Ripped men and attractiveness

[cormac262]

Okay, so I’m reading through this thread, and it seems the general concensus is that muscular, ripped (and hairless) guys are not all that attractive. Some even mentioning that they don’t even find them attractive on magazine covers.

Yet what do the Chippendale’s and Thunder from Down Under guys look like ? Who pack in 1000’s of screaming women ?

So the question is: is it only the members of the SDMB that don’t find these body types attractive ? Is it just a “sampling error” ? (the responses here are not reflective of the general population - only of the SDMB population)
(or is it that the people who do find these body types attractive afraid to admit it ?)

[Markxxx]

As a man who IS ripped, I can tell you it’s over-exaggerated. I have 44 chest, 30 waist 15 arms and a six pack and no one cares.

I also bought into that gay thing, all you need is a body, but that ain’t so.

I found other things like endowment size, money and just a good looking face, trump any considerations over body.

If I am in shorts and a t-shirt, people will say “Wow great body.” But no one ever hits on me, or even really cares. It’s way over exaggerated. If you are trying to get ripped, my adivce is work on something else. Get more money, get whiter teeth, better haircut, etc. Those things will count far more toward being attractive to others

[JR_Brown]

@cormac262

Okay, so I’m reading through this thread, and it seems the general concensus is that muscular, ripped (and hairless) guys are not all that attractive. Some even mentioning that they don’t even find them attractive on magazine covers.

Yet what do the Chippendale’s and Thunder from Down Under guys look like ? Who pack in 1000’s of screaming women ?

So the question is: is it only the members of the SDMB that don’t find these body types attractive ? Is it just a “sampling error” ? (the responses here are not reflective of the general population - only of the SDMB population)
(or is it that the people who do find these body types attractive afraid to admit it ?)

I’d say that it’s a case of self-selection plus media attention; those kinds of enterprises have been on TV / into the news / absorbed by pop culture, and of course they attract the kinds of women who like those kinds of guys. The other “hey girls, let’s all lust over guys” thing that generates thousands of drooling, hormonally charged women is yaoi, which tends to feature men who look like this (potentially very mildly NSFW).

[JR_Brown]

Incidentally, when discussing yaoi a fair number of women have mentioned that one of the major reasons they like it is precisely because of the ready availability of willowy prettyboys, a type that is largely ignored by other smut-for-ladies media. Yaoi in Japan does contain a range of body types, but the english-language licensees have ignored the more manly artstyles, largely on grounds of lack of reader interest.

[Mijin]

@cormac262

So the question is: is it only the members of the SDMB that don’t find these body types attractive ? Is it just a “sampling error” ? (the responses here are not reflective of the general population - only of the SDMB population)
(or is it that the people who do find these body types attractive afraid to admit it ?)

IANA woman, but there may be other explanations.

It may be that women going out paying to watch a guy strip want a god’s gift to women – a representation of masculinity and sexuality.
But in terms of actually meeting someone on the street, such an appearance might not be ideal.

In other words, what I’m speculating, is that maybe women have one kind of fantasy in mind when going to a strip show, and another fantasy in mind for a guy they’d actually date.

And when responding to the OP, many women have in mind the latter.

@Markxxx

As a man who IS ripped, I can tell you it’s over-exaggerated. I have 44 chest, 30 waist 15 arms and a six pack and no one cares.

I also bought into that gay thing, all you need is a body, but that ain’t so.

I found other things like endowment size, money and just a good looking face, trump any considerations over body.

While I agree with the general point of your post – I do think being ripped is exaggerated – I think the other attributes you’ve mentioned are exaggerated too.

I have friends who are tall, good-looking, wealthy etc, but can’t get a date. They just lack confidence and (in many ways unfortunately), confidence is super important.

I don’t know much about the gay community (or whether you’re gay) but I never get hit on by anyone – male or female. Still my new physique definitely seems to be an asset when flirting with girls. My main reason for thinking that is how much more often women casually touch my arms or shoulders etc while we’re chatting.

[calm_kiwi]

@cormac262

Okay, so I’m reading through this thread, and it seems the general concensus is that muscular, ripped (and hairless) guys are not all that attractive. Some even mentioning that they don’t even find them attractive on magazine covers.

Yet what do the Chippendale’s and Thunder from Down Under guys look like ? Who pack in 1000’s of screaming women ?

So the question is: is it only the members of the SDMB that don’t find these body types attractive ? Is it just a “sampling error” ? (the responses here are not reflective of the general population - only of the SDMB population)
(or is it that the people who do find these body types attractive afraid to admit it ?)

I think that women generaly see Chippendale’s, Thunder from Down Under etc as an excuse to be “blokey”. They don’t neccesarily fancy the ripped talent, they just enjoy seeing blokes being objectified. The herd menality kicks in.

Personally I like a very lean guy with nice arms. Six packs are icky.

[KarlGrenze]

@Sleel

My point was refute the idea that it takes hours and hours in the gym to look that ripped. He and I pull our workouts from the same source. Some workouts are time-based — doing a set amount of work as fast as you can with a particular weight — and on those days he probably takes about 1/3 the time it takes me to finish. That means his warmup is probably longer than the workout. I doubt he dedicates more than 8 hours a week to working out.

