“Any religion that embraces carob is not for Carl Carlson.”
Carl: “It reminds me of my Icelandic boyhood.”
Moe’s bar. A far-off whistle signals the end of the working day. The usual crowd files in, each saying, “Evening, Moe.” Camera pans right. Barny walks out of restroom in bathrobe brushing teeth and says, “Morning, Moe.”
YellowTail: Which is itself, I think, a reference to the Sheepdog/Coyote timeclock routine of Warner Bros. fame.
You reminded me of this gem:
Homer: “Will this be broadcast live?”
Other actor: “No, Homer. Very few cartoons are done live. It puts a tremendous strain on the animators’ wrists.”
Six freakin’ pages and nobody’s mentioned the “Mr. Sparkle” commercial?
I’ve no idea what the eps were called …
Townspeople are rioting, someone throws a cinderblock threw a shop window and everyone starts stealing … cinderblocks
My favourite Ralph line ; “Me, fail English? That’s unpossible”
Homer makes up a fake name [when talking to Moe] Joey Jim Jack Johnson, Moe says “that’s the worst name I ever heard” . A guy gets up and runs out crying, Barney yells after him “hey what’s wrong Joey Jim Jack?”
Bart is playing in a football match, the camera pans the crowd and we see Hank and Peggy Hill (from King Of The Hill) - Hank says something, but I forget what. (Didn’t they do a knock off of the King Of The Hill title sequence as well?)
The re-run I saw the other night had Fat Tony and his co-horts driving to a show down with Homer, I’m sure that sequence was a knock off of something but I don’t know what (the Soprano’s maybe?)
The Hallow e’en one where Homer is in the 3-D world, he says “this looks expensive, I better do something” and starts scratching his backside.
When Homer wants to buy illegal fireworks at a convenience store, he uses the time-honored technique of disguising your embarrassing purchase by also buying a lot of other items. Except the ‘everyday’ items he buys are an enema, condoms, a lowbrow porno magazine, and I can’t remember what else. He also gets the fireworks.
Back at the cabin later, Marge unpacks the grocery bag and tells Homer, “I don’t know what you have in mind for tonight, but count me out!”
Whiskey!
We use this joke all the time when we can’t remember someone’s name - I believe the made-up name was “Joey Joe Joe Junior Shabadoo.”
One of my favorites is when Bart and Lisa are in the same class and go on a field trip:
Nelson: Ha ha!
Mrs. McConnell: You weren’t on this field trip, young man! How’d you get here?
Nelson: Biked.
Just the offhand way Nelson responds cracks me up!
When Homer takes the kids to see “The Re-Deadening,” the posters outside advertise “A Matrix Christmas,” showing Keanu in his black togs and a santa hat, and “You’re in the Matrix, Charlie Brown.”
Mel Gibson reading an “anonymous” response card by Frink:
“Liked it despite the abscence of flubber… [in a puzzled voice] Glaven?”
Maybe because I’m a new parent, “Marge vs. Singles, Seniors, Childless Couples and Teens, and Gays” seemed to have a wealth of good little jokes -
Maggie’s favorite singer (whose work is soporific dreck) is named “Roofi”
At his Woodstock-esque concert, a mother in line for the portolets passes out, her baby crawls away, and another baby toddles up to her and starts breastfeeding.
Heard on the TV : “Bobby, I’ve got propane in my urethra.”
Mrs. Krabappel: We all got tired of that chalkboard stuff a long time ago.
I don’t think I’ve seen this one posted yet, but one of my favorites is when the Germans buy the power plant and they are having a meeting with Homer. One of the Germans says something about being from “the land of chocolate”, and Homer goes off into this daydream where he’s running through a chocolate town and eating everything in sight. Eventually someone repeatedly saying “Mr Simpson” snaps him out of it and he says “You were saying something about the land of chocolate?” And the German says “That was ten minutes ago.”
In Homerpalooza, when Billy Corgan and Homer first meet:
Billy Corgan: “Hi, I’m Billy Corgan, Smashing Pumpkins.”
