Very sorry for your loss.
^This^
It’s that loss of your life-long companion – or child – that hurts the worst. For a while after DesertWife died I’d see or hear something cool when I was out and about and think, “I’ll have to tell DW about this … oh.”
It gets better.
That happens with parents too.
I’ve never lost a spouse, but losing a parent is a lot of work. You have to figure out what to do with their clothes, return their library books, sell or give away their car, or even if they willed it to someone, get it delivered.
I can’t even begin to imagine losing a spouse. I mean, I was just doing the easy stuff when my dad died, while my mother did the hard stuff with the banks and accountants and lawyers and rabbis.
Thinking gentle thoughts for you @elbows
I’m very sorry to hear this, elbows. My wife also died during the Christmas season, less than a week before Christmas. That first Christmas was very hard, remembering all the joyful past Christmases. I spent weeks more or less wandering around the now vast and empty house, trying to deal in near panic with the impossible new life I was thrust into. While it’s true that time heals, I remember that that was a maxim that seemed incomprehensible at the time, and I reacted with anger when people expressed such a thing to me. I hope that you have friends who will support you in this difficult time, and that you don’t have to deal with this change alone.
I’m so sorry for your loss, @elbows. I can’t even imagine what it must be like. You have my deepest condolences.
Well I started well, slept good, showered, ate…thought I had the rhythm down, I swear.
Unexpectedly fell asleep on the couch. Three hours later, suddenly awakened with wild hair, no lights on, big storm raging, yikes!
You think you’re going in one direction, but sometimes not so much.
Is this seat taken?
Or can aching grief sit next
To laughing life?
They’re old friends and
Won’t mind
How close they have to be
Elbows bumping
And touching at the knee.
(Jessica Ardis)
I wish you healing, strength, and wisdom.