If someone watched TV, or read for an hour to an hour-and-a-half a day, it would be unremarkable. But if you spend an hour working out five or six days a week, suddenly that time becomes an exceptional amount to spend on an activity. Odd, that.

Thanks for pointing out that some people don’t have to work out as hard as others to achieve similar results. Many of us in this thread think that you have to train for long hours in order to be that ripped (and that we don’t find that too attractive). Personally, during the warmer months, I do spend a lot of time working out. Not to get ripped muscles, but just to keep myself fit (and train). But then, I’m not the one who mentioned anything about too much time at the gym. I spend a lot of time there, and I like guys who work out.

I’ve also caught an undertone of “guys who exercise aren’t especially bright” in most threads like this. That’s especially untrue. There have been studies like this one that show that exercise helps combat age-related declines, and kids who are physically fit have also been found to do better in school.

I don’t think most of the females here have said that “guys who exercise aren’t especially bright”. I do see more of the “I’ll take brains over brawn”. Between a guy who is very ripped and another one who has other traits the woman finds more attractive, she’ll go for the later. Ideally, I’d want a guy with both the body and personality I dream about.

[JThunder]

@cormac262

Yet what do the Chippendale’s and Thunder from Down Under guys look like ? Who pack in 1000’s of screaming women ?

So the question is: is it only the members of the SDMB that don’t find these body types attractive ? Is it just a “sampling error” ? (the responses here are not reflective of the general population - only of the SDMB population)
(or is it that the people who do find these body types attractive afraid to admit it ?)

Excellent point. I’d say that it’s a question of sampling error. That is, the people who are most likely to respond will be the ones who’d say “Heck, no! We don’t go for that!”

It’s like asking if a man would date a woman who’s 30-50 lbs overweight. Or asking people if they’d date an Asian man or a black woman. Few people would candidly say, “No, I wouldn’t.” As a result, you’ll have a disproportionately large number of respondents whose answers don’t fit the common wisdom.

I once started a thread in which I asked the ladies which one of the Monkees they preferred. Some said Micky, some said Peter, and some said Mike. Not a single person admitted to liking Davy Jones, and yet he was the most popular Monkee by far to the fair gender. I chalked that up to reluctance on the part of the readers to admit that they liked the one who was the most physically attractive.

[Sleel]

@KarlGrenze

Thanks for pointing out that some people don’t have to work out as hard as others to achieve similar results. Many of us in this thread think that you have to train for long hours in order to be that ripped (and that we don’t find that too attractive).

This is not entirely true. Yes, everyone varies in how quickly or how well they respond to training, but the way most people work out is far from optimal. I used to spend way more time in the gym, but I never got into the kind of shape I am now. That guy and I both do this. The main thing that’s atypical about him is that he never skips a session and pushes himself all the time. Not too long ago I realized that skipping a day or two here and there puts me weeks or eventually months behind someone who consistently works out without missing.

There are elites among the people who do the workouts I follow, but even the middle of the pack can do stuff that would stomp the crap out of your average gym-rat. I can do workouts now that I never thought I’d be able to do. Sure, genetics makes a difference, but I’d say the vast majority of people never push themselves hard enough to even get close to their potential, and there are so many myths about fitness that even more people end up wasting their time on useless crap instead of getting results.

[monkeybrain]

As a stray guy (straight but will stray for a free, nsa servicing from anything that breathes), I’ll say it like this…first and foremost: my body fat has been between 9% and 21% and fluctuates quite a bit.

It only takes a bit of discipline and mind control to attain the ripped look, fit look, healthy body look, whatever semantics you care to use. Good mind/self control tends to carry over into other aspects of life. Any kind of reasoning about why guys shouldn’t look their best is BS and let’s just face it. A person who exercises normally and eats right will or can be at their optimal level. Its good sense, period.

[beowulff]

Well, since this thread has been re-animated, I’ll just present my 2¢:
I’ve gotten pretty ripped myself over the last two years (photos in the gallery), but I really only do it for myself. My wife doesn’t really care one way or the other. I like it when people comment on my physique, but since my opportunities for going shirtless are limited, it doesn’t happen very often. Still I like the way I look this way.

[Ambivalid]

To me, being ripped is a testament to some of my characteristics as a person, to some degree. I take care of my health, I understand exercise and fitness and I have the discipline/self control to be able to forgo short-term cravings in pursuit of longer term rewards. And it shows that I just understand my body, which, to a woman, can mean that I can understand hers all that much better. Plus, being a paraplegic, being ripped is a source of motivation and inspiration for others (both able=bodied and disabled). (and I know some of you will scoff at that last sentence, but I wasn’t writing it for you anyway).

[Rachellelogram]

@Illuminatiprimus

I mean, have you seen some of the guys (both celebrity and in the real world) with good looking women hanging of their arms who couldn’t exactly be described as catches?

I think this is more due to stereotypical standards of dating, which for females hinge more on personality and attentiveness and for males hinge more on beauty and shape. I mean, when’s the last time you saw an uggo chick with a beautiful guy? It’s much more rare than the converse.

