Why only night-time alien abductions?
Dammit, I usually plan better than this!
Well, it’s hard to schedule around alien abductions.
IMHO:
Any shy people here?
**is childhood really so bad? **
**What to Do With 4.5 Pounds of Lousy Beef?
Do You Know Of Any Great Versions of the Aristocrats Jokes?
I love it when you talk gravy to me
**
**I’m in Texas!
“I went to Harvard. Did I Mention I Went To Harvard?” **
How does that saying go? “If a man is from Harvard or Texas, he’ll find a way of letting you know”?
I’d like to hear a congressman
The value of an Iraqi life: $15,000. What a bargain!
That’s surprisingly honest, congressman
What’s the coolest thing you’ve seen your Mom or Dad do?
Sexually explicit junk mail
I’ll call the therapist.
**Incest: How close is too close?
What’s your favorite position **
Ew.
**What are your biggest restaurant complaints?
I contaminated the soup?!
**
** Define America’s “Blood Sport”
Investment Options
**
**How is dating different in your 30s than in your 20s?
Sexually explicit junk mail **
**What Celebrity Could You Be?
Is Drew Carey a straightdoper? **
** Incest: How close is too close?
How is dating different in your 30s than in your 20s?
Cool things you hope will happen in your lifetime
A New and Different Oreo Debate
The proper way to beat your wife
Can you use Chopsticks?
Stalin-Era Mass Grave Discovered Near Kremlin
First sign of the apocalypse **
** The most frightening TV show - ever -
Pushing Daisies
**
**Celebrities in post-apocalyptic fiction
Tom Cruise’s $10M Survival Bunker **
**How is dating different in your 30s than in your 20s?
Did you have to share a room?
**
No, thank Og. By the time I was in my 30s I didn’t need roomies anymore.
** Name my pathetic patch of chest hair
I’m going bald (down there)
**
** How is dating different in your 30s than in your 20s?
So, how’s your perimenopause treatment going?
**
**Do you have the right to be proud of anything
The proper way to beat your wife
**
What is Tapioca?
Evidence for the Bible
My linen closet is smelly 
Woman Finds Mouse Head In Can Of Green Beans . . .
**Funny/clever place names
999 Letsby Avenue **
Funny/clever only if you get it, mind
How do you say “MPSIMS”?
My linen closet is smelly
Ah. One of these “Throatwarbler Mangrove” things, then.
**
Will men’s shorts ever be too big?
Are You A Fast Pisser?
Are they TOO quick replacing balls in the MLB? **
Way TMI there