now, I’ve had the Kyocera 5135 for 2 years, he’s had a Motorola flip=phone for a year that cost $100 more at time of contract. Newer phone, better features, but it’s somehow not good enough.

So now he has TWO fucking lines, on two fucking phones, and before I knew of this deal, I actually wondered why he was talking on 2 phones simultaneously while I knew he couldn’t finance a pack of Juicy Fruit.

So the deal now is this. He has one line under contract for a year, another line under contract until Sept 2006, and we’re responsible for it. I don’t know if I should be pissed at my wife for putting us up to this, or pissed at him for taking advantage of us again. He sure as shit didn’t think to ask me if it was alright.

On the other hand, my wife seems to think that marriage is a non-factor if it involves her immediate family. I view marriage as something where we’re in this together and make decisions together. I’d never extend cash nor credit to my family without discussing with her.

So, am I being a cave-dweller, or do I have a legit beef?

2

You have major beef, my friend. She 's spending your dough as though you have no say in the matter.

BTW, why a second contract for a new phone? Could you get a new phone under the same contract. At the very least, under an extension of the contract?

3

I don’t have a cell phone. Please send one my way. Oh, and thanks for picking up the tab.

4

I’d say it’s time, duffer, to remove the “Kick Me” sign from your back.

5

Thanks for the support. No, Cellular One offers no extension on a contract if you want to buy a new phone and re-up an existing contract. You pretty much buy a new phone at full price, or wait to sign a new contract. He apparently couldn’t wait. Though, as I said the first phone works just fine. My wife is just a sucker for wanting to “help out” a family member. Nothing wrong with that, as long as she (and by extension, me) doesn’t get screwed.

Holy shit, I’m starting to realize how pissed I really am about this. I’m now on the hook for $1200 minimum and my phone is set to shut off in 8 days!

FUCK!!! :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad:

6

Preach it. But it was my wife that did this behind my back. I just found out today and it happened Sept 10. :smack: I hate my life. Anyone want to road trip to Vegas?

7

For once, you seem to have a legitimate beef. You might want to sit down and have a talk with that wife of yours, not your BiL.

Remember, ‘Fuck me once, shame on you, fuck me twice…’

Sam

8

Yeah ** duffer ** I would say you have a beef here. It’s one thing to loan a family member a few (VERY FEW) bucks without talking it over with your spouse first (unless it’s your last few bucks) but signing a contract is a whole other ball game.

I know my own LIONsob would be none too pleased with me if I did that.

9

Ugh. Duffer not cave-dweller. but UGGG Bro-in-law is a parasite.

How bad can a 'phone *possibly be? I take it the thing works, just does not too anythign especially clever? And why can’t he, if short of money, damn well use a pre-pay phone - buy phone very cheap - cannot get into debt with it, as you have to pre-pay. (yes, the actual calls tend to be more expensive, but impecunious Celyns get by with that method, simply cos it’s the only one possible. BiL should learn to live within his means, or lack of means.

Now, I’d understand, I think, if his need for the phone - oops - phones plural - was connected with getting a job, or a place to live, but if it is mainly to chat with his beloved, why whould you or anyone else be paying for it?
This all sounds very bad to me. And I’m sorry, but I do think it pretty bad for your
wife to do this as a fait accompli.

I think you’re being ripped off, here, Duffer. And if BiL is a fixture pro tem, I think you and Mrs Duffer need to have a little talk. He’ll never move out if he gets everything handed to him chez Duffer

I understand about helping about family and taking people into one’s home when needed, but when it turns out that the “helpee” is hapily settling down to take advantage of such a useful arrangemetn, it is doubleplusungood! :mad:
(Sun blinding me (yes, *even in Scotland! haha ) so do please forgive typos cos I am sure there are several)

10

You have every right to be upset. BIL is playing your wife for a fool.

Haj

11

It would have been undoubtedly cheaper for you had your wife went and bought a new phone outright rather than getting one for “free” but having to open up another account. Just go to your provider’s website. There are lots of phones to choose from for outright purchase. No service agreement required.

Do the math.

New (non-camera) phone: $100-300

“Free” phone + 2 year agreement: Minimum of $19.99/mo. + tax for 24 months: $600 (minimum) + airtime not covered by his plan

Of course, there’s little you can do now. If your wife insists on subsidizing her brother on your dime, then I’d insist she should get him pre-paid cell phone cards, avail at Sam’s or Costco. At least with those you know that you’ll only be out the cost of the card. Signing him up for cell phone service is open-ended and a potential mine field.

Personally, I think you need to have a serious discussion with your wife about her “generosity.” I’d even recommend counseling. You obviously love her but know that the #1 reason couples get divorced in this country is money. If you don’t find a compromise now, the situation will only get worse.

12

Preach it, sistah. Your wife was way out of line but there’s an even deeper problem with your relationship. You have to talk to her, um, now. You have some serious communication issues and perhaps a counselor can help you (and her!) learn to talk to each other.

13

me me!! pick me!!

seriously, my soon to be ex husband spent my money without my knowledge, now he’s gone. i guess his sister is paying his way now, as he doesn’t seem to know how, and probably never will. i didn’t find out til i got the bill

14

Hell yes, you have a legit beef duffer, first with your wife and then with that BiL. I personally think you are totally in your rights just to yank the phones out from under him and send him on his way.

Your wife is a different matter. You may or may not want to send her on her way. I’m thinking not but I may be wrong. Sit her down and talk to her. If she can’t be trusted not to do this again it may be time for (at the very least) separate accounts.

Good luck whatever you decide to do…and keep us posted if we can help.

Sharron

15

You have a serious problem. You’re married to it and the problem has a brother.

I would immediately confiscate both phones. Check the contract and see how much the penalty is for early termination. If it’s cheaper than keeping the phone active, then terminate the accounts immediately.

Then have a come-to-Jesus meeting with your wife. Pick a date a couple of weeks out in the future. Tell her that the BiL is gone on or before that date. If he’s not, his shit gets thrown in the street. If she complains, tell her that her shit can get thrown right next to his. And if she gets him another cell phone after this, it will be.

Good luck, amigo!

16

First, I forgot to mention he has gotten a new apt. So the living arrangements are settled. As for my wife doing this, I know she didn’t do it just to piss me off, and she probably did think she talked to me about it. I think the problem is that my BiL can be very convincing (conniving, whatever).

I blew up last night, and also got to rant here. I’m feeling much better now. Thanks for the words everyone.

See ya next time someone torques my nut. :slight_smile:

17

it takes 6 weeks of residency to qualify for the instant divorce, BTW… :smack:

18

Vote Kerry!

19

Wait, wait - do you two maintain separate finances? If it’s her own money from her own checking account, all you can do is roll your eyes.

Otherwise, it’s time for couples therapy - your wife is not only a sucker for her family members, but she’s also got some idea that she’s entitled to spend your collective money without consulting you. And neither of you has the right to do that. If she pulls shit like this again, then you need to figure out a way to resolve the situation for good, because it won’t end on its own. And start by asking the wife her plan for coming up with the $1200.

20

Are you trying to torque duffer’s nut?

:eek: