I was recently talking to someone who commented how sad it was to do all of the “lasts” now that their youngest kid is graduating from high school. Made me laugh, as the missus and I have been gleefully celebrating the last damn band concert ever, the last senior convo, etc.
Yeah, HS was fine, as were jr high and elementary, but I’m far more interested in the future as my kids become young adults (and we get them the fuck outta the house!) I found that after 20+ years I’m ready to e done being the round-the-clock parent to young kids. I’m ready to explore something else for the next 20 years or so.
Any other imminent empty nesters out there? Or any kids fleeing the nest able to comment on their parents’ reactions?
As a junior/senior teacher I watch this cycle all the time, and what I have noticed is that when the class ahead is graduating, the rising seniors’ parents are all weepy, anticipating their children leaving, but something almost biological kicks in around Christmas and by the time their children are actually walking across the stage they are mostly relieved.
This is most notable with active PTA parents who have 3-4 kids–when the last one is a junior, they are like “of course I’ll still be involved in everything, I’ve been running X Y and Z for 20 years now” but by spring they stop showing up to committee meetings and let others take over. It’s actually really entertaining to watch.
If your kids had the kind of grades my did during high school you would understand how glad I was to see them finish. Whew.
It is kind of sad though. We are one year into “empty nest” and we don’t see any of those other parents we used to see all the time at school functions. No more reason to go to school sporting events (the one thing my kids could do.)
One of ours came home for a few months in there so we didn’t really get to enjoy the nest very much. Maybe next year we will do all the partying and traveling.
We’re glad. Our youngest graduated two years ago. We’re not empty-nesters yet but hopefully that day will come. I don’t miss anything about them being in school!
shiftless, a lot of people here still go to the high school games even though their kids are long gone. In small towns, it seems like the whole town goes. Do people not do that there? I don’t, but I don’t care for sports, so I never went.
Our reaction came when we dropped them off at college, not when the graduated from high school, since they were still home over the summer. We’re four years into empty nesting, and it’s not bad at all. Of course frequent cell phone and Skype conversations help.
People go here (big city) and I sure like to see them and hear how their kids are doing–not just sports but dance team and musical/theater productions.
My parents were ecstatic when I left. My mom thought I was the worse child on the planet even though I was valedictorian with a 4.0 average. Also, my poor older sister was still living at home so it wasn’t really an empty nest.
My baby just graduated from College!!
I don’t mind being by myself. (got rid of spouse earlier!) We (the kid and I) stay in touch with instant messaging and e-mails and phone calls. He is staying at the University this summer, continuing his research, then going to Grad school ( PhD in Astrophysics, if I may brag a bit, fully paid for by the Grad school- WOO-HOO!) in the fall. I am glad that he’s going to California for grad school instead of Hawaii. I’ll probably fly out to see him once a year.
My older kids solved the problem of making me miss them by developing the world’s worst case of senioritis. Seriously, I tried to sell one of them on the Internet during this period. And he had always been such a good kid! (I mentioned the many offers of full scholarships in my Internet ad.)
I am assuming the youngest will go that route, too. At any rate: Four and a half more years.
Just last week we saw the last one graduate from college. The only way we could have been happier is if he already had a job lined up.
Our twins went away to college the same week our daughter left to spend a year overseas, so we went from three kids under our roof to zero. Now THAT was strange…but only for about a week.
High school graduation - both glad and sad. (The graduation ceremony was awesome - bagpipes! - took place downtown in the War Memorial, a class of over 1000). Baby girl headed off to 4 years of college, and we were empty nesters and all of us were VERY happy.
College graduation - both glad and sad. Now baby girl is back home and jobless and maybe planning on graduate school, and it’s VERY awkward for all of us right now.
We are so very proud of her and love her so very much. Of course we want the best future for her, but really, it’s out of our hands. A lot of anxiety is floating around the Salinqmind house…
While my youngest did not graduate in the typical sense, she got her GED, I was happy for her and she turned 18 two months after she passed.
She still lives with me so I an not an emtpy nester but she is more like a roommate. She does her thing and I do mine.
The only time she tells me where she is going is if she is going to stay overnight some place, which I appreciate. Otherwise she lives her own life. I mean we sit and gab everyday so I know what is going on with her and she is preparing for college classes in the fall so we talk about that as well.
I do however miss my son. He is 20 and moved out almost two years ago so I don’t see or talk to him that much. He is not a big telephone talker so if we do talk it is brief. That makes me a little sad but he is living his life and supporting himself so I am proud of him.
Overall I would say I am glad that they have both grown up to be fine young adults.
Kind of losses it’s charm when my own wonderkind isn’t playing. We went to a few events last year because we still know a lot of the kids and their parents but the magic that is our offspring was gone. What is there to talk about except how bad the team is now that our child gone?
I was happy when my son graduated. It meant that I no longer had to deal with all that public school bureaucracy, and no more filling out the same stupid forms every single year. Now my kids can do all that themselves.
As for empty-nesting, I loved the four months of quiet I had between when he moved out and my daughter moved back in! I’m counting the days until I can have my house back.
Sad and happy at the same time.
Regarding the empty nest - we sold it, bought a motor home and set out to see America. Over six years ago and it’s still a blast.
He is the happiest, healthiest kid ever; everybody loves him—friends, family, animals. Despite no longer having to pay child support, I cried all day when he graduated highschool last year. My baby!
