Send me a boyfriend or kill me, I care not which.

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

Gang, I’ve been single for a long time. I’ve had my liasons, my flings, my dating partners and my fun, but as far as a good, solid I-know-I-can-depend-on-you-relationship, it’s been years. I’m okay with that, I like being single. I’ve had good enough relationships that I don’t want to get into another until I have that one person that brings out the best in me. Someone I can trust implicitly. Someone that respects and loves me. Someone that REALLY likes sex. But, I digress. The point being, I was happy to wallow in my selfish, non-compromising singledom for years.
Until today.

Today is when I came down with…THE COLD! Not just any cold. No, no. The cold that makes me wish my dawg would just kill me in my sleep. The cold that makes me wish I believed in jay-zus so that he might kill me in my sleep. The cold that…what was I saying? The fever befuddled me again.

Ah, yes…THE COLD!
I’ve been building up to it for a few days now. Managed to feel okay on Friday and Saturday, due in part to the wonderful male company I had. By Saturday night, I was done fighting it. ChiDope was no good for me, to say the least. I sat on a chair at VB’s place and grunted at people if they got too close. By Sunday, I was a wreck. Wavering between passing out and begging thinksnow to stay another week just to make sure I don’t drown in the bathtub. Monday, again, not so good, but feeling like I might live to fight another day. Today…today has been hell. I’m out of meds, I’m NOT leaving the house to get them, and now I can’t @!#%&*@! sleep! I’m miserable, I’ve been crying, and I would GIVE UP SLEEPING DOWN THE MIDDLE OF THE BED TO HAVE SOMEONE BRING ME SOME SOUP!

Yes, it’s reached that point. I am willing to give up half of my life, my money and my closet space so that I can have someone to whine and bitch to in close proximity. Someone that will bring me tea and toast, someone that will change the sheets, someone that will keep me from eating butter straight from the tub because that’s all I have the energy to fix.

There you have it, gang. Real life true confessions. Line forms to the left, make sure you bring the lotioned Kleenex, ability to look at me with no makeup a plus.

2

fits criteria

signs up

3

SOLD TO THE OZZIE!

I knew starting threads in the middle of the night would have benefits.

4

Do we ask the mods to close the thread now?

5

Well, I’m in the Navy, so I have an excuse for being up this late… :slight_smile:

FWIW, I went up north to visit the fam a few months back. My brother had prearranged a blind date for me. Not really blind; I knew what she looked like, and I really wanted to see her. I got there a few days before the date. I immediately got that pre-sick, vaguely achy feeling, probably what you were feeling Fri & Sat. I was pissed. My brother, whose shelves are filled with bottles of pills that I can’t pronounce, gave me a bunch (green powdery ones… oregano, i think… big horse-type ones that made me gag trying to get them down, and more) every day, and by Fri (three days later), I was fine! I couldn’t believe it. Never thought it would work. Almost convinced me to go out and buy the pills I’d been taking, for next time, but then I had this vision of my shelves stocked with hundreds of bottles of weird pills, and, well, I just never got around to it.

Just thought I’d share that. Hope you feel better soon!

6

::tapping little wifely foot::

dpr!!

It is time to come home now! You leave poor Nym alone. You are not for sale!

7

:::: bang :::::

:::: flees :::::

8

nymysys . . .

Well, seeing as I am right next door in the SD People Pages I guess the least I could do would bring you some soup.

Ummmmm, make that “e-soup”.

Will that help ? No ? Damn.

How about sympathy ? I am very sorry you feel so bad, we all here at the SDMB hope you get better very soon. I am sending positive vibes your way. It sucks to be sick and alone. Poor, poor nymysys.

Get well soon.

  • NM

(note sig)

9

Nymysys, I’m sorry for the trouble my co-patriots are causing you… one playing with your affections and the other shooting you… I dunno, I really don’t…

walks away sadly

10

SOLD TO THE OZZIE!

