Ok, there’s this guy I have been seeing who I found out was a big FAT PHONY and wanted nothing more than to play and embarrass me by pretending he was into me. I want to give him a piece of his medicine SO BAD and let him no that I’m a force to be reckoned with but a part of me is telling me to just let it go…thoughts?
I want to but what he did was WRONG:mad:
It’s not worth it. He’s not worth it.
Yeah, and so, what?
And because of this it makes sense for you to prolong your relationship with a fat phony because…why, again?
Revenge is not a good answer, and chances are you’ll lose. You didn’t really give much detail in your OP, but if you did chances are it won’t change the answers.
Walk away. And wecome to the Straight Dope.
sighI guess you are right…I should just leave him alone and let him play more women…
Yea, I’ma just try to forget about it and move on, even though it really hurt me. & thanks!
I got two aphorisms for you:
Living well is the best revenge.
Resentment is like taking poison and expecting the other person to die.
I am in the “let it go” camp.
Players and phonies SUCK. Honest, the best thing is to get as far away, as soon as you can. Find someone better to date. Living well is the best revenge. Really, it is.
Thanks guys appreciate all the advice!
Moving to IMHO.
I agree–the best thing to do would be to give *him *poison.
By tryning to get him back, your more likely to give him exactly what he wants.
“Players” usually have it in their mind the more of an emotional response they can get out of a women the more they must be into them. They are trolls, the more attention you give to them the more it feeds their inflated ego.
The best way to get him back is never speak to him again in any form what so ever.
Give him Chantix, that medicine for smoking cessation. Have you read the side effects?! He’ll be farting like a government mule.
In any case, the answer is just to let it go, but in the interest of personal growth, is it possible to at least consider the possibility that you were just more interested in him than he was in you, and that you want to punish him for that? Because if that was the case, it’s really something you should figure out a mature response to. Or, maybe he was a self-centered player, I don’t know. In any case, the thing to do is just let it go.
How would you even get him back if he’s not actually into you? If he genuinely cared about you at one point but then cheated on you, it might make sense to pretend to take him back and then betray him…but if he never liked you, I don’t really see how anything you do would affect him.
Mr. Tove, please don’t advocate for doing harm to another person via improper use of prescription drugs.
slm2955, take everyone else’s advice: let it go. I’m sorry you’re hurting.
Man, I was really worried about mousing over the title. With the subject line about “getting him back” and a preview about him being a big phony, I was concerned that someone would want to get back together with such a jerk.
For as much as we worry about what other people think about us, especially “everyone”, it really comes down to this;
He displayed his true colors, his true character. You know it, some other people (those who paid attention and aren’t morons) know it. It may never be thrown back in his face so that he knows it, but is that really important? Is that what you really want here? For him to know that you think he’s an ass? Is that going to fix anything?
Or is it really only going to make you the ass?
I disagree with everyone who’s posted in the thread. slm2955, I encourage you to make a long, complicated plan to get him back. Then, regularly update us with details.
Just playing devil’s advocate, here.