I attemp to use the poop facilities at my white collar company about six times a year, and turn around and leave about three outta six times, because the toilets are so disgusting that it is hard to believe.
Thank Og I am regular and go at night at home.
The real crime is that whoever these jabba the hut slobs are, it is very likely someone is banging them and bleaching their putrified underwear.
“I’ll take Things I Never Needed To Read While Surfing the Dope for $1000, Alex.”
E.
I don’t know, if there’s anything disturbing about Philster’s post, it’s hardly that he’s an evening shitter.
I’m much more distressed at the image of Jabba the Hut peeling off some soiled funky tighty-whities and then getting it on with some poor woman. :eek:
That would be “Jabba the Butt”, eh?
(bolding mine)
Doors? These mammals are getting poop on the doors?
And I thought it was bad enough when working at another bank’s operation center (yeah, I guess there is something genetically wrong with bankers) that there was at least one individual who was in the habit of doing “farmer blows” onto the wall while at the urinal.
Poop goes into bowl
Water swirls all around
The walls don’t get brown
jarbabyj, for your humorous sign you ought to use Borborygmi’s post from the prehensile rectum thread. It may not shame the Disgruntled Shitter into cleaning up his act, but at least everyone else will get a chuckle out of it.
Or so he would like you to believe. I, however, am consulting for his firm (which means that mine doesn’t stink, given his view of consultants) and let me tell you, when he leaves the room, paper on bottom of shoe, it reeks.
Told tongue-in-cheek. I did share an elevator with him once, but that’s about it.
Not to mention that the clip-art possibilities for the sign are tremendous. Have some fun with it!
TO catch the culprit, well, you could watch real closely what people are eating, then, ya know, wait a day.
*Dear Employees,
Please join us in the Loop break room at 3:30 for coffee and anal probes.
Kindest regards,
Management*
If that makes you squeemish, then by all that is good and right, do not go into this thread. 
Am I the only one who read the title of this thread and thought it had something to do with feces being flung from the top of a skyscraper by disgruntled executives?
Never mind…
I must say, the fact that so many of you seem to recognize the poop miscalculator is hugely amusing.
I seem to recall having read something on the Dope once that said basically:
“Poop makes the world go brown.”
I wish I remember which genius came up with it - of course, it made my screen go brown, too. Not with poop, though. I was drinking a big cup of coffee when I read it, and started laughing.
Anyway, that saying would look well in a bathroom.
Well he’s (hopefully) not actually the miscalculator… But I do wonder if maybe more Dopers work for this particular company than for any other.
(It’d be funny to find out that I passed a Doper every day in the cafeteria or something and never knew it!)
::Makes mental note to not say anything that can be used against her::
I’ve presented some:
Happy Holidays! As Santa Goes Down The Chimney So Should Your Waste Flow Through Our Plumbing System
HAPPY HOLIDAYS: Let’s give a gift to our cleaning crew by not LEAVING a gift for our cleaning crew: IF YOU GET MY MEANING.
But the mild one that was accepted was:
NICE TOILETS MAKE NICE TENANTS - Let’s keep it neat.
Boring I know, but let’s remember this is corporate America.
My clip art ideas and indeed free form turd sketches were rejected summarily.
Gee, think maybe it’s the water?
I work in the Loop, too, and we have people with bodily waste management issues, too. Only on my floor it’s Jabba the Butt’s lovedolls and ballwashers pissing on the toilet seats and floors.
WTF?
But right on about “not all Loop eateries are 4 star” - some are so bad their awarded “cockroaches”
If they provide a sample, add it to the sign for emphasis?
Maybe you just need to have some of these installed.