She even [i]looks[/i] like Captain Janeway

It’s the woman hater part

Oh my god, this has to be one of the most awkward ways ever to start a Star Trek type thread.

Where did you find this?

One day, I was walking through the middle of a grocery store aisle, pushing a cart full of mangos. I like mangos almost as much as I like guava. I can’t stand bananas. Sometimes, I have trouble deciding when to stop writing “na” as I’m spelling out banana and the word becomes amazingly long.

Anyways…, as I’m pushing this cart down the middle of the aisle in the grocery store, a small child runs up to me and says, “Momma! Buy me this!”

Now, I don’t look much like a woman, even if you put me in a dress, so I was perplexed as to why this munchkin of a human was calling me Momma.

Well, the kid finally actually looks up at me, he screams bloody murder. This alarms all the middle aged women in stirrups and turtleneck sweaters with tiny little gold chains around their necks, most of which have tiny crosses on them, i guess symbolizing that they’re Christian. Unless there is a new fashion going around that I don’t know of since I rarely read Glamour anymore.

Thes aforementioned women, convinced by the child’s screams that I was harming, or at least, molesting the beast, proceeded to offer scornful looks at me, apparantly having trained their faces to be lethal weapons. This was enough to free the blithering human larva from my non existant grasp and he ran away into the arms of an overweight young woman in sweats and sneakers, who I assumed to be his “Momma.”

Turns out, it was the Horta and the child sufferred a horrible death. Long live Star Trek.

Hey! Where’s Wearia with the new Enterprise episode thread?

Yeah…Come to think of it, that’s why I’m poking around in here. Gotta peek at the Panda!

See? If I put Enterprise and Star Trek in a thread’s post, the Trekkers start to show up. Yeay!

Carny, did you see it yet?

Stigma is the episode name.

C’m’on, man! i NEEDZ me the new thread! I might get jumpy and start my own!! (premature Enterprisulation)

Wait, I’m still on the shopping carts and screaming children. What the hell is this thread about, anyway? And who brought the brain?

All I know is, I saw “Janeway” in the title and came in to bitch about her, only to discover that she is but a minor feature in this broiling cauldron of weirdness. I’m so confused.

Some idiot (wonder who?) at my house set the temporal displacement incorredtly on the Trek/Canadian/Time Machine, and I only taped the last part,so I’m waiting to see the who thing tonight, commercials and all. ^:(^

PIck the rest of the crew

Harry Vincent is obviously Harry Kim. Earnest but kind of, well, naive.

But, does he play the clarinet? Cause that’s really the important thing.
Sorry to hear about the troubles with your Canadian time machine, carni. I’d blame it on Crewman Daniels.

Sneaky bastard.

The Who thing? Trip has a really long scarf? The Armory is bigger on the inside than it is on the outside? Daleks show up? (Now, that might work…) K9?
-Rue. (confused)

The temporal C Band Canadian DVB thingie has obviously damaged my spell checker.
Daniels, you SOB.

I was just trying a very round about way to mention Star Trek in a thread.

I knew that anyone searching “Trek” would hit on this thread and then we could all party.

Woo Hoo!

See youse all after work, I got a real Janeway* of a room to repaper.

I like the Daleks getting Trip pregnant idea, btw…

*bitch, of course

You don’t suppose Daniels is a Dalek in drag, or that…
What have I done?

And the rest is history…

Poor, poor thread. It didn’t stand a chance.

I think this thread needs more hijacks. Hence the following:

Does anyone else like oranges? I really do. All sweet and juicy, and summery…And they’re full of vitamin C. Best if they don’t have seeds, though.

Yeah, the ones with seeds are just like Captain Janeway.

Did you know that all seedless oranges are clones of the same sport?
I hope the Republicans don’t find out.

What would Bush do?

And I hope Arwen really isn’t at Helm’s Deep in the EE.