Shark Attacks increasing due to Exploding Seal Population

I heard this on NPR today…

… and my inner 10-year-old imediately interpreted it this way:


Clap Clap Clap — BOOM!

Come to thnk of it, if we really did have an exploding seal poopulation, that’d prety much take care of the shark problem, wouldn’t it?

I think I read something about this awhile back, SEAL Meat 6 perhaps?

There is a problem with white pointer attacks on our beaches. In saying that though, about a dozen people are killed a year at the most and we have lots of beaches.

I’ve not seen a seal here- exploding or otherwise.

That’s how they want it. They sneak up on you, then … BOOM

Every blown seal explodes if it’s done right.

Looks like you blew a seal

Nah, that’s just a little ice cream.

You must have misheard. Are you sure they didn’t say “Shark Attacks on the rise due to exploding seal population?”

Is that why they club the baby ones, to keep them from getting all explody?

It’s why I never go out drinking with sharks. They break their seals way too early in the evening.

Only if it is an imbeseal.

The exploding seal population in New England waters is having other effects:
-decline of fishing…seals can eat up to 100 lbs. of fish per day-the local fishermen are losing their cod and haddock fishery
-contaminated beaches. Seal poop is rich in coliform bacteria…many beaches on Cape Cod have been closed due to this.
I hope the sharks make a dent in the seal population.

Makes sense. If I were a shark, I’d go after a human w/o explosives over a seal that has high explosives.