I knew starting threads in the middle of the night would have benefits.**
[/quote]

GAH! Totally bogus! This it the thanks I get for keeping you from a sudsy death in the tub or from wasting away to nothing from lack of s’mores!

<sigh>

Fine, take your waterlogged kangaDoper…I guess I’ll just vist other folks in Chi-town next time I’m up there.

<shuffling towards the door, dejectedly>

[Corrected coding snauf–TVeblen]

[Edited by TVeblen on 03-15-2001 at 12:40 AM]

11

Yes, I meant for that entire post to be bolded. I’m emotional here, folks. :rolleyes:

12

::gets in line to the left::

Yeah, it’s freakin’ cold up here too. [Queen]Find me sombody to love . . [/Queen] [Rolling Stones]Anybody seen my baby?[/Rolling Stones] Find me a chick while yer at it. . .

Tripler
Damn snow.

13

(Nods in complete understanding and sympathy.)

Don’t you just hate all of those movies and stuff where the sick person gets all cuddled and pampered in bed by their wonderfully sympathetic significant other? I’ve not found too many such people in real life and my last two girlfriends not only couldn’t cook, but had little patience being around someone with a bad cold.

Which is one reason why they are ex-girl friends.

Suggestion. Force drink lots of fluids, even just water. Low energy? Try mixing in a teaspoon of sugar. Got vitamins? Take a bunch. Got cash in the house? Order delivery food. Chinese restaurants have great soups. No meds? Pharmacies often will deliver.

I used to watch these great movies as a kid where the hero got sick and the SO stayed by his or her bedside for days, lovingly watching every move or motion, fluffing pillows, gently restraining fever thrashing, sponging off the brow, feeding sips of fluid, cleaning them up if they vomit, escorting them to the toilet (though, in those old movies, apparently a sick person never used the can for days at a time.)

Then, when he or she recovered enough came the lovingly fixed meals in bed, flowers at the bedside, being checked on frequently (the SO never worked or had places to be), and no grudges were ever harbored if the sick person had acted rudely while ‘out of it.’

Today? HA!
Ha ha ha!
Ha-ha-ha-ha!!!

(Wipes tears of laughter out of eyes.) Yeah! Right!

If they can’t ship you off to the hospital, then you aint really sick. Bark at them when somewhat delirious and you’ll be reminded of it forever. If you’re a guy, you’d better be able to rise up out of the sick bed and do something manly like build a house with IV tubes in both arms and a heart monitor beeping away.

Shoot! You don’t even get that old time wonderful level of care in a hospital today!

If you find the right guy, ask him if he has a sister and then e-mail me. I’ll be interested.

A couple of years ago, I got that nasty flue and my girlfriend was sympathetic and patient for about half a day, then wore herself out being empathetic, suddenly decided she was sick and needed attention and went home when I didn’t rise out of my bed to attend to her. We communicated by phone for several days, and I must say, she was the healthiest sick chick I’ve ever run into. We didn’t last long after that.

Good luck! Eat lots of chicken soup! Chow down on Vitamin C! A good hot toddy now and then helps a whole bunch.

I once weathered a serious flue with a bottle of bourbon, a couple of bottles of vitamins, a jar of honey and gallons of hot tea! (Actually, I just got so drunk that I didn’t know I was sick.)

14

Here I am, baby.

