The recent Pit thread about false rumours got me thinking.
Are there a lot of rumours going around the boards? Any about me? Anyone I know?
Post your rumours here, and we’ll get the Dopers involved to adress them! They can’t be anything at all hurtful in the case of anyone except me. I love hearing terrible stuff about me, so go nuts as far as I’m concerned!
So, be nice to the others who didn’t start a thread and don’t mention anything too negative about them.
Now lemme have it! 
— G. Raven
I hear that Esprix bought a copy of Playboy…wonder what’s up with that!!
[sub]psssssttt
I hear this guy - we’ll just call him Mnem - is just really, really good in bed.[/sub]
Esprix simply got that copy of Hustler (gossips always get some minor facts wrong) to find out if Mnementh did indeed have a 12 inch penis (not good in bed, it’s always a LITTLE inacurate), as he was the subject of the main interview.
Ehm, ok. Lemme spell this out:
I WANT SOME REAL RUMOURS! 
— G. Raven
Sorry Morrisons, but i very much doubt you’ll have any luck on that front. Anyone fool enough [sub]Ah pity tha fool[/sub] to trundle along to this thread and post an actual rumour about an actual poster would have to big one of the biggest jackasses these boards has ever seen. Content yourself with the humourous whisperings of the bored yet witty non-jackass multitides lest it all get a bit pear-shaped.
Fran
Not if it was about me, or if it was something fairly harmless.
— G. Raven
Well, if you really want, I supposed we could start some rumors about you, Morrison.
turns to closest Doper and whispers Hey, did you hear that rumor about Morrison’s Lament and the six miniature poodles?
Strange. I heard that one too, only the was named Bird.
I’m not sure if the OP is completely serious or not, but we here at The Straight Dope have to take everything seriously.
To wit : this is not the place to post rumours about others to check their veracity. The way to deal with rumours is to go to the person privately and ask them about it. This is not going to turn into a forum for backstabbing and questionable theories about other posters personal lives.
If this thread becomes any more than just lighthearted fun I’ll shut it down faster than … um … faster than … well, I’ll shut it down real fast.
Personally, I can see nothing good coming from this, even if the postings are humorous. Thin skins and misunderstandings will turn this thread ugly damn fast if I let it go on.
Which I won’t.