A friend’s daughter was baptized this weekend at a local mega church (well, a smaller mega-church, let’s call it a mini-mega church). It has a large auditorium with movie theater seats, including cup holders. Of course there are cup holders where else can you put the free coffee and hot chocolate they have in the lobby? But I’m getting ahead of myself. We had to drive all over the dang parking lot and ended up parking about as far away as possible from the sanctuary, or whatever they call it. We walked all through the childcare area, and had to ask directions. And we turned a corner and hit the lobby. It was huge! There ws the coffee, the little cafe area and two screens setup with chairs for watching the service. And we could immediately feel and hear the bass drum from the rock band playing. Hoo boy, a rock band. These guys were pretty good, very polished.
The “worship leader” was wearing cargo pants and a casual shirt, untucked. There was communion, just little crackers and juice. They had lots of Bible quotes on the huge monitors, a couple mentions of satan, and more rock ‘n’ roll.
I grew up in the 70s and attended parochial schools, that means I was subjected to the worst of the Folk Mass. There were guitars, flutes and, believe it or not, a bass with amp in church at one point. I am once again a member of that same parish and the music has swung back to the very traditional organ and choir, with the occasional piano and the even more occasional larger group which again includes guitars and flutes and a brass quintet at Xmas time. Even as much as I dislike the music in Mass these days (my parish sings everything), that’s what I consider “church” to be like.
From the worship perspective they are waaay liberal. From a theological perspective they were, um, much less so. And on a cynical note, I guess the former packs 'em, in the seats and
I hope your post didn’t trail off like that because of the whole, um, smiting thing.
We have a church like that where I live. It’s gigantic, and they are expanding. They already have a coffee house for the teens, a huge gymnasium where women go for “Fit for the King” aerobics classes, and the auditorium-style sanctuary. (And an attached Christian school, of course.)
It’s all very “hey, aren’t we all hip and modern-like!” – except for the fact that women have no leadership roles, unless you consider providing baked goods for the fellowship time after the service or teaching Sunday school. A woman in the pulpit? Blasphemy! A woman on their church governing body? Fuhgedaboudit.
Can one be smitten and not know it? I have no idea what happened to my last sentence. And I’m not sure where I was going there either.
But I’m not sure about the role women play in the workings of the church, but the place I went to seems like you describe. There’s no need to go anywhere else but church for all your life needs! It seems kind of weird if you ask me.
ETA: And speaking of Ohio, while I was writing the OP, Heywood Banks’ “Big Butter Jesus” was going through my mind. That guy kills me!
I have one of those around here, too. It serves the same purpose bowling leagues used to fill in the 70’s. It’s just an activity that people use as an excuse to socialize. If they could figure out a good excuse to serve alcohol on a Sunday morning, they’d do that. Luckily, this one isn’t very big on roght wing politics.
The pastor had to leave recently when he was busted comitting adultery with an also married parishoner.
There’s one of those here - they recently built a new complex - yes, complex. In addition to the sanctuary there is a glass fronted building with a fast-food style indoor playground in it, a gym, and several softball fields. It also has a huge dot-matrix board - larger than the one at our Civic Center.
freckafree, are you talking about Parkside Church in Solon/Chagrin/Bainbridge/somewheres?
If so, I never knew that about their attitude towards women. I have a lot against that church - if you are talking about them, now I have more fodder for keeping my mom out.
Friend of mine went to a church in the Chicago area (Naperville maybe?) that was big enough to have it’s own post office. I think she said there were something like 40,000 members, and that they had service every two hours for most of every Sunday to accomodate everyone.
Same here! Two earnest women with Dorothy Hamill haircuts played guitar, and I believe there was a tambourine. They insisted on singing “Day By Day”. Marty Haugen should be tortured for some of what he foisted on us.
I like a lot of singing, but let it be piano/organ and the traditional kind of which you can actually carry the tune.
I’m not a big fan of churches in general, but I’ve seen my share of that type. We have quite a few of them here in Houston. They always remind me of what Hank on King of the Hill said when he visited one: “I might as well go walk around the mall and think about Jesus.”
