RO-Woman with baby aboard flies plane drunk, crashes into puppies and kittens!

The BBQ Pit
1

Oh! Mhi! GHOD!!!

This is the very, VERY worstest thing EVHER!!!

I just read that there was this one woman!

She was flying a plane! And she was drunk! And high! On CRACK!!!

And she had a baby strapped in and it wasn’t even in a baby seat!!!

THEN, WHILE DRUNK she BROKE THE PLANE! And there were no parachutes aboard.

So she GUTTED her baby and used it’s skin to MAKE A BALLOON and she floated down on her DEAD BABY’S CORPSE!

AND THE PLANE CRASHED INTO A BUNCH OF KITTENS AND PUPPIES THAT WERE FROLICKING WITH BABY HARP-SEALS!

AND THEN, she minced up her baby and stuffed it’s minced up body into it’s own intestines! And made SAUSAGES WITH THEM! AND SHE ATE IT AND STAYED ALIVE!

AND NOW SHE’S PREGNANT WITH NINE-TUPLETS!

I’m normally in favor of the death penalty, but I’ll oppose it this time so she can get sent to prison and be raped. In the BUTT! A LOT!

I’m glad I’m a better person than she is.

I’ll bet no-one can think of a WORSE story to be recreationally outraged about than this!

Fenris, aghast

[sub]
A) Parody threads are allowed and don’t have to be labeled, as long as they’re linked. This one is.

B) Anyone who feels the need to post RO threads, be my guest. It’s within the rules. But so’s mine. :wink:
[/sub]

2

Well, you don’t know the circumstances. Sometimes people just have to fly planes drunk and crash into kittens and puppies. You can’t judge her.

3

Oh this is terrible :frowning:

4

What about the baby harp seals???

Don’t you have a conscience?!

5

No sane person would do any of that. Ergo, she was insane.

And so you’re not being very nice by making fun of the mentally ill. :mad:

6

I heard she declawed cats for a living.

7

don’t you say that! I care about the mentally ill more than you do!

8

I heard she ordered milk. In a bar. Once. For twenty minutes.

9

But did she let the cats live outside or inside? We really need to know.

Also: does her weight factor into any of this?

10

But why a plane? Why didn’t she just drive her SUV?

11

You haven’t heard the latest. Apparently, her plane crash-landed onto a tour bus filled with elderly nuns, which rolled out of control into an orphanage which caught fire and burned down the entire block, including a baby formula factory. Three firemen (and one cop, who was two days from retirement) were killed while fighting the inferno.

Tragic. :frowning:

12

She declawed and CIRCUMCISED cats for a living!

13

Well, the almost-retired-cop was doing something racist so that’s okay.

14

Frankly, I’m offended that none of this has to do with gay people. Why are you excluding us?

15

FEMALE cats!

16

If she flew into a puppy mill, should I be more outraged because she offed hundreds of puppies, or less outraged because it’s a puppy mill?

Nonetheless, I’d be more outraged if I find out the puppies are mostly black or brown, because then she would be a RACIST! to boot.

17

I’m still more outraged than all of you.

18

Yes, but you seem more PROFESSIONALLY outraged.

:smiley:

19

I, for one, am outraged. I mean, who let that woman fly a plane? She should be home cooking for her husband and changing diapers like The Good Lord intended.

20

Beats me how she crashed - she wasn’t texting at the time.