For the sake of this question, imagine you wander into the kitchen and make yourself a sandwich. You’ve got your rather dull loaf of store-bought bread. Maybe it’s PB&J on white bread, or you’re getting in touch with your inner New Yorker and you slap some pastrami on rye. Whatever. You make a tasty sandwich.
What do you do before you eat it? For clarification:
*Vertical meaning cut so that you end up with rounded ‘top’ crust on both halves.
*Horizontal, meaning half your sandwich has only ‘top’ crust and the other only bottom.
*Diagonally, from corner to corner.
Depends on the bread shape. My usual sandwich loaf is somewhat wider than it is tall. These sandwiches I cut vertically. With a more perfectly square slice, I’ll cut diagonally.
If I’m really concerned about being proper then I’ll cut it into 13 exactly identical pieces. A protractor and laser surface mapping gear is essential for this task. The thirteenth piece is of course sacrificed to Slaanesh as a mark of respect and fealty.
Look at the sandwich with the crust as up and perpendicular right of the center as 0 degrees like a standard graph. Slice at about 60 degrees and 240 degrees.
Unless I can’t hold the sandwich together I don’t cut it at all. When i do make a monstrous sandwich that requires both hands to hold half of it then I’m cut it vertically.
Yeah, why is that, exactly? Something about grilled cheese that needs to be cut on the diagonal, but what? I don’t know, but it just isn’t right any other way.
When I first started making sandwiches for The Littlest Briston, I always cut them into four squares. Then one day, in a bid to change things up a bit, I cut them into triangles. She was hooked – that’s the only way she wanted them.
Recently, my wife made her a sandwich and forgot about how imperative it was that she cut it into triangles, and made the first cut down the middle. TLB saw this and flipped out – her world was ending…until mommy told her she was cutting her sandwich into crazy triangles. TLB was amazed, and that’s how she always requests we cut her sandwiches now.
Square and rectangular cuts do taste gross but even that is better than a sandwich I cut myself. I always get the nearest female to cut my sandwich for me so that I can eat it.
Oh no! I’m the only person who cuts their sandwich in half horizontally! I think I’m also the first British person to respond. Coincidence…?! On different breads, I prefer different crusts. Cheap white bread quite often has a less nice top, so I eat that first. Home made bread usually has a nice top, so I eat it last. Cutting it in half horizontally makes sure I don’t accidentally eat all the best bit first. I do cut my cheese (or whatever) toasties in half diagonally, but I think that’s because the old fashioned toasty machines always cut them diagonally. If it’s a grilled cheese sandwich (not a toasty), I still cut it in half horizontally. The exception is cucumber sandwiches, which should always be cut into triangles.
When I was a kid, my mom always told me that the crust had more nutrients in it and I should eat it. It’s amazing how old I was before I actually thought hard about that statement and realized… no it doesn’t! It’s just the cooked outside part! :smack:
