Not to continue the derail, but I believe that the rate of sociopathy is around 2-3% of the population.
Few sociopaths are women, though, and I don’t really think shit-testing is a sociopathic behavior, but more one born of extreme immaturity and dependency. Maybe.
My category of ‘asshole’ is much wider than sociopathy, and encompasses irredeemable jerks of all descriptions.
A “shit test”, in at least its original meaning (The Game and earlier), is quite common and people of both genders do it, and not just in pickup situations.
It can be something as simple as: Say I happen to mention a video game, and the person I’m talking to says something like “Oh, you play those things do you?” and most people will immediately go into a “No, no, no, just rarely” type response and come off weak (of course it might be true that you only play games rarely, but there are ways of saying that that don’t sound like you’re apologizing).
No-one is keeping a scorecard of “strong” or “weak”, or consciously testing anyone it’s just something that happens in many social interactions.
You pass a shit test by just being confident with who you are and not seeking approval.
Like most things in PUA, it’s actually a pretty positive message that got corrupted somewhere down the line, whether internally or externally I can’t say.
Then I’ll up the number to around 5%, to include extremists and those so selfish that they are almost sociopathic. I don’t know who sucks harder.
PUA?
PUA = Pick Up Artist.
Shit-testing is an act of a fundamentally insecure person. Such people can rarely be trusted, IMHO.
That is an awfully broad brush you’re painting with there.
American women make up about 3% of the total women on the planet, so…depends on your definition of “broad brush”.
And I was waiting for someone to shit-test me on that.
But yes, I think it’s usually true…mainly with the younger generation, though. My mom’s generation is pretty loyal, relatively. Younger girls, though, have a lot more options than my mom did at their age, plus more earning power…and they are not necessarily encouraged to “settle down”.
This becomes a problem when there’s a household, kids, friends/family in common, etc…
Roughly 2/3 of all divorces in America are filed by women. The younger generation of women in this country, on average, just cannot be trusted to be loyal, whatever you want to make of that.
I think you’re talking about submissiveness, not loyalty. Women of today are not content to be stuck in the house barefoot and pregnant doing whatever the man says. That doesn’t mean they’re not loyal, but they are not going to just sit back and be a servant to their husband.
Either that or men are just too apathetic to file papers and just walk out.
One thing’s for sure: whatever the explanation is, it only takes one sentence, and it’s either all men’s fault or all women’s fault.
Let me put it this way…my wife’s not subservient to me. Hell, she’s got a Women’s Studies degree from Smith. She DOES, however, make an effort to keep me happy. Why? She’s loyal.
This is part of the truth, no doubt. Certainly not the whole story, but definitely part of it. I agree that there are marriages that have no rational reason to continue, from either spouse’s POV, but where the man is just too lazy/apathetic to file for divorce. That’s not always what’s happening,
What I see there, looks like that sometimes someone may run into a self-inflicted “shit test” by getting unnecessarily defensive.
OK, now just two sentences up you said that certain responses will come off as weak and must be rephrased. Yet now nobody’s keeping score of “weak”… or just not consciously.
That getting defensive when it’s uncalled for creates a negative impression, is something most of us knew all along. The PUA/Game people have a knack for taking what would be valid behavioral observations and putting them in terms that will tick off large swaths of the public.
Actual deliberate “shit-testing” would be a dickish/bitchy thing to do.
Well, the people they’re trying to teach these skills to are, almost always, seriously socially awkward/clueless. Plus they’re men.
That means you have to make it really, really simple and clear and obvious.
I don’t know if that’s sad or funny.
“Accurate” and “reality-based” would also be good. 
Well, no, not if your response to a shit-test is to not get defensive.
A much better response to “Oh you play those things, do you?”, if you do actually play games is simply the truth: “Yes”.
The public seem to be very ticked off by the PUA concept, period.
But I agree there might be slightly less negative vibe if they were called “confidence tests” than “shit tests”.
I wonder what she’d think about your broad, idiotic generalizations about American women in this thread.
It sounds very negative the way you describe it. What’s so positive about being so insecure you need to test other people’s confidence?