I’m a female who doesn’t give a fig what her boyfriend looks like, as long as he cares about me. Over time, a traditionally unattractive person that I care for BECOMES more beautiful to me (I can’t explain this phenomenon).

But on topic, if I were to just describe my ideal of physical attractiveness in a male, he’d be rangy with a bit of a tummy, have beautiful hands with long wide fingers, hairy chest/legs/arms and facial stubble, tanned or light brown skin, black hair, blue eyes, and taller than me. Not ripped, but not a total couch potato. And a thick 7-8 inch dick.

[jackdavinci]

Well ripped guys are great for posters, general eye candy, movie stars, and porn.

I have some minimum level of fit I require in romantic partnership, but it’s not at the level of super ripped. And to be fair I hold myself to the same standard. If I’m not at that level, I don’t feel like dating.

WRT women on guys arms, while standards are definitely changing, and now men can’t get away with what they used to fitness wise any more, for decades women were more attracted to other aspects of men, such as money and power.

As a gay man you should know there is a wide variety of what people are looking for WRT what’s considered attractive. In the gay community we have twinks, sugar daddy’s, bears, queens, jocks, Chelsea boys, butch/femme, etc.

I think it’s less a matter of type, than of similarity. No one bats an eye at two “fours” together, but a “three” and a “nine” now that’s a scandal!!

Personally, all other factors aside, I like a healthy man, even a fit man, but not a super hulk. And, I can’t realistically ignore the other factors. Even with the exactly right not too little not too much muscle man, there’s other things at play that could make him unsuitable, and the within range but not ideally fit guy suitable for me.

I’ve got to add, I really don’t get the prejudice against short guys. As a tall guy, (6-2) I find “kissing up” a novelty, but I really couldn’t care at all about height. I’ve dated as short as 5-3 and aside from putting strain on my knees when dancing I was perfectly satisfied.

[jackdavinci]

At the risk of over sharing, I think that even within the subset of people that like muscles of some sort, every one has their preferences. Six packs might be in vogue right now, but personally I prefer pecs, with biceps being a distant second. I know plenty of people who prefer some other muscle group.

[jackdavinci]

WRT hair, I only don’t like back/neck hair. No hair is weird. Excessive hair us also weird. Love trail is absolutely required. But trimming the nether regions is nice.

[Ambivalid]

I think a big point of distinction is the natural vs. chemically-enhanced look. A ripped, lean, muscular natural physique, to me, is the epitome of a “human look”. It is the human body at it’s best. There is nothing alien or non-human looking about this look, IMO.

It is the men who abuse steroids and other anabolic drugs who have the freakish, alien, obviously-didn’t-occur-from-just-a-protein-shake look. Swollen, huge, vascular muscles; combined with an extremely low body fat percentage, just isn’t humanly possible without the aid of these drugs (and in extremely high doses). So there is a reason why they look so inhuman. Because, in a sense, their bodies are no longer human.

[panache45]

As I’ve mentioned many times in the past, I have a special attraction to skinny guys. My first fantasy, at the age of 5, was about a skinny guy on our street. And now . . . my partner is pretty much built like a pencil. Single-digit body fat, and his muscles are long, lean and tight, without bulging.

This preference pretty much trumps most other characteristics. Height, to me, is irrelevant. So is hair color (or even lack of hair), eye color, ethnicity, etc. Give me a skinny guy who’s smart and has a great personality, and I don’t care about the rest.

But I have to point out that I also respond at times to a lot of little details about a guy . . . the shape of his nose, his mouth, his eyebrows, his ears, his hands, and lots of other little things. And there even are times when I’m attracted to a guy who’s not skinny. Attraction can be extremely complex, and a great number of qualities and characteristics are involved.

Oh, and another thing: I HATE trimmed eyebrows. I see so many guys who ruin their faces by removing the natural contour of their eyebrows. I’d even rather see a monobrow than what some guys have done to themselves.

[FairyChatMom]

I like to look at attractive men, and I love watching male dancers (thinking Patrick Swayze-esque or Broadway-type dancers rather than ballroom or whatever dance show du jour is popular.) I can’t stand super bulked-up bodybuilder types - massive muscles are just creepy and unnatural. And as someone else mentioned, I’m not comfortable with guys who are better looking than I am.

As for men I’ve dated in the past, I gravitate towards men in the 5’8"-5’10" range (I’m 5’5") who have a little bit of padding. Hugging skinny guys can be painful… If you look at the 3 guys I dated most seriously (the last of whom I married) all were physically similar, right down to the facial hair. And I find a nice forearm to be particularly sexy.

[even_sven]

I like guys who range from slim/athletic to “Okay, that’s just skinny.” The ideal would be a lean, wiry, “swimmer’s build” with good tone but not too much bulk. I’m turned off by any level of fat or “jiggle.” I make the effort to keep myself slim, and I’d hope whoever I’m with can do that as well.

I prefer shorter guys who I can look in the eye, and too much hair squicks me out. The really ripped look is just gross, and most “bulky” guys just look fat to me.