I am in the recovery phase of a 5 day+ head cold. This nasty bug has left me reeling from the abrupt “secret ninja attack” style sneezes (AKA the devastating ones you never saw coming), and from the copious amounts of snot coming out of my head. I mean, there’s so much that the trash can next to my desk is beginning to bring new meaning to the term “snot bucket.”
So just a few minutes ago, I’m blowing my nose for something like the 30th time this morning. The tissue (actually teepee harvested from the workplace bathroom) is of the single-ply, dry and scratchy variety, and does a poor job of receiving and containing the substantial glob of clear and somewhat runny mucus ejected from my nostrils. I wipe up as best I can with the tissue’s unsullied but fragile edges. As I reach over to drop it in the trash can, a little bit of the goo that oozed through the waif-like paper sticks to my ring finger. I watch bemused as the tissue falls in typical slow-mo fashion, mucus-side down, onto the right toe of my favorite Airwalk sneakers.
I reach down and gingerly lift the tissue, placing it deliberately in the trash can. There is a glob of snot left on my shoe, a distinct clear mark against the dusty black suede. It’s kind of shiny and reflects light - hey! It looks just like the trail a snail would leave behind on some asphalt! Cool…
It’s drying as I’m typing this, in the shape of a tommy gun. I think I’ll keep it. 
Anyone else have interesting snot-shape stories to share? Conduct divination from the shape of your snot? Regularly examine your snot to determine color/viscosity/place of origin?
Yes I’m a freak, but I’m also a freak with chronic sinus infection…regularity informs habit, don’tcha know.