Signs you are soon going to appear naked in a softcore erotic thriller/romance, etc.

There’s a lot of talk about “so-and-so’s going to be doing hardcore porn soon” whenever some actress/actor manages to badly bobble his/her career. But that almost never happens. What DOES happen is that such actresses/actors wind up doing nude scenes in softcore films, most often “erotic thrillers” which give at least minimal cover to being something other than pure porn. I’ll cite some examples:

  1. Ads for your new softcore porn series are showing up on the premium cable channel that’s running it. (David Duchovny, “Californication” on Showtime).

  2. You’re really, REALLY determined to shed that ‘little girl’ image you picked up in that long-running TV series you played such a charming urchin on. (Alyssa Milano, "Embrace of the Vampire.)

  3. That movie you were in when you were younger typecast you so badly that when you became an adult actress, you had trouble finding roles in movies that weren’t “adult” for a while. (Lysette Anthony, Dead Cold and others.)

  4. Your drinking/drug problems have gotten so bad that you’ve been arrested for DUI/possession several times and the people who write insurance for movies are getting real nervous about you. (Lindsay Lohan hasn’t done any erotic thrillers yet, though “I Know Who Killed Me” looks like it might be one.)

Any other signs?

Baywatch was cancelled and you need another job. (Krista Allen, Pamela Anderson, Traci Bingham, Yasmine Bleeth, Donna D’Errico, Nicole Eggert, Carmen Electra, Erika Eleniak, Gena Lee Nolin, Alexandra Paul, Brande Roderick)

I was about to say “when the cheesy saxophone music starts up,” but I guess you’re thinking a little more long-term.

I have no idea who Lysette Anthony is. A good example might Anne Hathaway from “Princess Diaries”. Before she showed the goods in “Brokeback Mountain” she did a move called “Havoc” with a pretty explicit topless sex scene.

And I was about to say, “When the doorbell rings and it’s the pizza guy,” but then I saw that the OP said softcore.

You have a messy affair and are having a hard time being seen as the sweet ingenue. (I’m thinking of Meg Ryan)

You leave a successfull TV show to break into movies (David Caruso NYPD to Jade in one move).

Good point, shoulda been more specific. Anthony played the kidnapped princess in Krull. She was later quoted bemoaning the fact that her role in Krull had typecast her and made it hard to find work as an adult. A shame, even as an adult she retained those huge, luminous eyes.

You’re tired of playing the second hot girl to die screaming in slasher movies. :eek:

So you get tired of working on “Days of Our Lives” and you do some softcore. But the spousal abuse is kinda heavy, so you call the cops. Poor actress. Wait a minute … it’s Brian Heidik, an actor…

You want to ensure you are never hired for a sequel or remake of a family oriented program. Ala Maureen McCormick aka Marcia, Marcia, Marcia

Also to include Lisa Bonet

In Brady Bunch and Cosby Show respectively. All links SFW

SSG Schwartz

Does Jessica Biel fall into this one, too?

They dubbed her voice in Krull, too. Hiding her stunning UK accent with some bland American crap. Tragic.

I know her best from the TV show “Three Up, Two Down”.

When you have no recognizable acting talents, but are married to a B-movie producer willing to throw money away to show off his trophy wife.

Bo Derek, Pia Zadora.

I don’t know, you tell me.

The name I think MAY fall suprisingly into this one is:

Anniston. As in, Jennifer Anniston. Her rape scene in “Derailed” isn’t at all pornographic, or for that matter, visible. But I found the movie too murky and boring to watch so I can’t say it’s an erotic anything. But Anniston does have a naked sex scene. Maybe her appearance in “Derailed” is a precursor of sorts …

Well, I do remember reading that she posed for some nude or semi nude photos because she was trying to get off Seventh Heaven/shed the squeaky clean image.

Dunno if any of her naked scenes in actual movies qualify as softcore, though.

She does appear to have posed nude in a sex scene, though with nothing but breasts showing, in the movie “London” according to Robb’s Celebrity Damsels. Pics at the link. NSFW s linking disabled. You’ll have to copy and paste.