Homer: “Homer Simpson, smiling politely.”
PS That joke was later stolen almost verbatim by the writers of the movie Bowfinger.
“We drove two thousand miles for this?”
The Sopranos’ opening credit sequence. Shot-for-shot, it was almost an exact match, as far as camera angles, though of course the content of the shots was totally Springfieldian.
“Ooh, this place looks expensive! I feel like I’m wasting a fortune just standing here!..Well, better make the most of it.” Then he burped to see the resultant vibrations.
Every once in a while I rememeber this moment from the Beer Baron episode and just crack up on the spot.
detective in standing on a cliff overlooking Springfield
Detective: Beer Baron, you may run, you may hide, but as God as my witness I will catch you.
And then we hear way off in the distance in the town below…
Beer Baron: No you won’t!
To add to Joeski’s post…
Rex Banner: Yes I will.
::off in the distance::
Beer Baron: Do’h!
Last night’s ep was “Colonel Homer”. In the opening sequence, Marge and Homer are in the Springfield Googleplex, watching The Stockholm Affair. The particular moment that cracks me up is when Homer lightly taps the bottom of his soda cup and all the ice shoots into his mouth at once, and his eyes get real big (it’s funny because it’s true).
Later in the ep, Homer goes to Lurleen’s trailer park, which has a sign that says “Now 14 days without a tornado”. Well, I had never noticed it before, but the next time Homer visits Lurleen, the 14 has been changed to a two.
Of course my favorite comes from the Whacking Day episode when Homer says "Lisa,
Thanks for correcting my mistakes there guys!! 
I can never remember that Joey Joe name. I was right that was a Soprano’s knock off??!! (I’ve never seen The Soprano’s)
Homer: Sir, I need to know where I can get some business hammocks.
Hank: Hammocks? My goodness, what an idea. Why didn’t I think of that? Hammocks! Homer, there’s four places. There’s the Hammock Hut, that’s on third.
Homer: Uh-huh.
Hank: There’s Hammocks-R-Us, that’s on third too. You got Put-Your-Butt-There?
Homer: Mm-Hmm.
Hank: That’s on third. Swing Low, Sweet Chariot… Matter of fact, they’re all in the same complex; it’s the hammock complex on third.
Homer: Oh, the hammock district.
Hank: That’s right.
Bart: Uh, yes, I’m looking for a friend of mine. Last name Jass. First name
Hugh.
Moe: Uh, hold on, I’ll check. [calling] Hugh Jass! Somebody check the
men’s room for a Hugh Jass!
Hugh: Uh, I’m Hugh Jass.
Moe: Telephone. [hands over the receiver]
Hugh: Hello, this is Hugh Jass.
Bart: [surprised] Uh, hi.
Hugh: Who’s this?
Bart: Bart Simpson.
Hugh: Well, what can I do for you, Bart?
Bart: Uh, look, I’ll level with you, Mister. This is a crank call that
sort of backfired, and I’d like to bail out right now.
Hugh: All right. Better luck next time. [hangs up] What a nice young man.
My favorite obscure reference is in the Prisoner episode (“The Computer Wore Menace Shoes”) where Homer creates his own internet website and makes up stuff to get people to visit the site, accidentally exposing a secret society that lives on an island (the Prisoner reference, apparently - I’ve never seen that show). They kidnap Homer, who is drugged repeatedly during the episode, and a doppleganger replaces him in Springfield.
After having his tea drugged (here’s the reference I love), Homer wakes up, blurry eyes coming into focus, with the empty cup on his stomach, and a clapping-cymbal monkey toy in front of him. This is a scene from the 1977 film Full Circle (aka The Haunting of Julia - a much better title, IMO) with Mia Farrow. I love this reference! Besides being a great movie, I don’t know anyone else who’s seen it. Which, of course, means nobody else gets the Simpsons reference.
And the Simpson Archive doesn’t have a reference for this either…