*sigh* Twas the day before the day before Christmas...

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

…and I am not really sure where to put this. It most likely isn’t strong enough for the Pit, but it’s still early - it could go either way I guess.

I just got a phone call from GypsyBoy. He sounded upset. Very upset. He proceeds to tell me that when all the bills are done being paid this week (bewteen yesterday and today), he will be effectively broke and will have no money for my Christmas present.

I looked guiltily at the PS3 I just picked up out of layaway yesterday. All wrapped and Christmassy. Mind you I had to scrimp and save to get it. We both work, but he is the major breadwinner. We basically live from check to check right now, with my money filling in the gaps wherever we need it. I know he wasn’t joking to throw me off the “gift trail” - he’s usually not good at that and I can see right through him. We’re both looking for second jobs to help out, but we barely see each other as it is, because our schedules are pretty opposite.

I don’t know what to do. I am a little heartbroken, because this is the first year since we have been together that I have been able to get him something awesome for Xmas. I know he really REALLY wanted the PS3, but I don’t know what to do with it. Should I just return it and chalk it up to another crappy Xmas (third in a row for anyone who cares)? We’ve gone the last three without being able to get each other anything, and I really thought this year was going to be different with me finally done with school and working. I don’t really care about me and my gifts at all, so thats not really the point.

I KNOW it’s not about the gifts, but please…refrain from chiming in with the whole “but JESUS is the reason for the season” if that is your first instinct. No offense to anyone, but that’s really not what I’m in the mood for right now…

So do I return his gift and just make like Xmas doesn’t exist this year? Should I wait and see what happens in the next two days?

sigh This sucks, Dopers. I’m not sure what to do here - would giving him the gift be like a “screw you” somehow?? His b-day is in February, should I hold it til then? I’m not sure why Im having such a hard time with this, but I just feel so…sad about it. For him more than anything else I think. This year has been a bitch for us, and I think he wanted to get me something super-awesome, too - and I think I know what it was supposed to be…we had to sell my engagement ring a while back because we were broke. I think he had been working on replacing it this year.

I just don’t know what to do, I just feel like collapsing into a heap and crying. It seems if you’re not well-off, this is a pretty depressing time of year. :frowning:

2

Why can’t you give him the PS3 and expect nothing in return? What’s wrong with that?

3

(((((LilGypsyGirl)))))

If I were you, I’d give him the gift and tell him that you’d be much happier having a roof over your head and food on the table than a gift from him. He can always buy you something when he’s got the money for it, and to be honest I think that maybe giving him the PS3 would make you feel good and it means your Christmas wouldn’t maybe be as bad as previous ones.

After all, you both need cheering up and perhaps the look on his face when he unwraps that box might be the highlight of your day.

Happy Christmas to you both!

4

Leaffan, I’m really not expecting anything in return, actually. Like I said, I’m not worried about me in the least. I guess just hearing hearing him sound so upset about it makes me second guess what I should do.

5

Give him the gift. Then tell him he can buy you a belated Christmas present once he is flush with funds again.

You saved for it, he really wants it. He may feel bad about not getting you anything in return, but there’s nothing wrong with getting a gift late.

6

Maybe it would make him feel awful?

I feel for you, LilGypsyGirl… Can you somehow put it in a way that it is “our gift?” Is there something hubby can do for you instead of a tangible gift, such as cooking dinner? A dance? Something romantic? A gift don’t have to be super-expensive, it’s the thought that counts, right? Share the awesome together.

7

That’s it Crowbar! And I couldn’t put it into words! Thank you! I’m afraid it will make him feel like shit - like he “failed in his duties” somehow (which he hasn’t - he busts his ass at work and keeps us afloat). I know he really wants the thing, but if I knew for sure it was going to hurt him, I would return it in a second. :frowning:

8

I thought it was implied that if they’re living pay check to pay check maybe they should use the money from the PS3 for something else?

9

I was going to post exactly what Crowbar of Irony +3 wrote!

I hope you both enjoy that wonderful gift over the holidays!

10

PS3 plays Blu-Rays, right? Maybe you could suggest renting a couple of movies to go along with the romantic dinner.

11

Would you enjoy using the PS3 as well? You could share use of it, and consider it a gift to both of you.

12

I think you should still give him the PS3. If he really feels bad about not getting you anything, tell him a raincheque will do just as good - he can surprise you at some point in the near future.

13

Give him the PS3 and tell him that all you want for Christmas is to be sexed up until your vision goes blurry. Then you each got a present that is really a gift for both of you! :wink:

14

I completely agree with Crowbar. Share the gift and make it a special treat for the both of you.

My only concern is if he doesn’t get you ANYTHING for Christmas. He could buy a picture frame at the Salvation Army and pop in a cute photo of the two of you. Or make you some stupid “love” coupons. As long as he makes an effort. It’s easy to say “I don’t have $50 to get you the gift I really wanted to get you, so you don’t get anything at all.” But if he doesn’t expend any energy on it, maybe it’s not so good a sign…

15

Did you get him any games for it? Maybe something with a co-op mode you two can play together?

If it were me, I’d say it was a gift for both of us, but you know your man best.

16

Give it to him as a gift for both of you. Honestly, that’s what most couples I know do each year - get something big they both really want.

If he freaks out or feels bad about it, just say “ok will it make you feel better if we return it and use the money for bills?” and if he says yes, do that.

17

How is he the major breadwinner and yet will be broke after paying bills, but you can afford a PS3?

Color me confused. Do you not contribute to the household bills etc? :confused:
By all means, give him the PS3 and you both enjoy it. It seems more likely to me that your husband will be pissed about the splurge rather than hurt because you got him an expensive gift and he got you nothing.

18

I was kinda wondering about this too.

19

Make it a gift for “us” and challenge him to a strip video game tournament…

20

Another vote for give it to him. If he’s “busting his ass” to keep the both of you afloat, that’s his gift to you, and worth more than a video game console. Don’t let him forget it.

If he’s sincerely not happy about your buying the gift for him, just explain you got it before he gave it the bad news and it can be returned.