15

Like you, I relish my independence, but really, I don’t always like having to be independent every waking moment of every day. I’ve had 2 specific incidents in the last year where I really needed to be taken care of.
[ul]
[li]Nothing says pathetic lonely loser more than taking a taxi to the suburban emergency room. Last September, my herniated disc (L5S1) was flaring up and I needed some good painkillers. Except no one is around to take me. So I call ed a taxi. The unsympathetic staff at the ER doesn’t even give me any good drugs (“Sorry, there’s nothing we can really do…” as I am sitting there crying like a baby from frustation, not from pain. Apparently, if you can ask for Demerol, you’re not in enough pain to need it.) I leave in about the same condition as I arrived, again in a taxi. I was on disability leave for two weeks because I couldn’t sit in a chair for longer than 10 or 15 minutes without being in pain. I really needed some TLC, but there was no one around who cared to administer it.[/li][li]The Eight Day Migraine. The day after Xmas last year, I got hit with a killer migraine - the worst I’d had in 10 years. And since I’m all alone, I still have to do things like walk the dog, feed the dog, feed the cats, etc. I was throwing up regularly after the first 12 hours, and after that, my favorite - the dry heaves. Every time I moved. I can’t believe I could be in that much pain and not be dying. I specifically remember walking the dog and having the dry heaves simultaneously, while my skull throbbed in excrutiating pain. This migraine will not let up, and I can’t even keep water down, much less pain killers. On day two, I call a girlfriend to take me to the ER. One IV drip and two doses of Demerol later, I’m back home, feeling signficantly better, but no where near good. Luckily my company shuts down betwen Xmas and New Year’s, so at least I’m not taking time off work. I’m popping Vicodin like candy. And I’m once again alone. A week later, I was finally back to normal.[/li][/ul]
And to add insult to injury, I can’t even get laid on a regular basis.

16

WTF?! Hey, isn’t it bad enough Nymy disses me for a flooded-out dpr? What the heck did I do to you?
[sub]BTW, Southwest has some incredible deals going on right now for travel, but you’ll have to act fast. $60 roundtrip to/from Chicago![/sub]

17

You will NOT! Looks like dpr isn’t allowed to come out to play, anyway. Methinks the wife is looking a bit frothy around the mouth.

Update: Still feel like I might die, but it’s nice to know people care, or at least commiserate. Trying to walk the dawg, feed and bathe myself, go to work and all the other little necesssitites of life while feeling like the black death has you…well, it’s no fun. Being able to rant helps, though. Being able to rant in person [sub]$60 round-trip, eh…?[/sub] is priceless. Damn you lucky’uns with SO’s to coddle you. I’m jealous. Sick AND jealous now. Thanks.

18

Aw, Nyms, baby…I am so sorry you are feeling crummy. But at least you haven’t lost your sense of humor!

I am sending you a great big mug of tea, with honey and lemon and a shot of brandy…purely for medicinal purposes, of course! :slight_smile:

flyboy88, the herb you speak of may have been Echinacea.

(((((Nyms))))

Scotti

19

::MikeG pulls up a chair, adjusts his glasses and pulls out his old book of stories::
<ahem>

There once was a woman who lived in a nice little house on a quiet side street. One day there came a terrible flood and as the waters rose, she moved first from her ground floor, abandoning her computer and Winnie the Pooh keyboard to seek safety in the upper floors. Yet the waters continued to rise. A man rowed by in a boat and asked her if she needed help, but the woman merely replied "A boyfriend will come along and save me"!

Later, as she ended up on the roof, the man rowed by and asked agian if she needed some assistance. This time, the woman said “you may take my wonderful doggie and save her, but A boyfirend will save me”! So the man took the doggie and removed her to a safe place with lots of parks and new trees to sniff.
Yet later, the man rowed by again. This time the poor woman had gotten a terrible cold from having ther feet in the icy water that swirled around the eaves of the roof she was sitting on. He pleaded with her to come with him and be saved, but still she refused! “A boyfriend will save me”!
Finally the man stopped coming by, for he had found a woman who needed a helping friend and he was far too busy to keep rowing all the way to her far off house.

Then the woman was swept away and drowned.

When she got to heaven, she complained bitterly to God saying, "Why did you not send me a boyfriend??
God replied, “you silly little girl, did you think that guy rowing by yor house was out on a pleasure cruise”?

Isn’t that a wonderful story?
Now eat your soup and go to bed.

20

So maybe it’s a good thing i didn’t make it to the Chidope on Sat night.So what kind of soup would you like me to bring over?