Samantha (dog) misses Larry (dog) so much. What to do? Advice / Comments Please

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

Here’s the story: When hubby and I were first married we picked up a puppy from the pound. The sweetest German Shephard/Great Dane mix you will ever meet. Named our new bundle of joy Larry. When he was just over a year old we added Samantha (seven week old German Shephard) to help Larry with his separation anxiety (couldn’t stand to be left alone and ate EVERYTHING, not to mention just too sad all the time). It was like night and day and they became the best of friends.

Twelve years pass and Larry passed away on December 23, 1999 due to old age and hip displacia. (Trust me, we tried everything but in the end it was the best thing we could do for him.)

Samantha (now 10) is not doing well. She’s just so sad all the time and won’t eat the dog food they both ate. I’m now cooking her food everyday (which is a good thing considering all of the food alergies she has). But what has us the most concerned is that she now pees in the house; specifically on the bed she sleeps on (a pile of old sleeping bags in a corner of our room). I discovered, more than once, big wet spots on our sofa. (I must make sure that I pile stuff on it before leaving for work.)

It’s been two months and no change. Samantha was never really our dog - she was Larry’s. She rarely demanded our attention and was content to just be with him, who was happy to be with us. Hindsite tells us we should have made an effort to make her more independant, obviously it’s too late for that.

Do you have any thoughts? Can we expect to see improvements? Should we do the same for her as we did for Larry by getting another dog? However, again I must add, Samantha is your typical female shephard - let’s just say BITCH is a good word for her for more than one reason.

Please, any advice, similiar stories, etc. would be most appreciated. Thanks gang,

TTFN
Lynn

2

I am sorry for your loss. It is very hard to lose a pet, especially after trying very hard to treat one. Been there. My sincere condolences.

I had a situation similar to this one a few years ago, but it was a dog who was very attached to a cat died. I had other dogs and cats and I think they gave him enough of a feeling of “pack” security that he was able to get past it. I saw improvement in his attitude in about two weeks. Same thing with a horse I had who was very attached to a goat; he very definitely grieved, but recovered within a few weeks.

Your dog doesn’t sound like she is recovering. This can be tricky, in my opinion. Another dog could well form a bond with her that could help her recover, but it’s not guaranteed and you could end up with two dogs that don’t get along, especially if your dog is an alpha female and the new dog doesn’t want to submit. A puppy or very young dog would probably be most likely to fit in and, as she’s a female, might inspire her mothering instincts, giving her a huge distraction from her current melancholy. (Pardon me for anthropomorphizing, but I’ve seen too much of what looked like genuine animal emotion for me to think that it doesn’t exist.)

If you are willing to take the trouble to get a puppy or young dog, possibly you could get it from the pound or from a breeder who would take it back if your female couldn’t accept it? This sounds harsh, but it’s better than subjecting both dogs to a relationship that one or both doesn’t want. In my opinion, this would be fairly likely to help her. The downside is that it MIGHT not work and a puppy or young dog requires a lot of work and is a serious commitment (as you no doubt know).

Wish I had an easy answer for you. Maybe someone else will. If you find a solution - or even if you don’t - I hope you’ll post about it in the future. I’d love to know how it turns out. Best of luck to you.

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I’m no expert, but my reflexive answer is the sorta the same as Uppity’s: get a puppy. Can you take a puppy? I know they’re a lot of trouble; my friends have a two-year-old border collie/mongrel that is puppy from the neck forward.

Anyway, my idea was that dogs are social, and being alone makes any dog kind of sad. Your dog sounds very social, in mother nature’s sense, and possibly not as social in the people sense. So a puppy might fit in really well, especially since dogs tend to take to puppies very warmly (kinda like humans that way…).

4

They have Prozac for canines.

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MLAW, you’re describing one of my fears, we too have two dogs both very attached and both getting older. I dread thinking of going through what you are right now.

Do you happen to have a friend who owns a puppy right now??? Maybe you could just go over for a visit taking Samantha with you, and see how Samantha does, if you see her perking up, then that could be an answer too. If you feel like taking on a puppy right now would be either too much to handle, or too much of a gamble.

Good luck, and I hope she cheers up soon, let us know how she does, okay?

Judy

“I only use 10% or less of what I study. It’s a waist. sined, Dropout” Up The Down Stair Case

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While I don’t doubt that Samantha is mourning, having her checked by a vet for physical problems would be a good idea. Wetting the bed and inappetance are signs of depression but could also be indications of disease.

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Thanks everyone for your kind words. Even after two months I miss Larry everyday.

As for physical concerns I took Sam to the vet after about two weeks of this behaviour. She’s in perfect health, physically. I specifically asked the Vet what we could do about her mourning. He said that she’s not morning as much as missing him. She is waiting for him to return from where ever he’s gone.

I don’t doubt the vets words. Watching her you can see that she’s looking for him. Every noise causes her to anxiously look in that direction. Every time the door opens she watches it closely.

For the last week of February my brother went on holiday for ten days, so we “babysat” his 5 yr old dog, Nanook (who is part Husky and lab). Samantha knows Nanook very well as we shared a campground spot with my brother while he was a puppy. Nanook is the ONLY dog Samantha likes. Although she still “wet the bed” while he was here she seemed much happier. Could almost see her smiling again and was quite happy to follow him around (as was the case with Larry). She was quite content to remain outside with him. We live in the sticks and have a two acre yard.

