Silly Useless Vehicles

SUV’s suck.

People who drive them are (frequently) poseurs and macho assholes who want to intimidate other drivers.

For goodness’ sake, there’s a whole web site devoted to making fun of this ridiculous trend.

Can’t you listen to the macarena or get a pet rock or something?

For goodness’ sake, can’t you do a search and find out that many Anti-SUV threads are already in existence?

But if you don’t like them: don’t buy one. In other words: what’s your point, other than raising the hairs of a few SUV owners with short fuses?


Hey, if you’re against the death penalty, just don’t commit any capital crimes, right?

Oops…thought this thread was about fatherjohn’s cranium…

I see you’ve taken the The Ryan School of Analogies, fatherjohn.
Now, please explain what your point is, OK?

[loud Tom Servo voice] YAAAAWWNNN! [/loud Tom Servo voice]

Anyone interested in entering this “debate” about the asshole to SUV driver ratio can find the wit and wisdom of fatherjohn and others at:

It’s a six pager. Make some coffee.

doin’ the Macarena with her pet rock

I totally agree with you fatherjohn.

And as one newbie to another, kudos on the fact that you’ve learned to quote and bold and make the faces so soon. It took me a little while. I find it really does add some credibility around here.

Some might find your topic a little gratuitous, not me. I live in a state where there’s los of suvs and I hate it. You don’t need them for christs sake. Up here, those in the know get subarus, as I myself have. I think if someone lives way out in the country, well, that’s tough shit, y’know? Make several grocery/household needs runs instead of one.

The way you linked your statement to coldfires is brilliant. You kinda remind me of another poster here, The Ryan, except you can tell he’s a sissy. But, your logic is solid anyway. And you don’t beat around the bush. No subtlety there, I like that. There are so many people around here who are ignorant of their ignorance, pisses me off. (I said that in another argument, but they didn’t get it- but I bet you do.)

You strike me as an outdoors kind of guy. I’m wondering if we could discuss fishing at some point, if you fish, that is.
Anyway, Welcome to the boards. I think you’re going to like it here, especially the pit, it’s a blast…


how about looking on the otherside (again). OK. ** PROBLEM ** say you and your two best friends wanna go a restaurant. you are going to want something that can fit them all in, COMFORTABLY, right? ** solution ** a large car

** PROBLEM ** after you eat, you want to go off-roading on the neighborhood off-roading track. ** SOLUTION ** a Large truck.

** PROBLEM ** tomorrow you have to take Johnny and his friends to Soccer practice. ** SOLUTION ** a mini-van (blech)

so you want a hybrid of ALL of the above cars. selectable 4 wheeldrive; ability to seat 5 full-grown men comfortably; TONS of room for storage; high towing capacity. Sometimes people need a vehicle that can switch from off-road vehicle to family van to car. that’s what a Sport utility is. some poeple’s needs are different from others. just because you don’t need it; doesn’t mean you can knock it. Hell, I don’t knock cadillacs because I don’t need (afford) one…

dammit… don’t bother fixing the VB code…

Ad, that is just silly. Everyone knows that everyone who owns an SUV is a selfish, self-centered bastard. Didn’t you read the 6 page debate on this (link posted above)? Don’t bother feeding it.

Zette :slight_smile:

Problem You want to keep up with the latest trend.
Solution Get an SUV.

Problem You want to bully other drivers.
Solution Get an SUV.

By the way, would you care to speculate as to how many LEXUS RX300’s are taken to “the neighborhood off-roading track”?

Okay, so it’s one thing to own an SUV in areas with snowfall, or lots of off-road conditions, or mountainous terrain, or whatever. But could I please have someone’s permission to make the point that maybe it’s a wee bit over the top to own an SUV in South Florida, where every road is a 4-lane, 55 mph highway, and it’s all flat, and 95% of the SUV owners do nothing but go between the mall and their house in the suburban hell that is this county?

How the heck are you?? I’ve haven’t seen you in a dogs age!

