Pretty sure that question was conclusively resolved at the point where the family accepted the ashes from the crematorium.
Really? I wasn’t aware.
I wouldn’t tell your friend right away, but their grandparent’s ashes are mixed with others who were cremated before them. And those cremated later at the same place will contain some of your friend’s grandparent’s ashes. You can mark the occasion as solemn as desired, but the ashes are already in party mode.
that sounds nice. I was thinking that you could divide up the ashes among the relatives/friends and disperse them while someone reads a poem. Or you could bring a bottle of wine and make a simple toast while one person pours out the ashes.
Thanks for all the suggestions, Dopers! I will send my friend a link to this thread. 
If anybody else has any advice please feel free to add to it!
Avoid the boat by using a small catapult or trebuchet to hurl the ashes into the lake. I also vote for playing “Dust In The Wind”. ifmurdered.com is a great place to find funeral ideas!
An in-law once told me that they scattered ashes in the Pacific Ocean, and they floated. This was when we were scattering my bio FiL’s ashes in the Louisiana bayous (fresh water), where they promptly sank.
A friend of my FiL bought a fresh flower wreath to float over the spot, and it capsized. “Well, I guess Al wanted to see his flowers…” 
Since his friends were all Cajuns and drunks, we adjourned to have a post-scattering kegger.
:eek:
Years ago, I saw a documentary about a guy who died of AIDS and he was cremated. However, the family and friends were shocked when the ashes arrived - it was a huge box! They had all assumed a small amount, like you would expect to fit in an urn about the size of a coffee pot. Mind you, this guy who died was quite thin and not a big guy to begin with - but I was also amazed in the film when that huge box arrived.
Just wondering for those who have experienced this, exactly how large is the box/container and does it really contain all of the ashes if it is smaller?