I’m sorry, it was a formal date?
So what you are saying is that you have learned a lot about being the hired help.
Seems like the cart pushing the horse. Uppity butler attitude, etc.
Well this one had milk, and served it, apparently. If the bar has no problem with the order, why should anyone else?
Drinking milk in a bar, though understandably disconcerting to a wine-lover, is not a sign of ignorance, rudeness, or immaturity, and only an idiot would think otherwise.
Now don’t misunderstand me here: If I was one of them fancy-pants beer/wine connoisseur type folk, then yes, I’d dump that milk drinkin’ broad faster than youc’n spit. This is really fairly obvious. Why continue dating someone who is oblivious to things that you care deeply about? I think most of all us can following this reasoning. The problem is, it shouldn’t go any further. While milk is an inappropriate drink if you want to date a winer-lover, it is not an inappropriate drink for a bar under normal circumstances. Not at all. Not in the slightest. What I drink is, after all, no one’s business but my own. If other people want to feel superior to me because milk happens to be my favorite beverage (unless the milk-shake is also considered a beverage), then that’s their own shit-brained choice.
Now I, for one, fully expect that this will happen, that the dimwits will judge me in their own dimwitted ways. That’s the natural order of things. What’s driven this thread and the last isn’t just stupidity, though, but also the pigheaded condescension that’s accompanied it. What we have here is one of the finest amalgams of arrogance and idiocy I’ve ever come across. I might just bookmark these pages to have a ready reference of the lengths to which some people will go to feel superior to others.
If the bar had it you are correct. I could care less what someone is drinking in a bar or anywhere else. However, based on my experience in the business I would have to question the freshness of the milk and the odds a bar would have milk since it isn’t something a bartender would use. Cream or half and half, yes. Milk, no.
Do you see anything in the OP that suggests that the bar had a problem with the order? If not, what are you on about?
Indeed!
The story was presented as if to say, “See what she missed out on because she was ‘unsophisticated’?” Or rather, “This is the price you pay for not knowing the [so-called] ‘proper’ drink to order.”
Shagnasty assumed that we’d all agree that it was bad, bad, bad, for this girl to “miss out” on dating Mr. GotBux, and that she paid a price for her oafish, simpleton ways (not dating Mr. GotBux).
If the story had been presented to merely tell us how two non-compatable people met, went out, and decided that they were not suited for each other, fine. But that wasn’t the reason the story was told. It was a cautionary tale. But a caution against what? Being rejected by someone who has nothing in common with you? Some rather pretentious snobby person? Weeding out such people is a good thing, not a bad thing. The girl in the story missed out on nothing, yet Shagnasty obviously feels that she did, and that her own (oafish, simpleton) behavior caused an unwelcome and sad consequence to occur. The rest of us think that nothing unwelcome or sad occured—indeed, we think that she dodged a bullet, and that nothing bad happened to her, indeed, something good happened to her. And also, she didn’t do anything wrong. That’s where the disconnect occurs here.
Please. I stated before that you seemed very much a nouvelle snob and it appear I was pretty much on the mark. Yes at some very high end affairs you might (note I stated might) need to display certain behaviors–I don’t think anyone here has really stated otherwise. However in case you can’t keep up with the conversation we are talking about going to a bar for a drink on a date, which certainly is not comparable to attending a extremely exclusive affair. So someone ordering a coke or milk or some other silly drink is not breaking any societal rules and you damn well know it isn’t. I think you are just enjoying yanking chains here, when it is very clear you have not the faintest idea of class at all.
As an Architect I work with both extremes of society and my take on it is that in general–people are people. Some of the CEO’s of major companies I have worked with are the most casual about these ‘rules’. The only person at an exclusive affair who looks funny is the nouvelle snob trying to fit in and making sure he is following the rules.
You seem to equate things with class that rarely have anything to do with class–my sense is you wouldn’t know class if you saw it.
See, **I ** woulda said “you wouldn’t know class if it jumped up and bit you on the dick. Assuming it could find it.”
That’s how I know Hakuna has class.
I guess I see nothing in the OP to indicate the order was filled. I also have a hard time believing that anyone who has been in a bar would actually order milk in such a place. Think about it. If you wanted to relate a story in which you intend to make one of the parties look as unsophisticated as possible, what would you say they ordered in a bar?
