Every year for a Christmas bonus, my boss gives all the employees a $35 Honeybaked Ham gift certificate, plus a coupon for a free pie. The last couple of years, I never made it over to the Honeybaked store to make use of the gift certificates. So come this Christmas, I had $105 worth of Honeybaked money to use. Plus the pie.
My Granny asked everyone to bring something to Christmas dinner this year, so I immediately thought ham. But I knew Granny would have a ton of food that she prepared herself, because she can’t give any of the cooking duties up. (Every year she says she’s not going to cook, and every year…well she cooks enough food to feed 20 people, and there’s only 8 of us.) Anyway, I decided to just get a mini ham to take to Granny’s house. Perfect. Four pounds of luciousness, 8 people, that will be plenty and probably won’t be much left over. I thought.
Since I knew I would be wanting some ham all for myself, I bought 2 mini hams. One to take to Granny’s and one for me. Yep all for me. There was a ton of ham leftover at Granny’s house, but I managed to escape without a leftover package. I dodged a bullet there, because I had my own 4 lb brown sugar glazed hunk of heaven waiting for me in my own fridge. It has taken me 16 days to eat that 4 lbs of deliciousness, that got a little less delicious every day as yet another ham sandwich waited for me at the end of each day.
The first couple of days were great! I was counting down the hours at work as “5 hours left to ham!” and 3 hours left to ham!" Yanno, I get really excited about ham. I went through my first 8 pack of sesame seed buns and cheese slices…still had ham left. Back to the store. After the second 8 pack of sesame seed buns and cheese slices were gone, I had just pieces and chunks left, plus the bones. So I made hambone soup. And ham salad. Most of the soup stayed with my boyfriend. I ran out of bread tonight to put my ham salad on, so I made a wrap with a tortilla like bread called a flat-out.
I still have fucking ham salad left! Please don’t make me eat it! It’s just a little bit. Can I feed it to the dogs? I don’t have to have the bragging rights to eating the whole thing by myself. I’m gonna cry if I have to eat any more ham salad.
It will probably be another 3 years before I buy another Honeybaked Ham.
The pecan pie is still in the freezer. I’ll probably start on that tomorrow.
This sounds like awesome! Next time you should send me a mini-ham!
Or just save them up, and then MASS HAM everyone you know with Free Hams (assuming the store has shipping), it basically takes care of all the X-mas presents you need for a year!
I thought it would be awesome too **Ro0shie **my friend, but it was not awesome. (OK it was awesome for about 3 days.) You’d be suprised how far 4 lbs of ham goes. I don’t think I’d be back on anyone’s nice list the next year if I Hammed them for Christmas. Yeah, as awesome as it sounds, by day 16, you just really don’t want to open the fridge and see ham mocking you.
Hockey, you can Ham me on Christmas (or any other day), and you would definitely make my Nice List. I know you’re thinking “Yeah, I thought that, too” but I am serious. I was very sad last year (well, year before last/2007 actually) that my leftover ham only lasted 2 weeks.
A standard Ham Sammich should consist of 2 ounces of ham. A 4 pound Ham will yield 32 such portions, and should be consumed in a period no longer then a fortnight. If one feels they can not commit to this undertaking, they must prepare and share excess Ham Sammiches with friends, relatives, coworkers, me, etc.
Cog’s Ham Sammich
2 oz. Ham
1/2 ea. Kroger brand Zesty Dill Pickle*
1 TB Mayonaise
1/2 TB Yellow Mustard
1 ea. Iceburg Lettuce Leaf
2 slices Great Harvest brand Honey Whole Wheat Bread
Assemble Sammich.
Devour.
*Due to the logistical issues of storing the unused portion of Pickle, this recipe shall either be doubled, or the maker shall eat the unused pickle portion while assembling the Sammich
Geez. There are so many ways to eat ham other than sandwiches!
Easy ones, too. Here are two:
Cut some nice thick slices, then cut the slices into strips. Saute them with some chopped onion, then add a can of green beans (with juice). Optional: add some peeled & quartered potatoes. Bring to boil long enough to heat through/until potatoes are cooked and serve.
Cut strips of ham as above. Take a box of scalloped (or similar) potato mix. Put it together according to the instructions but mix in the ham strips. Bake for the regular time. Yum.
I know, I know, but I don’t get home from work till after 8:30 pm most days. After working 10-11 hours, I just don’t feel like cooking and sandwiches are easy.
Your problem is not an abundance of ham, it’s a lack of imagination.
Some of that ham should be in soup, some in a casserole, some fried with onions and potatoes, some diced and added to mac and cheese, some diced and added to mac and cheese with a can of diced tomatoes and green chilis thrown in, some sliced thick and topped with a pineapple slice and a slice of cheese and stuck under a broiler until the cheese is melted and slightly browned…only the soup takes more than 15 minutes to make!
Really, you should have come to us for help 14 days ago.
