Just his member? Seems a shame to waste his whole carcass.
Not funny, but in the same vein as Johnny L.A., I’m thinking of getting this sticker made up for my car:
I brake for red lights and stop signs
because I actually do, and no one else does, including the people tailgating me.
“You found God?
If no one claims him in 30 days, you can keep him.”
“If you’re going to ride my ass, at least pull my hair”
I should have bought it. I need it driving around here!
Dog is my copilot.
My favorite in college that I saw frequently (on the same car) was Save the Ales.
Others I love are: Save the Whales! Harpoon a Fat Dude and Lab Partners do it Periodically.
My buddy has a great one on his car.
It is bright yellow and in black letters it says: “Bumper Sticker.” I chuckle every time I see it.
I saw one the other day that made me laugh out loud.
“I wish my grass was emo so it would cut itself.”
November 03, 2004
Please God, make the scary man go away
“Have you tormented Satan today?”
New Orleans: proud to swim home. (Accompanied by a picture of some houses underwater.)
If we aren’t supposed to eat people, why are they made of meat?
I [spade] my cat. (Where there’s a spade in place of the traditional heart.)
Bush sucks. Dick Cheney too.
A few years back, New York State’s tourism promotion people came up with
I♥NY, which was of course short for “I Love New York.” Vermont copied this with I♥VERMONT, sometimes written I LOVERMONT. (Yeah, not funny so far.)
However, what was then done to parody it was amusing: I 
MY DOG and then I 
BABY SEALS. (Nobody seems to have figured out how to use the diamond, to finish the set.)
Many years ago I had a bumper sticker that read:
Caution, I Speed Up to Run Over Small Animals
I thought it was quite a witty saying, until one day, while traveling a tad over the posted speed limit, I did, indeed, run over a small animal. My feeling of remorse was tempered by embarrassment over my assurance that the travelers behind me must have viewed my cute little bumper sticker as being a heartless mission statement. No longer wishing to subject myself to future ridicule, I removed that offensive sticker and replaced it with a more innocuous one: *Nixon Now! *
Shame on you Dr. Poopiepants, you’d better sober up before my biopsy tomorrow. At least get dressed.
They’re very unusual Over Here. But the other day I saw one of a shark silhouette eating one of those Jesus fishes and almost ate the railing from the case of giggles it gave me.
Israel may be only one Mediterranean away from “Over Here”, but bumper stickers seemed almost as popular there as here. When I was in the homeland (late 2004) a rap group called Hadag Nachash had a song out called “Shirot Hasticker” (The Sticker Song) about all of the contrasting political bumper stickers. I loved that song, and I’ve been trying unsuccessfully to get my hands on it for a while.
These weren’t bumper stickers, but T-shirts I saw in New Orleans over ten years ago:
Louisiana: Third World and proud of it
It’s not the heat, it’s the stupidity
I wish I had a car, just so I could put that sticker on it. Awesome!