But then again, what do I know. I’m sure someone somewhere has gone in a bar and asked for milk. I just find the entire story very odd. I understand the vitriol expressed about how some people have taken a very snobbish attitude in this thread. I just thought someone else would notice how unlikely this entire scenario sounds.
Well, that type of story wouldn’t be very interesting now would it? I just posted that in the related foodie thread as an afterthought because I always that it was cute. I am surprised people took a unique interest in it. It just seems like common sense to me.
Suzie didn’t lose anything. She is a sweet, happily married person now. John, on the other hand is still a multi-millionaire but has some serious oddity issues and I would be the first to try to talk her out of it if it did start to go somewhere. That behavior is classic Suzie however. I certainly think that it is not a good idea to suit yourself in the foot with some off the wall uncouth behavior just because the impulse strikes. It may be handy to use that setting as a training excercise.
There are plenty of things that I am not interested in but I know that people I will be around are passionate about. Golf and NASCAR are two common examples. I don’t pretend to be an expert on it or a life-long fan but I do try to see things from their eyes for a while and try to experience some of the joy from it. That is called being a polite host or guest and trying to broaden your world a little. Different food and drink fit into that category.
Well, its easy to say now that somebody else mentioned it first, but I gotta say I detected a bit of movement on my bullshit-o-meter when first reading the tale. Can’t believe the thread made it to page 5 before somebody called it.
That’s what I was more or less implying in all my previous posts. That and the fact such an absurd topic has gone on this long.
I think the original story, as presented, implied that she did. It implied that there were consequences to not knowing the “proper” way to behave. From what you’re now saying, the consequences for Suzie were that she didn’t waste time dating an odd guy that you never would have encouraged her to date seriously in the first place. So, drinking the milk seems like a completely awesome idea, in that context, does it not?
And you left that detail out until now. Interesting.
I think that a lot of people are going to dispute the drinking of milk as “off the wall, uncouth” behavior. All she did is do something that turned off an oddball that she would have never been happy dating in the first place. An oddball who decides someone is unsuitable based on her choosing to drink milk.
Heh. You ain’t seen nothing yet.
I don’t know about up there in New York City but down around these parts bars serve coffee. Some people take milk in their coffee. Some people drink scotch and milk. Every bar I have ever worked in (excluding beer halls) has stocked milk. Is this really an such exotic concept for you style mavens?
I don’t know what to say except that it really happened. If you knew the people involved, the fact that it went as described would be self-evident. The reason it probably seems cliche now is because SDMB pundits have been dissecting it for over 200 posts. I have never heard a similar story in my life.
If I knew a story about a girl ridiculed for choosing diet Coke over diet Pepsi, I don’t think that I would have seen a reason to post it.
Judging by the responses in this thread, I think we can all expect to see a rash of people ordering all kinds of things in bars and nice restaurants. You won’t even need a Straight Dope tee-shirt to find fellow dopers anymore. Just look for the guy or girl in the sports bar huddled up the counter with a carton of chocolate milk and a mustache.
Ok. So that’s partly where I get hung up on this story. My experience working in bars has shown me that they stock cream or half and half for coffee drinkers and the odd drink that requires dairy products. So in your experience they stocked milk for the same purpose. Fine. But the story is set in a wine bar. In New York City.
I for one have a hard time imagining they would have milk or have patrons who expect them to have milk. Thus, my difficulty in buying into the premise to begin with.
And I’m not sure who the style mavens are you refer to. I could care less if someone orders milk in a bar. I just think it unlikely they will have it. To me it would be like a story about someone ordering a Big Mac at Taco Bell. It doesn’t seem likely to happen.
The style mavens are the ones in this thread who contend that ordering milk in a bar is inappropriate behavior.
I am not sure I understand why a wine and beer bar would *only * serve wine and beer. Can a seafood restaurant not serve chicken? In fact, I would be willing to bet that you would be hard pressed to find a self-described “wine and beer” that served *nothing * but wine and beer.
Nowhere in the OP was it suggested that asking for milk caused a problem for the establishment; it only discomfited the man in the story. The OP himself has attested to the truth of the story. Try it for yourself. The next time you are out having a drink, ask them if they have milk.