(Spoilers ahoy for those who haven’t seen the *Bourne *movies!)
Marie in The Bourne Supremacy. She was completely shafted by shitty writing. Also, Bourne was a complete bonehead to look her up at the end of Identity. He’d already sent her away to protect her once. WTF happened to that plan? Why would he suddenly think that she would be safe around him? You’d think he’d be smart enough to realize that *someone *might come looking for his ass. I stopped watching at the point where she’s killed, and never returned to the series after that, it pissed me off so badly.
What would I do to save her? I would send a note to her Greek hangout saying: “Remember that Bourne dude? If he shows his face around here, tell him to bugger off and *stay *buggered off.”
Wesley Wyndham-Price does not fall victim to a master sorcerer by trying to use magic against him. Instead, he whips out a sawed-off Mossberg and splats his head just like Illyria did. Wes shows up ready for battle at the end and makes a crack about needing a bigger gun. Gunn protests. “Hey what am I, chopped liver? Well, actually…” Wes busts out a bazooka and totally steals Angel’s thunder regarding slaying the dragon.
I would also definitely save Bennett from Dollhouse. The scene would be similar except Topher would come in as Whiskey is raising the gun. Topher would yell out a phrase that sounds like nonsense (“Cuddly puppies!”) and Whiskey falls to the ground. In the chaos, she escapes but so do Bennett and Topher so they can make cute little socially awkward babies together.
I wanted to see an Alien Vs. Predator sequel in which that huge awesome Queen easily snaps the chain off her leg, swims back up to the surface and sets up a nest on the boat the humans came in on. The lone survivor tries driving the boat back to Australia but falls asleep on the bridge and wakes up with a dead facehugger in front of her…
Yeah, the story arc of Breaking Bad required him to be killed. But as a fellow chemist nerd, I really, really wanted him to live. Plus he was almost entirely innocent of all the ugliness and brutality of the meth cartel that he worked for. And he was so charmingly nerdy!
On top of that - Jesse! Poor Jesse was the pawn manipulated into killing him. And it broke him up. I just want an alternate universe where I can give both of them a big hug, and say “Hey. Get out of this business. You’re both good men.”
Of course Jesse is still alive, but he just needs a father figure, damn it! And Gale - I want to hang out in his nerdy bachelor pad, drink tea, and listen to Italian operas on vinyl. What a great nerd, a real shame he had to get shot in the face.
You know those guys, the last survivors of the massacre of bad guys in the Bond films, who take one last shot at Bond in the last scene of the movie before Bond floats off the the babe for some horizontal R&R?
I wanna save the first of those guys, though without research I don’t recall which one that is. But saving the first one means Bond ends up dead, and the rest are saved too.
I’d want to save Kutner too. And Amber, certainly. Come to think of it, I don’t think there was a single death on House that didn’t annoy me. The one character they *should *have killed off was Thirteen, as she was the one with the fatal disease, and she somehow walked away and instead went off to the Caribbean (or whatever it was) with her hot girlfriend.
I’m going to provide Valeria from Conan the Barbarian a decent piece of torso armour. Snake has a headache, Valeria is saved. Conan and Valeria go off into the sunset with a bag of cash. All good.
Marcus. I’d pop in when he’s only mostly drained by the machine, where he’s still at a point where he could recover, but still given enough. I mean, Susan could have at least boinked him once.
Movie-Jean isn’t comics-Jean, and I’m sure she knows how to use her powers better than you do. If she felt she could only shield the Blackbird from outside, she was probably right.
That said, the way to save her is to keep the dam from breaking in the first place. Just stay out of Magneto’s way while you do it.
I’m on board with the Kirk plan, but Rhymer Enterprises rules do not allow for the killing of children under any circumstances, up to and including “the kid is destined to become the Anti-Christ.”
You can borrow a Phantom Zone projector an dump Geoff there once he turns 19, though.
