They found a woman and her triplets dead. Apparently, she tried to give birth at home unassisted. It seems incredible anyone would be foolish enough to try this. It’s such a senseless tragedy.
Back in the 70’s I worked with a woman who swears she didn’t know she was pregnant until her labor started. She said she’d always had irregular periods, and she only gained a few pounds. She was a large woman, which might explain why nobody else noticed either.
Not all women are “in touch” with their bodies. Morning sickness, tender breasts and the other symptoms of pregnancy can go unnoticed. And some might be in denial.
The thing is, I have always been hyper aware of that sort of thing…probably from terror that I might actually catch pregnant. I am befuddled by women who don’t know. I am always aware of the changes my period brings about in me, for example, and if they don’t fit the usual, I pay close attention. I would know immediately if something was wrong.
AuntiePam is right of course. Not everyone pays such close attention. But it still weirds me out.
Some might not even have any symptoms such as morning sickness, tender breasts, cravings for certain foods, what have you. I certainly didn’t, and there were semi-logical explanations for other symptoms (UTI for frequent trips to the bathroom in the last month or so of the pregnancy, gas/GI upset for the fluttering belly at around the same time). I gained maybe 10 pounds at most, which was my normal “winter gain” and just never looked pregnant.
It simply never occurred to me I might be pregnant, especially given the lack of obvious pregnancy symptoms, the presence of what I thought were my normal periods every 3 months or so, and being told that polycystic ovaries make it difficult to become pregnant without intervention.
I found out I was pregnant when I went to the doctor for the supposed UTI and had my cesarean about 3 weeks later. My daughter was about 6 weeks premature but otherwise very healthy despite the complete lack of prenatal care (thank goodness).
But what if they do fit the usual? As noted, I had a period roughly every 3 months which is normal for me, and there was absolutely nothing notably different.
The key part of the story that makes the rest not make sense is the babies being at full term. Maybe someone with more peds experience could chime in here-- could the babies have been unnaturally large due to swelling or some other kind of condition? Or maybe the emergency services folk were mistaken and assumed that tiny babies were full-term for multiple births, or made some other kind of statement about the babies and were misquoted? (For instance, “the babies were fully formed” as opposed to what you get with an early miscarriage?)
If she didn’t think she was at full term, then having mild contractions wouldn’t have been any cause for alarm; even strong painful ones would just mean “go to the hospital soon” rather than a sign for panic. Once she had strong contractions, she may not have been able to find the phone, or get to it, to call 911. Really, I’m not surprised that a woman in hard labor might find herself unable to get around or think coherently; that’s a pretty stressful situation to find yourself in.
I’m actually wondering more why she didn’t tell her folks she was pregnant; she was 27 years old and already had two children, surely her mom wasn’t going to be disappointed that she was having sex, or something?
I am the same way. The fact that something that big could be going on inside me and I would not know freaks me out.
I actually knew someone who was almost 6 months along before they found out they were pregnant. She was a large women, but not super-obese or anything. When they asked her what she thought when she felt the baby moving, she said she thought it was gas. :smack: This woman was a lawyer, too. :eek:
Well that helps me understand a little (not that it’s your job at all to make me understand, but I appreciate it).
I admit I am very lucky…for years my schedule has been like clockwork. Seriously, if I paid attention I probably could set a clock by it…it probably even is the same hour of the day, every time.
No kidding. Likewise, IDK what I’d do if I caught the pregnant.
A friend asked why that I Didn’t Know I Was Pregnant show is so popular. I pointed out that it is because that is every woman’s number one fear- the ones who want babies? Well, they are now worried bc baby didn’t get prenatal care. The ones like me who DON’T want babies? Oh, Jesus. That would suck SO SO SO hard.
My sister is an OB nurse. They occasionally have women who claim they didn’t know they were pregnant. Mostly they are mentally ill. Some even cling to their claim that they are virgins.
Yeah, a surprise baby is never fun. I can’t imagine the shock of–oh, now you have a baby to give birth to.
I actually just read a YA book last week called “After,” about a girl who’s about fifteen or sixteen and is in denial about it. She goes into labor on her own and has no clue she was pregnant and ends up in shock throwing the baby in a garbage can–it’s rescued but she’s charged w/ attempted murder. It’s a novel, but it still made me wonder about the thought process. This girl’s mom had her at a young age and I think she was in denial because she didn’t want that same thing to happen to her. Scary.
Well, when you’ve had gas before and it feels like gas and there’s no reason to think “baby,” I’d say it’s not so silly to think it was gas. Of course, I’m biased towards the “that doesn’t mean I’m stupid” viewpoint. Plus she really wasn’t that active until right at the end.
I confess I hung up the phone and burst into tears when I received the results and felt just so trapped to discover not only was I pregnant, but I was VERY pregnant. (At the time of my first ultrasound, my due date was about a month and a half away, and then I wound up with an emergency C-section 3 weeks later.)
I had never wanted children, was relieved that I had a condition that would make it unlikely that I’d get pregnant, and never had felt any twinges of regret about my clock running.
However, now? My daughter has enriched my life in so many ways. Maybe the pregnancy caused a biochemical lobotomy of some sort, but she was the happiest accident I’ve ever had. I do think I could have gone the rest of my life without having children with no problem at all, but I wouldn’t have known what I was missing.
Lord knows I’m the last person on earth to ever tell someone what they should do as far as kids/no kids, but speaking for myself, I’m actually glad it happened this way - where it was all done lickety-split with a good result and no time to agonize or worry for months on end.
I missed my first trimester. I’d been trying to get pregnant for years, had stopped trying and didn’t have the most regular of periods - plus my mind was on other things - we were in the middle of adopting.
I don’t think I could have missed the pregnancy completely - I gained 60 pounds (and only weighed 130 to start with) - mostly water, blew up like a whale, and seemed to be growing a future soccer player.
I’ve seen that program advertised on TV, but never watched it - I just find the whole topic totally mind-boggling. When my wife was pregnant, not only did she know it but so did anyone else within eyesight!
I have a friend who found out she was pregnant at around seven or eight months. She was a very active athlete, and for all the reasons already put forth, it just didn’t occur to her that there was a baby in there. She was no dummy, either - circumstances just fell into place for her to not figure it out earlier. People like her are why there are so many pregnancy tests done before medical procedures - she wouldn’t have lied to a doctor on purpose - she just didn’t know.
Typo, thank you so much for answering! Maybe you should start an “Ask me” thread. This is fascinating.
But I do want to ask about the “no reason to think baby” - I mean I assume there was sex involved somewhere, unless it was the Second Coming. I am sexually active and it’s on my mind fairly often…not overtly, but just an unconscious sort of check. Oh, this makes me sound like I’m always thinking and worrying about pregnancy! I’m not, really! …but if I’ve had sex, it’s not out of my mind either.
Same here, Anaamika–I always look out for my period if I know I’m sexually active and if it’s been four weeks and I’m late, I get a little freaked out. (I know, you’re supposed to chart it all the time, technically, but I don’t really keep strict track of mine, esp. if I’m not having sex. If not, I usually get light cramps the day or a few hours before, which let me know it’s coming soon but apart from that, I don’t mark it on the calendar.)
As noted, I had a period roughly every 3 months which is normal for me, and there was absolutely nothing notably different.