One of the 10 biggest mega churches in the country is here in my hometown (I think that’s true anyway, it’s big) and the members have taken that term for their own.
I’m not posting from work any more, this was my first chance to reply…
I’m referring to Southeast Christian Church, with a weekly attendance something like 30,000. The sanctuary has three levels, if I remember correctly, and seats almost 10000. Their new campus cost something close to $100M (in two phases). All for the glory of God!
I think it might have been Willow Creek in Rolling Meadows…it’s the biggest one in the Chicago area, as far as I know. HUGE.
The thing that irks me about these churches is that a lot of the local Catholic parishes feel the need to “compete” with them. When I was in high school, a new parish was built that was very close to Willow Creek…they built it “in the round” style with riser-type seating, and NO KNEELERS! I couldn’t believe it. They have a lot of stuff like slide shows and “liturgical dance” (whatever that is) during the mass…drives me crazy. I haven’t been wildly impressed with our current Cardinal, but one thing I did like was when that parish wanted to do renovations, he said they weren’t getting a penny from the archdiocese unless the plan included kneeler installation. Reports are that they have kneelers now.
Fit for the King? That sounds so vaguely creepy and slightly erotic!
We have a mega-church a few blocks away that is constantly expanding, and building, and publishes a community newspaper that you find in stacks at every pizza place and Chinese restaurant. But it’s one of those personality churches…completely dependent on the personalities of the husband-wife preaching team that started it, which I think is a fragile way to run a church, if the Jim and Tammy Faye Bakker example has taught us anything. I’d rather have a church that has some structure and history behind it. The United Methodist church is this area of the country is much more liberal than any of the mega-churches, too, despite its reputation elsewhere. And the funny thing is, I’ve never met anyone around here who goes to the mega-church.
I am not comfortable in the modern megachurches at all. I did go to church with a friend of mine when I was visiting her: it wasn’t a megachurch but it was very ‘modern’ – the service was, quite literally, in a gymnasium. On folding chairs. I felt like we’d taken over a high school. There was a huge gigantic freaking screen upon which the lyrics to the Christian rock songs their (reasonably good) band played were displayed. We were, it seems, free to sing along. There were two people who waved their arms a lot and the guy who gave the sermon (no lesson that I remember, no readings from the Bible, not a trace of ceremony, just a sermon) seemed like a 35-year-old former member of NSYNC turned used car salesman. Even my friend was a little stunned – apparently he was new. We did, however, learn that sin is like frosting: it tastes really good, but if you JUST eat frosting you’ll get all sick. “So Jesus is the frosting – wait, no – Jesus is both the CAKE AND THE FROSTING! He’s EVERYTHING!”
Mmkay.
When I took my confirmation classes, the rector and the teachers were kind of shocked to discover that it was the 40+ year old parishoners who wanted Rite 2 (ceremonies with more modern language) and more contemporary ceremonies. Those of us in our 20s and 30s were jonesing for old-time ceremony: stand sit kneel sit, incense, Rite I, Holy Ghost, traditional songs. We weren’t any more conservative than anyone else, but we knew what we wanted our church to feel like.
I couldn’t see myself being comfortable in one. I haven’t been in one, but if it were anything like the one youth rally I went to (with Billy Graham’s son!) well… I felt kinda dirty and wrung out afterwards. Especially when I came to my senses and realized how caught up I was in it.
Yeah, I want that sort of thing in a church. Can’t get the incense anymore though, I haven’t seen it used since I was a kid in a small parish in the 80s and even then it was only rarely. I don’t like the one closest to me because it tries to meld the old and new and it’s totally jarring to go to mass and then the recessional is something we sang at summer camp during campfire (Christian summer camp vs Catholic mass).
I know what I want my church to feel like, and that certainly wasn’t it. (Which is the one reason I don’t really go anymore).
I think that’s the one down the street from me (in Hoffman Estates). Willow Creek. It’s freekin’ enormous and they do the mass on closed-circuit tv, complete with headsets.
Traffic Jam for hours every Sunday (and maybe Wednesday). They actually require traffic cops. You have to see it to grasp the true enormity of it all.