Should you love your kids more than your spouse?

Anyone who doesn’t put the well-being of their child first has no buisness having children.

That’s why we have Maslow’s Hierarchy of needs to help figure that out.

Physiological needs come before safety needs which come before love needs which come before self-esteem needs which come before self-actualization needs.

This hierarchy can be applied to interpersonal interactions as well as intrapersonal.

Within a class of needs, further hierarchization can be found. Physiologically, the kids can go hungry for a while so mom gets the medicine needed to save her life.

I don’t think the relationship is in jeopardy if both people realize from the outset what having a child will mean. Yes, everyone’s human and frustration will occur but a strong relationship can thrive even under the most stressful conditions.

My husband and I have discussed this many times, at length. We both have the same ideas about what raising a child would entail-- that rather than dedicating our energies towards each other, we would have to focus them on this little being that we have created. We both decided that it’s not something we want to do. We take child-rearing too seriously to ever try to do it half-assed.