Oh, and my husband and I use our SUV for transporting his music equipment around to shows as well as for four wheel drive access. If we lived in Florida we would still be transporting a bunch of music equipment around, so we would want an SUV. Plus the dog loves it! And the seats are heated! And we look ultra-cool rich, rich, RICH in it! :slight_smile:

Anyway, my point is, whether someone has a housefull of kids, or music equipment or stray armadillos to transport, it’s really up to them what kind of car/truck/SUV/schoolbus to drive.

(PS- does your Dad let you drive that sweet sports car he got a while back? I know you were loving it…)

Sani: you can’t measure things like that. It would mean a Ferrari is over the top as well, wouldn’t it?

I don’t know. I woulnd’t buy an SUV in a million years (I’d buy a real 4 by 4 though), but I’m not gonna stand in anyones way. Even if they live in Florida.

A lot of people in the Netherlands own Subaru Outbacks and the like. All flat here, almost no snow. It’s their call.

It took me a minute or two to get this:

But fuck, you’re right. I never thought of it like that! I’m going to use it on the guys at work!

exactly Zette - - –

wanna show off your money?
buy a sportscar!

wanna be like a rap star?
buy a big old car!

wanna be exactly like everyone else, and not your own person?
get a regular car!

wanna look like you are a giant hick and never seen a tarred road before?
buy a Truck!

  • DAMN * ; guess I can’t buy a car…

gimme a break…

Personally, all I can say is that soon as I hit the lottery, I’m buyin’ me a Hummvee…

(smoldering over my crappy Mercury and being poor)

Hey Zette! Glad to see you’re still around here too! I’ve been doing pretty good… and yeah, they let me drive the C70 on occasion, but I bought my grandpa’s '92 Celica back in August, and I like it, so that’s what I drive for the most part.

Originally posted by Coldfire

See, to me, a Ferrari is over the top. But only for me personally. Sure, everyone’s free to (wear sunscreen) buy an SUV or a Ferrari or a Hummer if they want, even if they don’t need it. Bill Gates went and built a huge-ass house in Washington, and no one stopped him. I’m just saying that if I won a bajillion dollars in the lottery tomorrow, I wouldn’t buy a car that was worth more than maybe $50,000. I see kids at school that get $70,000 Range Rovers for their 16th birthdays and it makes me want to roll my eyes out of my skull, but I ain’t gonna stop them if their parents want them to be spoiled brats.

What really gets up my nose are those damned Honda Civic drivers. “Ooh, look at me? I am so kewl with my Japanese characters on my deck lid and “Powered by Honda” on my windscreen! [What *else would a Honda be powered by? – JLA] I’m so fast an maneuverable, I can cut right in front of this SUV! What? There’s no room? What’s he gonna do? Hit me? Move over lard-ass! Yeah, I belong in the fast lane. Oops! There’s my exit 100 feet ahead! I guess I’d better zip over four lanes so I can get off the freeway! No problem! I’m in a Civic!”

The truth is this: I see more small car drivers behaving like assholes than I do SUV drivers. I’ll bet fatherjohn drives like a prick just to piss off SUV drivers who are driving sanely.

fatherjohn, I have a challenge for you: You bring your small car and I’ll bring my Jeep to Rowher Flats, near Agua Dulce, CA. We’ll take the easy trail between Sierra Highway and Boquet Canyon Road. If you make it through, you can tell me whether I need 4WD and some ground clearance. :wally:

I kinda have to go with Fatherjohn. I don’t mind the real SUV’s, the explorer, pathfinder, 4runner, etc (if you have a use for them)… but the cadillac, lexus, and mercedes SUV’s? Please. I’ve been in a lot of places requiring 4WD, but never during a river crossing have I felt the need for a heated steering wheel, individual climate control or a softer ride so my cappucino doesn’t slosh out of the gimballed cup holder. Kinda like a $5,000 Rolex… A Timex does the same job if not better, but it doesn’t impress people like the name does. But if you have nothing better to spend money on, more power to you. Just the opinion of a useless tool :smiley: