All right, I admit it.
I cannot wink. You know, where you close one eyelid while keeping the other open? Can’t do it. Well, okay, I can close my left eyelid only, but it means that my right eye is cross-eyed and barely visible within the moronic semi-squint I’m able to produce. I get much less raucous laughter when I simply tell people, “I can’t wink.” So my brain has trained itself to be able to just look through one eye, even with both open.
But this leads me to:
"Simple" body tricks I cannot do:
– wink either eye
– touch my tongue to my nose
– crack my knuckles by making a fist and squishing it with the other hand
– curl the left side of my lip "Simeple" body tricks I CAN do:
– bend the top segment of each finger backwards to a minimum 45 degree angle (maximum: 90)
– wiggle my ears
– lock the first two segments of each finger straight and have the top segment bend forward (this gives a really sick “pocket” between the tendons in my finger; I can actually hold a penny between them)
– partially dislocate my shoulders and hips (fun when you put someone’s hand on your shoulder and say, “just feel”, and after a second they jump away saying, “oh my GOD THAT’S NASTY!”)
– hyperextend my elbows (naturally), so if I “straighten” my arms and hold them above my head, they form a ‘Y’ instead of two parallel lines
So, fellow Dopers, share your body’s talents, or lack thereof!
I can wink both eyes,
curl my tongue in a U-shape (which is great for the old 5th grade habit of hhhawking up loogies)
I can crack all my knuckles by pulling on the joints
I can crack my neck by grabbing my chin with one hand and the back of my head with the other and …twwwwiiiiist!! There is a series of wratchet pops and people half a room away say "was that your neck?!?
I can move my ears up and down…
I cannot curl the right side of my lip
I can’t do that finger-in-the-mouth super loud whistle (and am inexplicably jealous of those who can…
I can’t snap my fingers, control individual eyebrows or whistle. I try but I just can’t! Argh!
Oh yeah, and I can’t wink either. I can only manage to even get close with my right eye and it still looks bizarre.
I can wiggle my eyes really fast back and forth, do the vulcan sign easily (why did Dr McCoy always complain? My hands just naturally fall into that position), almost dislocate one of my knees, and grin just on the right side of my mouth–actually that’s pretty much my smile, a lopsided one.
I can’t bend my fingers back (why in hell would I want to?), but I can make the Vulcan sign, and do that “when the shark bites” thing by moving my pinky.
I can’t wiggle my ears, but I can wiggle my nose.
I can’t touch my nose with my tongue, but I can wiggle my tongue like a flag in a hurricane, and some people find that enjoyable.
I can’t wink without going crosseyed, like zweisamkeit and Caesar’s Ghost;,in my case the one I can sort of barely pretend to keep open is my left eye instead.
I can’t wiggle my ears.
I can’t touch my tongue to my nose.
I can’t curl either side of my lip.
In fact, aside from making the Vulcan side with my right hand (but not, of course, my left) and being able to pop damn near every joint in my body (not at the same time, though), I don’t think I can do much anything. I’m so pathetic!
I worked out how to raise either eyebrow independantly. Since I stopped being a sullen sarcastic 16 year old I haven’t had much occasion to use that ability.
I used to be able to whistle with any of my fingers but now I can only do it with either my first two or middle two fingers. Still’s bloodly loud though.
I can cross my eyes.
I can roll my tongue.
And I can flare my nostrils for a great Braveheart impression.
That’s what most people think when they see it (although after checking it out, yes with a protractor, I’ll amend the 90 degrees to about 70), but then again (remembering more as people post) …
I can:
– twist my thumb up so it sits on the top of my hand and stays there
– have the two toes next to each big toe bend the top segment backwards as well (just like my fingers)
– curl my tongue into a roll, or curl the tip of the tongue backwards so it folds onto the rest of the tongue
– rotate my right wrist and right ankle repeatedly so they make a snapping sound every single rotation
– lift my foot up, hold it with my hand (with the leg bent at the knee backwards) and touch my ribcage with my foot
– and the vulcan hand sign is a piece of cake
I can’t:
– raise either eyebrow singly
– whistle very well at all (get more of a whooshing with a slight whistle sound)
– snap my fingers, except slightly when I use my ring finger instead of middle or index Urban Ranger, people often get freaked out at all the finger things. I know I’m rather double-jointed, so I guess that explains it.
I can’t really whistle. I can approximate it if I suck the air in to whistle, but can’t whistle by blowing out. Really frustrating because having a good loud whistle is such a great thing.
Isn’t the inability to do the Vulcan “live long and prosper” thing with your fingers genetically determined, too? Because I can’t do that OR roll my tongue.
Whistle, with finger assist or without. I hate that
Snap my fingers in an authoritative way - I get a feeble snap at best
Raise one eyebrow - clearly the coolest of these little tricks.
I can:
Wink, although it is not a natural thing - it feels forced (which is probably good because rare is the person who winks and comes across as charming instead of slimy, IMHO)
curl my tongue
crack more knuckles and joints than I care to recall