As for a puppy, I don’t think it would be fair to the pup at this point. My husband and I both work and are away from the house from 7:00 am until 5:00 pm, not to mention we’re still in the throws of winter. I’m not against getting another dog, but to be honest, I really don’t want to. Losing Larry was very difficult and we (husband and I) agreed a long time ago that we didn’t want any more dogs after our two passed on.

Again, Sam is very teritorial, protective and down right nasty (to dogs and kids, not adults). She’s put our new kitten into her place more than once. At ten years old she’s quite set in her ways.

Anti Pro: Every Saturday morning I take Sam with me to my brother’s house so she can play with Nanook. She does seem to enjoy it but it’s been so cold lately we’ve had to stay in the house. I’m not sure if I’m helping her or making her feel worse.

Michelle: Do you believe she will get better? Would getting another dog, assuming she accepted it, help? Would it be fair to a puppy to subject him/her to Sams moods?

Again, thanks everyone for your kind words and advice. If only I could explain to Sam why Larry is gone to ease her yearnings for him.

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MLAW - as a dog owner, breeder, and lover, I understand what you’re going through… :frowning:

You might want try, instead of a puppy, to get a “soft” adult male from the pound or from a breeder (sometimes they get dogs “returned” to them, and have a need to place adult dogs in families). Talk to a local dog trainer, ask them to come with you to select the dog - they will likely be able to administer a TT (Temperament Test) and pick a good match for your Samantha. This could very well avoid the heartache of having to return a dog because they simply don’t get along. The trainer will also be able to help you introduce the new dog to Samantha and make the transition.

I’ve done this for many people and helped them introduce a young dog in an “old dog’s territoriy” after the loss of another pet.

Canine depression is a real phenomenon… and as Boris pointed out, there are ways to medically treat it (Prozac, for one). This being said, sometimes all the animal needs is a little company…

Consider the adult dog, you might find your Sam a friend she can follow around…

Elenfair :slight_smile:

“Semper Ubi Sub Ubi.” =-)

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Oh GOSHDARNIT… :stuck_out_tongue: I just looked at MLAW’s profile…

MLAW - you live about 20 minutes away from me (I’m in Nepean)… I could help you with the dog selection, if you want (seeing as I’ve done this numerous times before…)

Cool! :cool:

E.

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Elenfair: Wow, it is a small world. Thanks for your suggestion. However, we’ve tried the adult-dog test. My inlaws have a year old, neutered male and a 6 month female; both are black labs and the sweetest temperments. There was NO WAY Sam would allow him near her. She made it quite clear.

A puppy would be the only one who would stand a chance. Not to mention that I also have two cats (both of which disapeared while Nanook was over) so a puppy would be best for them as well.

It’s so sad to see her so sad. We will do what we have to do and if that means a puppy, then a puppy we shall get. Just hoping to wait until spring. Afterall, Sam is the puppy we got for Larry and we owe her the same.

TTFN
Lynn

11

Lynn, do you still have an old blanket of Larry’s that Samantha could have? Or, I heard of someone doing this with a puppy, so maybe it isn’t applicable with Sam, but they got a real soft stuffed animal and they rubbed it with something that had the scent of the puppy’s mom on it, and it quieted the puppy at night. Maybe that would be worth a try…let’s hope for warmer weather for you, so that Sam can visit with Nanook more often. Keep us up to date on her, hopefully she’ll start feeling ‘spring’ in her step soon.

Judy

“The more hours people use the Internet, the less time they spend with real human beings.” Norman Nie, a Stanford political scientist on results of his study of the Internet’s impact on society.

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Since a few of you asked for an update I thought I’d take a minute and post one.

Last Friday I made a stop at the Vet Centre to pick up natural vitamins & minerals and Ear Cleaning solution for Samantha (she has chronic ear infections due to her alergies). While there I ran into a vet I hadn’t met before and mentioned Sam and her “problems”. Low and behold this vet remembered that older, spayed females can develop a condition of “leaking” and asked us if we noticed this. Yes, we did, I replied. Quite often Sam would get up from wherever she was laying, leaving a wet spot behind.

Anyway, after a urine test she has been diagnosed with this condition and started on medication. Although it’s still a little soon to assume she cured, I’m noticing a difference already. This goes to show you - a second opinion not only applies to people doctors but for animal doctors as well.

As to her depression, it too seems improving. The weather has been very pleasant of late and she’s quite content to remain outside and observe the world from the deck (something she hasn’t wanted to do). She has even started to bark at the dog across the street again.

With the approaching spring and summer my SO has once again started working on his boat (a 36’ huge monstrosity parked beside the house) and Sam is quite happy and content stay outside with him.

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I’m glad you posted this and I’m really glad she is doing better.

It’s funny…I can click out of here and never give another thought to the people, but I always remember the animals. I’ve thought about Samantha a number of times since your OP.

Thanks for the update!

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Yeah, I second that, thanks for taking time to update us. I’m glad that Sam is doing better, and that was really neat about the second opinion. That is a lesson all of us need from time to time.

“It’s hard to avoid reading because ever wheres we go, reading is there.”